Theory of Love

Begin Again.

 

A book about moving on says that time doesn't make us move on faster. It's hard work that stimulates us to forget the pain for a moment.

 

That's why I decide to spend all my time on many different things, both what I was assigned to do and what I put myself into doing, whether it be the faculty's work, projects, special activities, or the campus's events; I do everything. At least when I make an effort to do something, things about Khai disappear from my brain for a while.

 

The annual stage play is inching towards the deadline. I have to attend meetings more often, several times a week. We have to make deals with many teams before holding the first general meeting next week to assign specific jobs to each individual.

 

The Extreme Gang's situation is like still water. I don't meddle in anyone's personal life, just catching up on things from afar.

 

Khai and his girlfriend's relationship is going well. I saw them together many times. It hurts, but thinking about all the work I gotta get done, I realise I have no time to think about them.

 

Too has to do his fieldwork with the photo club more often while Bone spends his time with the sound team and his girls. It's our duty to make our friendship less close than before. We love each other but don't have to stick together. We all have dreams, and different ones at that.

 

In the past, I dreamed about getting into a relationship with someone I love and living together until we get old. We'd stand on a balcony, sharing a cigarette, then we'd kiss. I'd wake up the next morning to go to work as that person rushed out of our bed. We'd go to other provinces or travel abroad on holidays. We don't need to have much money in our bank accounts, just enough to keep us fed in the future.

 

Looking at that dream now, it's like the dream of an innocent fool who never experiences pain.

 

Now that I know, I've tossed that dream away to build a new one. I spend more time with my seniors talking about things. I want to be a real scriptwriter and make a real movie, and when I've made it, I'll watch it about fifty times before making another movie. When I've saved up a certain amount of money, I'm going to travel around the world.

 

Who knows? In the next thirty or forty years, I might be living in a different part of the world from the Extreme Gang. I might become an old man watching the world go on, not scared to die alone because I've learned that being in love is much more painful than that.

 

Is this some emotional scene in a soap?!

 

Well, the future is far away. I gotta get through the third year at university first, and I have to move my stuff with Too since I'm going to move for the third time.

 

At the end of last month, I contacted the owner of a condo who was renting out a room. I was ready to move in right away after signing a contract. My room isn't far from my friends', just five floors up, hello...I haven't told Bone and Khai about this because I think they're busy with their personal stuff, so I don't want to bother them. If Too hadn't been the one who let me stay with him for months, I wouldn't have told him either.

 

We've moved in a minute, and I have my own room once again. Too's condition about not bringing girls to his room, as we lived together, is now invalid. He seemed so happy and volunteered to help me move out so fast that I wanted to punch him in the face.

 

So I "I'm fucking exhaaaaausted," Too shouts out loud as he plops down on my bed. I, hands on my waist, look at him tiredly. "I told you I could move by myself."

 

"You're my friend. I can't just sit there and watch you coming in and out, moving stuff, dumbass."

 

"Wasn't it because you had to clear some space for your next model?"

 

"Don't act as if you know me."

 

"When will you stop being a playboy?" I ask, though I know it's an unanswerable question.

 

"What a stupid question. It's like asking, 'when will you stop breathing?" I knew it. How can I get a sensible answer from a guy like him? Besides, Khai, Too, and Bone are also scumbags. They'd never commit themselves to anyone.

 

"Yeah, I'm sorry. My brain doesn't filter questions well."

 

"There must be a day when I get tired. Do you seriously think that someone would run around having fun without stopping?"

 

"You would."

 

"I'm human, not the Flash. I can't keep running without getting tired. I might stop at someone someday."

 

"Give me a reason that makes you want to stop."

 

'Time and a chance. Time means I'll be too old to run, fucking tired."

 

"A chance is like...when you meet someone who is definitely your type, but the timing is bad because you still want to keep running; that relationship won't work. My chance is that I find someone compatible with me when I'm too tired to run around; then I'll stop. That's it."

 

"Then if we meet in the next ten years when you've stopped yourself, will you choose me?"

 

"Then if I meet a cow at that time, will I have to make it my wife?"

 

"What?"

 

"You said as if I wouldn't choose at all. Back off if you have small tits." Sorry for frustrating you with my foolishness.

 

I don't know if all the playboys think the same way, but everyone comes from different families and has different thoughts, so they must have different views. Look at Khai. I think he's a clone of the Flash. He keeps running, stopping here and there, but never permanently.

 

"What are you thinking?" The person rolling on my bed asks as if he can read my mind.

 

"Nothing."

 

"We've barely seen each other lately. We always split after classes."

 

"We've got our own things to do, I understand. How are Khai and his girlfriend? Haven't heard about them for a while." I no longer feel so hurt that I want to cry every time I talk about this.

 

"Will you be sad if I tell you?"

 

"I've been keeping quite a distance from him. My heart isn't with him anymore."

 

"Um, they're doing well."

 

"Yeah?" I say quietly. I'm glad if he stops at that girl. She's different from everyone, and, considering my dear friend's effort, I suppose things will work just fine. "I would take care of her so well if I got a cute girlfriend like that."

 

"It's the same thing he did with his exes. What's different is our friend is seriously stupid."

 

"How come?"

 

"Ever since that day, he's never brought anyone to his condo."

 

"Though he knows you will never move back."

 

The annual stage play, Likebrary, is about to begin. The general meeting is held at 6 p.m. after classes. Every Comm Arts student who has a part in the production assembles at the meeting place, the faculty auditorium. 

 

Chen, the head leader and director, assigns work to everyone. I sit on the floor with the Extreme Gang. Even though I sit beside Khai, we don't talk, just looking at each other before turning our attention to the person on the stage.

 

“The annual stage play is about to begin. Many of you already knew that we've just finished writing the script. I'm the director, and Name, a fourth-year student, is my assistant. We had Yongyee and Third help us with the script. Give them a round of applause!" 

 

I get up and bend down right away to show appreciation when my fellow Comm Arts students clap for me.

 

"Now I will announce the heads of each team. The heads must choose their own team members. Let's start with the backstage crew." 

 

And then this bear-like senior starts calling out the list of names so long it's like he's chanting a prayer.

 

The faculty will hire professionals to make large-sized backdrops to save time, while students who are good with artwork will make other small props. The fourth-year cheerleaders and a gang of ladyboys volunteer to handle makeup and costumes, their shrieking voices echoing through the auditorium. 

 

The third-year head will be a coordinator, handling the location and related matters. Lots of I-love-eating-so-fucking-much people volunteer to be in the welfare team. Too will be a photographer with a few juniors. Khai and Bone will take charge of lighting and sound.

 

"Jubjang will be the head of the PR team. You have to create a fan page and publicise the play starting today. The photographers or anyone who will take photos during the production process, please send photos to the page to keep the play trending this year."

 

Everyone nods understandingly. Every job has now been assigned, except...

 

"And the last team, Berm!"

 

"Kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! You big bear, my name is Bual." A ladyboy senior howls when the director calls her by the wrong name. His name is Berm, but his stage name is Bua. Damn, I wanna cry.

 

"Right, I'm sorry. Bollocks, oops! I mean Bua will be the head of the casting team and an acting instructor. This will be hard, but I want you to speed it up, or else by the time we've done a workshop, we'll all have grey hair." 

 

Chen's sarcastic tone of voice causes a resentful rumble from the casting team, then someone shouts out from the row.

 

"You can publicise the play tomorrow. The cast will be ready by next week for sure."

 

"That's the spirit. Be sure to cast humans, not ogres like you guys."

 

"Chen, come fight me down here." As the quarrel goes on, I can only laugh at the production team's nonsense and feel tired. It seems like the Likebrary's production team has to work ten times harder than in the past years.

 

"So you've done writing the script?" Someone's deep voice stops my laugh. I remember this voice well even though we don't talk as much as before.

 

"Yeah, but I have to help Bua cast actors."

 

"That's cool. Cast some pretty girls." I scowl at him immediately.

 

"I need to cast people suitable for each character. You only care about prettiness. Why? Want more secret lovers?"

 

"How can I have more when I haven't even had one?"

 

"You're loyal, huh?"

 

"Well… for me, Praew is the only girl who's pretty," he says and gives me a sweet smile, and I smile back at him.

 

If it were before, hearing those words must've caused me unbearable pain. But I feel so light now that I've been through tough times. To say I don't feel anything at all would be a lie. For me, it's not easy to get over him, but it's not like I can't do it, since today...I almost did it.

 

"Why don't you tell her to come and audition?"

 

"No, I'm protective of her."

 

"Got it. Anyone would be protective of their lovers. Good luck with your love. I'm happy for you."

 

"Thanks, man."

 

"I'm leaving now. I gotta talk to Chen a bit about the script."

 

"Go, then." Khai doesn't hold me back, so, after everyone splits, I go another way to avoid an awkward conversation. I probably have to work hard tomorrow as well so that the pain in my heart can be permanently erased...

 

The next morning, public relations about the acting auditions is progressing incredibly well. Posters are displayed on buildings all over campus. Students who are free after classes have to work with their teams without any question. I use this chance to distance myself from the gang and spend my time with the bear-like senior, Chen.

 

One day, then two, two days, then three, and now it's been several days since the Extreme Gang had a meal or hung out together, aside from greeting each other in class. The auditions are going to begin soon. I've spent each free day following the bear-looking Chen to check up on each team.

 

Today is the prop team. Though we hired someone else to make large backdrops, our sponsor didn't give us a big budget, so we asked Architecture students to paint the backdrops on a scaffold.

 

"It's not dry yet, shithole. Move your foot." I frown at my fellow Film student who is holding a paintbrush and yelling at me.

 

"Come here. Don't get in their way." Chen beckons me to stand on the other side. The students up there are painting diligently.

 

"Looks good," I say.

 

"Yeah, Maprang gaped when she came to see it yesterday." Maprang is his girlfriend. She's so pretty that all the guys are on their knees at the sight of her beauty, but she's stupid because she decided to go out with this bear-like human.

 

"How many years have you guys been going out?"

 

"Three."

 

"How did you guys meet? She actually might not have dated a shitty person like you."

 

"Slap your mouth as many times as your age." 

 

I zip my lips immediately. Everyone wants to know about this. Did he force himself on her when they first met?

 

"I know what you're thinking. I didn't punch her stomach and drag her into the toilet."

 

"How did you know? Fucking genius."

 

"I've had a crush on her for a long time, but was too afraid to approach her because the line of the guys trying to hit on her was so long it almost reached England. Now look at my face, and my body."

 

"Then why did she choose you at last?"

 

“I'm good." Fuck me, man. You're not so inspiring. "Actually, I bought her things and took care of her from afar. People feel attached to each other through time. When the time is right, if they love us, then they do, but if they don't, it means even time can't fucking help you."

 

"So it only works in some cases."

 

"Right. Have you ever had a crush on someone?"

 

“…"

 

I hesitate, not answering or denying it.

 

"If you have, then wait for them to love you, but don't wait if they don't. It's a waste of time."

 

"How do I know if I should wait or give up?"

 

"You need to use this." The senior poked his head lightly with his index finger.

 

"Hair?"

 

"Brain, you piece of shit."

 

"Sorry, sorry."

 

"Our bodies have defence mechanisms. Humans have different levels of strength, and we can endure different levels of pain. The pain you feel from waiting hurts your brain. If you can endure it, then you can wait. If you don't, then it means your body can't take it. At that moment, you'll know if you should wait or give up."

 

"Why use our brains? We don't use our hearts to decide on that?"

 

"Let's put it this way. If someone pointed a gun at your head, your brain would tell you to run for your life, but your heart would only pump your blood faster while you stood there waiting for the bullet to bury into your head."

 

"So your brain teaches you to 'survive' the pain while your heart only teaches you to 'know' the pain."

 

"..."

 

"Which one is more fucked up? We can't only use our hearts to love someone. You should defend yourself by using your brain a lot, too." 

 

He pats my shoulder so hard with his big hand and walks away to monitor the work, looking cool. I get why Maprang chose this bear-like human to be her boyfriend. Sometimes, all we need is someone who's strong enough to protect us, someone with a strong brain and a strong heart.

 

Khai has disappeared from the world since Thursday. He texted us that he had to deal with his personal problems, then he didn't show up in classes or contact anyone for the whole weekend.

 

Bone, Too, and I can only guess what he's doing right now, and our guess inclines to his girlfriend. Maybe he was so into his girlfriend that he took her somewhere to be alone together.

 

He doesn't show up on Monday, so we call his family to ask what's going on: is he alive or dead? But then his mother says his beloved son is going on vacation. And he didn't care to tell his friends?!

 

There's no sign of him on Tuesday. After I've finished the faculty's work, I drag myself back to my room with a script for tomorrow's auditions. Am I worried about him? I am, but since I think he's probably hanging out with his girlfriend, I feel less uneasy.

 

Ever since I learned to use my brain more, I've gotten stronger. I really have to thank Chen.

 

I plop on my bed with my face down, exhausted from all the work I put my effort into. I don't know when I've fallen asleep. Before I know it, the sky has gone dark, no light in my room. I get myself up and get out of bed to fumble for a light switch.

 

Clack!

 

"What the heck?!!" I shout in shock when the light is suddenly turned on and see someone spinning around on a swivel chair.

 

Fuck, I thought it was a ghost.

 

"How did you come here?" I ask, my mind racing. Seeing Khai's expressionless, handsome face, I can't help getting anxious. Is this his spirit in the form of a visible shape?

 

"I'm not dead. Why do you have to look so shocked?" He says evenly, hand holding up a stack of paper. It's the script that will be used to cast actors for this year's play.

 

"That's my script."

 

"Did you come up with the male lead's characteristics?"

 

"No, Chen did. Don't change the subject. How did you come into my room?" I walk back to my bed and sit down slowly, trying to be as calm as possible.

 

"Too gave me this." Too, you trash! I didn't give you another keycard just so you could give it to anybody else!

 

"Where have you been for the past several days?"

 

"I was reflecting on myself."

 

"_" I don't say a word, letting him finish his story.

 

"Third, how long has it been since the last time we had a proper conversation?" 

 

I don't quite understand his point. He'd sometimes act strange and unpredictable or even disappear out of the blue. And when he decides to come back, well, it's as you've just seen. To be honest, I can't really keep up with his mood.

 

"Dunno. I don't remember."

 

"Since I introduced Praew to you, right?"

 

"Actually, no. We both had our own things to do."

 

"Third... right now..."

 

"I broke up with her."

 

Those simple words came out of that beautiful mouth. I sat there, stunned. Seeing how he doesn't look hurt at all, I don't know how to react. I'd normally get up to pat his shoulder and tell him it's okay, but now I just sit there, doing nothing.

 

"Why so fast?" That girl seemed to get along with him better than his exes did.

 

"I just realised what a scumbag I am."

 

You should've known that long ago, but I don't say it; I don't want to hurt him.

 

"You found a new girl, huh?"

 

"Not quite." 

 

For Khai, there are only a few reasons to find a new girl or get bored with the current one. 

 

"I look at girls like toys, thinking we just have sex. It's a win-win, and that's all." He pauses for a moment, then he looks at me

 

"Go on, I'm listening."

 

"I get bored easily. I want to try things without commitment. I had sex with many girls, but you know what? We became strangers the next day anyway."

 

"Because you never stop."

 

"I guess so." 

 

Silence fills my room again. Several moments pass by, and he speaks again in his deep voice. "Hey! This part is good. I like it."

 

"It's a bit cheesy."

 

"Did you write this part?"

 

"Um."

 

"Can I read it out?"

 

I frown at him, looking at the big hands holding the white paper. He tries to read every word I typed down.

 

"This is how my face and body look, so I probably can't change myself much for you. I don't have much money in my account, so I probably can't buy you expensive things, but I'll make up for it by giving you something useful."

 

"I'm not a genius; I'm actually quite stupid, but I'll use all of my skills to take care of you as best as I can."

 

"..."

 

I wrote this part from my deepest feelings, even though the words were spoken by the male character.

 

"Can you believe that no matter how many people come into your life, you will always see me look at you right here?"

 

"Khai, I think..."

 

"Can you believe that no matter how many people come into my life, I will always see 'you' look at me right here?"

 

The pronouns are switched, changing the sentence's meaning. The word 'look at' makes me feel warm inside.

 

Khai and I are friends. I don't know if the previous sentence implied anything or if he just tried to read out that simple, cheesy sentence, but right now, at this moment...Neither he nor I can keep our eyes off each other.

 

The acting auditions have begun. Many students are interested and come to apply for the roles. We even need extra chairs for the students outside the auditorium. Bua, the casting team, and I have prepared thoroughly to cast actors who are best suited to each role.

 

We held the auditions at the small auditorium. We're casting three people at a time for each role, starting with the female lead, then the male lead, then other supporting characters.

 

"Ooooooooh, there are lots of pretty girls. That's the BA's princess. That's Dent's princess. And that's the Law's princess. Fuck, dude!"  Too says from time to time. He looks so happy to have witnessed the beautiful flowers gathering outside, because when he's done taking photos of the casting team, he immediately runs outside with his camera.

 

Your happiness is right there, Too. He got so excited that he brought two extra memory cards today. Damn... you fucking pervert.

 

Bone and Khai are no better. They snatch the welfare team's duty today by distributing refreshments to the candidates. They must have forgotten that they take charge of lighting and sound! But I don't have much time to care about them because the first three girls have come into the room.

 

"Introduce yourself," Berm, the leader of the auditions, says on a microphone.

 

"Hello, I'm Cha, Nicha, from the Faculty of Engineering, majoring in Chemistry."

 

"Do you have a position? Or talents? Please show us."

 

"I'm the second-year Engineering princess. My talents are singing and playing the guitar."

 

"Before we start with the script, please sing for us."

 

The audition goes on. Bone and Khai want to be involved, so they take their own chairs to sit beside me. They must really want to watch the junior so much that their crotches itch. And Too? No need to ask. His zoom lens is about to hit the princess' nose bridge.

 

Many girls have entered the room, demonstrating the acting skills suitable for the role. Some of them are good with lines and have the look we're looking for, but none of them is outstanding until another three girls come into the room.

 

"So daaaaamn pretty. Third will definitely choose this girl." Bone's voice, reaching my ears from time to time, starts to annoy me. He's been predicting the result with Khai for a while now, and they don't seem to stop anytime soon.

 

"No, no. Another girl. That one." Khai purses his lip at the ninth girl, the one I've been looking at the moment she walked in. She has the perfect look for this character.

 

"What are you thinking? Tell me." Bone pokes me.

 

"Shut up, both of you."

 

"Let's try out this scene. The male lead will sing the theme song to hit on you, and this is the conversation." 

 

Bua holds out the script to the sixth girl. My two dear friends start discussing quietly, but they're bugging me so fucking much.

 

"The Oasis song? So fucking old."

 

“Wonderwall, Third's favourite." Khai always knows what I like. Sometimes it feels nice to know that our friendship is partly built up with attention.

 

"You chose this song?" Bone asks me.

 

"Yeah."

 

"If it were a lottery, Khai would already win."

 

"Winning a lottery isn't as surprising as sleeping with me."

 

"Sorry, guys. Can you pay attention to the front? I'm fucking annoyed." After I cussed at them, these two Extremes stopped speaking. 

 

Finally, the one who gets the most votes is the girl Khai predicted. Edu's cheerleader, number nine, will be the female lead. Even though we haven't officially announced it, the high scores on each candidate's papers stop them from being too excited about the result.

 

After the audition for the female lead is done, here comes the audition for the male lead. Of course, this audition has attracted all the faculty's princes and cheerleaders, including all the handsome guys on campus, to be here. 

 

We stick to the same process: they have to act out the assigned scenes. The bear-like director is the one who came up with the male lead's characteristics, but he didn't come here today, so our hopes rest with the rest of us.

 

The audition proceeds until break time, then ends. We still can't choose and have to discuss it.

 

"Many of them can act but have no charm at all." I can only listen quietly, letting the experienced ones make comments.

 

"That's what I'm thinking. "Trin' is a playboy, a real flirt."

 

"Um, I think the one suitable for this role must really be a scumbag from the inside. He gotta have that inner feeling." Woah… the male lead is not a scumbag. He's just a playboy. The seniors get it all mixed up.

 

"We can't choose. They're handsome, but we really can't choose."

 

"Should we select one person for now? He might get better after the workshop."

 

"They don't fit the role. They all look like nice guys. How can they play the role of a shitty dude? Oops!" Bua pauses as if she's seen the heaven's gate. Every pair of eyes follows Bua's voice and stops at the tall figure on a chair who is touching his phone's screen like crazy right now.

 

"Khaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaai."

 

"Huh? What's up?" You're done for, dickhead, and you don't even realise it.

 

"What's your job in the production?"

 

"Lighting and sound."

 

"Let someone take care of that. Now come take this script and read it."

 

"Why? I take charge of sound, not dubbing."

 

"No, no. I just want you to audition for this role. Where the hell is Prim, anyway? She's disappeared after the audition of handsome dudes. Third, act out the scene with him."

 

"Huh? What did you say?"

 

"Help your friend, please." I sat there for a moment, confused. Khai pulls my wrist to get me up, and I follow him to the front of the casting team's table. Bua hands me a piece of paper to skim. In this scene, the female lead asks the male lead questions to help him choose between two options. And why the hell do I have to be the female lead? Prim, where the fuck are you?!

 

"Khai, are you done reading the script?"

 

"Yes."

 

"And Third?"

 

"I'll read it out."

 

"Whatever, I'll focus on Khai." I take a deep breath, look at the letters typed in Cordia New, size 16, in my hand, and then I start reading the script aloud.

 

"Trin, can I ask you something?"

 

"Sure."

 

Why do I feel like a little teenage girl?

 

"If you could choose between the sun and the moon, what would you choose?"

 

"I'd choose the sun so that I could see you clearly," Khai says the line correctly, and the way he's looking at me right now gives me goosebumps.

 

"What about time and money?"

 

"Time. I'd spent it with you."

 

"A reality and a dream?"

 

"A reality, because you'd be there."

 

"Eat and sleep?"

 

"Sleep. At least I could see you in my dream."

 

"What about me and sleep? What would you choose?" Here comes the last line for this scene. Trin will choose the female lead, so I look up from the letters to listen to the answer clearly.

 

"Sleep."

 

"Fuck, you got it wrong. Do over."

 

"..."

 

I get myself together and ask the question again, "What about me and sleep? What would you choose?™

 

"If I had to choose between you and sleep, I'd choose sleep."

 

".."

 

"Sleep with you."

 

BOOM!!

JUST KILL ME AND LET ME DIE IN PAIN.

 

And Khai's random line made him the male lead, ever so randomly. Bua and the gang screamed so loud their throats could break after Khai came up with that 'sleep with you.' 

 

His dazzling silver tongue made everyone throw their votes at him unquestionably. The second wave of shock hits me when the unexpected guest comes to audition. Praew, Khai's ex-girlfriend.

 

She walks right into the room with a bright smile and answers our questions eloquently, and so she gets the role of the female lead's best friend without any objection. I know it'll be awkward for Khai and Praew, but I can't help him with this.

 

We announce the results as soon as the auditions are over because the production team will inform the cast about practice and other schedules within the next hour. The workshop alone will take the whole three months, so, without further ado, an icebreaking activity will start right away.

 

I don't have any part in this, so I just sit on the floor, leaning against the wall stupidly, looking at the cast jumping around joyfully. Time has passed, and now it's evening. Too is still busy taking photos, Bone is gone, and Khai is participating in the activity with the cast, so I don't know who I should mess around with. I don't even dare move during recess and just play on my phone to kill time.

 

Many of the cast are lying on the floor while the welfare team works hard, distributing refreshments to everyone. Soon the fresh male lead walks towards me, plops his butt down beside me, and hands me a snack and a box of orange juice.

 

"For me? Thanks.” I received them so that he won't feel hurt, but I don't eat them. Maybe it's because he always takes care of everyone, so I don't want to get ahead of myself and put myself in a risky situation.

 

"Hurry up and eat."

 

"Not hungry."

 

"Someone will take them away."

 

"You gave them to many people. Why nagging?"

 

"You've been tired all day."

 

"You, too."

 

"What do you wanna eat? I'll go buy it for you."

 

"I don't wanna eat anything." I turn aside and play on my phone to change the topic.

 

"What are you playing?"

 

"ROV."

 

"I wanna play it."

 

"I'm gonna play it. You go back to the activity. It's started." 

 

Why has he been acting weird lately? Ever since the day he showed up in my room, the awkward atmosphere has gone. I don't want to think that this might be a situation where still water runs deep, which, as time passes, will form big waves surging into my heart.

 

I don't want to get my hopes up just because he's sometimes nice to me anymore. He doesn't pester me, and soon he stops bothering me and joins the activity that lasts for hours. The person who has nothing to do, like me, can't help but feel drowsy. At last, I can't bear the drowsiness and lie down on the floor, falling asleep.

 

When I wake up, the timepieces on the clock point at nine and twelve. Faaaaak, it's 9 p.m. I didn't wake up because of loud noise or anything, but my stomach was growling.

 

I watch the cast as they get to know each other and participate in the activity. Too is engrossed in taking photos with Bone as his assistant, sort of. Looking at them working so hard, how can I ask them to have a meal with me?

 

It seems like luck is on my side when I see the snack and juice Khai gave me a few hours ago next to me, and now there's a food box, too. I want to thank the welfare team so much. Their hard work almost brings me to tears. 

 

I open the food box and start eating happily, and then they call it a day. Yeeeeeeees. Let's leave, guys. This is boring. It sucks waiting for all of you like a fool like this.

 

Everyone starts getting their own stuff and leaves. I go to the restroom first because I drank a whole bottle of water. When I walk outside, I run into the pretty girl I've been trying to avoid.

 

"Oh.Hi, Praew." I greet her hesitantly.

 

"Hi, Third. It's been a while." I understand this awkwardness, and I'm just Khai's best friend. Khai had to participate in the activity with his ex-girlfriend. I can't imagine how terrible he'd feel.

 

"Yeah."

 

"How are you?"

 

"Good. What about you?" It's a stupid question, but I can't think of anything else.

 

"Pretty good."

 

"It's late. My boyfriend's probably here to pick me up now." She looks at her watch as she says that. Wait! Did she say her boyfriend was here to pick her up? Don't tell me they broke up because she had someone else? Why was everything so fast?

 

"You have a new boyfriend?"

 

"We've been together for a long time."

 

"..."  What the fuck? I'm confused.

 

"Um. Please don't tell Khai."

 

"About what?"

 

"Khai asked me to help him. Actually.."

 

"We've never dated."

 

Praew walks away, leaving a dumb idiot scratching his head nonstop. What does that sentence mean? Praew and Khai, they've never dated in the first place? What was the reason why he had to lie to his friends?

 

Lots of questions are spinning around in my head. I walk back to the auditorium where my three best friends are waiting, but I don't speak a word about Praew. I keep it to myself, figuring out the reason on my own.

 

In the darkness of my bedroom, I'm still thinking about what I heard an hour ago. I want to ask Khai, but I don't have the courage because it's probably none of my business. But I also think I was one of the people he deceived, and that Khai has the explanation.

 

Rrrrr.!

Speaking of the devil, he's calling me.

 

"What's up?"

 

[There are lots of photos uploaded on the page]

 

"What page?"

 

[The stage play's page.] You called me to talk about the page? He's getting more and more ridiculous every day.

 

"Um...so what?"

[There's a photo of you.]

 

"Do I have to be excited?"

[Okay, I won't bother you anymore. See you tomorrow. Good night.]

 

"Khai," I say his name, wanting to ask the question stuck in my head, but I'm too afraid to ask at last, even when he's quiet, waiting for me to speak.

 

[What is it, Third?]

"Nothing. Good night."

 

He hangs up. I roll around on my bed, lost in thought. After a while, I remembered what Khai said and opened the stage play's page. 

 

We announced the cast today. Each of them made cool postures with some dope captions to pull people's attention, but then..."Shit!" I cuss so loud when I see a picture of me eating from the food box, looking so happy. And the caption is so crazy that I can't help but think 'Who the fuck came up with that?!"

 

LakornNitade

 

If I had to choose between you and eat, I'd choose 'eat'

 

...Eat you up.

 

#eatinglover #scriptwritingteam