Chapter 30. Warmer in Winter - Part 1.
"Hehe, I didn't sleep well last night," I replied, handing over the money to pay for the barbecue. "I'll go first. Bye." I said goodbye to my aunt and went back to my room. A lot of people said hello and said I always looked sleepy. "Oh, I'm always tired." I went back to my room, sat down, and started eating the sticky rice and grilled meat I'd bought earlier.
Have you heard that those who sleep less live less? It's true. Suffering from insomnia, I've started to forget. Although I've been forgetful in the past, my brain hasn't been functioning at its best. If that's true, how long can I live, Fan?
Today I have no other activities than waiting for Phi Fah, so I continue reading books. I'm not a brilliant student, unlike Phi Fah and Phi Fah. But because I want to be praised, I've tried my hardest this whole time. Fah always says that hard work will never let us down. If we're not as good as others, we have to try harder. These good values are the result of patience and commitment.
"Where do you like it? Choose what you like best, Phoon."
"I like them both."
"Then take them both."
"No, my money isn't enough for that."
"I'll buy it for you. Take both."
"No, I'm not feeling well," I said, frowning slightly. We're shopping for a trip abroad. After some hesitation about where to go, Japan was a good choice to start with because it wasn't too far away. When I think of Japan, I think of a gift I received many years ago, addressed to "Ren." We all make assumptions, and the most reasonable thing is that my mother named her "Ren." In Japanese,
"Ren" means "lotai." Although this hypothesis is uncertain, I like it. I'm planning a week-long trip.
It's not ideal to stay until New Year's Eve so that Phi Fah can spend it with his family.
Spending time with family is the best way to start the new year. We decided to go in mid-December because it wasn't the holiday season yet. There will be fewer people and more opportunities to take beautiful photos without too much competition. Even if there are people, it won't be too crowded.
“Now I understand what Johan feels,” Phi Fah said.
"What?" I turned to look at him. Phi Fah was waiting for me to pick out a sweater. "Did I keep you waiting too long? I'm almost done."
"No, you don't have to feel guilty about accepting anything. I want to buy you everything," Phi Fah said with a smile. "Take those two sweaters."
"All right?"
"Yes, just take it."
"Okay..." I agreed and put the two sweaters in the basket. I understand what he means when he says he feels guilty for accepting something. North talks about it often. In the past, I thought North cared too much about Phi Jo, but now I understand. In a relationship, you don't want to be a burden to your partner. But it's hard to turn down Phi Fah.
"Is there anything else you would like?"
"Good." I smiled shyly. "Besides the clothes, I want a new lens for my camera."
"Landed?"
"Yes, for travel. There are new models available."
Pay for this first, and then we'll take a look.
"Yes," I replied happily. The mere thought of going to the camera store excites me. When I have free time, I like to browse the camera section to see what's new or decide what to buy next.
I like to take my camera everywhere. Since I've been with Phi Fah, I've taken a lot of photos, especially during our trip to Phuket. Finally, I bought new lenses to take to Japan and paid for them myself. I didn't let Phi Fah pay for them, since he already does a lot for me. After purchasing them, we went home. There's not much to do at Phi Fah's house; it feels like home. We ate with my uncles, which was very good, and I got used to it quickly.
"Are you bored? There's not much to do here."
"No," I shook my head as I looked at the groceries. "I feel comfortable here."
Phi Fah's house is very welcoming.
"Then why don't you move here?"
"What?"
"Oh, seriously standardized"
"Do you want me to move here?"
"After we get married, of course."
"I mean, Phi Fah. Wait a minute. Are you trying to embarrass me again?" I turned to look at Phi Fah, who frowned slightly. Phi Fah smiled.
"No, but if you are ashamed, I will consider
"This is an advantage."
"What are you talking about?"
"Or would you rather build a new house for us?"
"I don't know." I turned my head to look at the stuff. The goods were right in front of me.
"It's still a long way off, okay?"
"Hmm, it's not bad to talk about it because we'll be together anyway."
"Oh." I remained silent as a warm feeling spread through my heart. It's wonderful when someone talks to me about the future. "If you travel with me, I want to stay here beside you, and I can be close to my uncle and aunt."
"Hmm. Have you ever thought about having a child?"
"Um. No, but I'm thinking about it."
"Yes, what do you think?"
"I think we should adopt a cute baby. But unfortunately, I'm a man," I said, sighing.
"Come here."
"What's the problem?"
"Come here right now." I slowly got up from the floor because I was sitting and putting my things away.
I approached Phi Fah, and he pulled me onto his lap. Instinctively, I screamed in shock.
"W-what is this?"
"I just hugged my baby. You seem to be thinking strange things."
"I don't think it's strange, I'm just saying it would be a shame if it didn't happen."
"Wait ten minutes, this guy's going to think weird. Do you believe in Phi Fah?" Phi Fah asked in a deep voice, speaking close to my ear before gently kissing my cheek.
"W-what. Yeah, interesting. Okay, if we have a kid, I'd like him to be like Phi Fah."
"Why?"
"So that our children won't be like me."
"Right, it's better not to be like Phoon. Otherwise, I won't be able to follow the behaviour of two nice people like you."
"Phi Fah!" I called softly, unconsciously. I wanted to hit him on the arm because I was annoyed by someone so good at seducing and teasing. "I can't have children."
"But if we try, who knows? We might be able to."
"Hey!" I accidentally hit his hand once, but the blow was so light I barely felt it. "What are you trying to do? You're studying to be a doctor. Everyone knows men can't get pregnant."
"So, let Phi Fah be first.
"Do you want to try?"
"That's enough. I don't want to talk to you anymore."
"You're ashamed and want to avoid it."
"I won't run away. I want to wash my clothes."
"Let the waitress do it."
"Okay. But I want to take off my clothes.
"Then let me go now," I said, trying to get up, but I was held back. "Phi Fah, I'm serious. If I don't hurry, my clothes might not dry. The weather's nice."
"Why should I give in just because of this?"
"I want to wash my clothes."
"No, stay here with me."
"Eh," I muttered, frowning slightly, before he hugged me tighter. But when I remembered we were in the living room, I tried to get up, worried someone might see us.
"Someone might see. Everyone's working, so someone has to come and tidy up."
"Nobody's coming."
"How do you know?"
"You probably already know the answer," Phi Fah said, resting his chin on my shoulder. His relaxed attitude made me stop trying to get up, so we stayed like that. I love being held by Phi Fah. I've heard that the scent of a loved one can be calming. It's true.
"Hi Fah."
"YES."
"What do other people think of our relationship?"
"Why?"
"I just want to know if your friends will accept me."
"Why don't they accept you? They already know you."
"What did they say?"
"They didn't say anything. They just said we're finally together."
"Do they already know? Know what?"
"They know about those letters."
"What? Does everyone know?"
"YES."
“What? Ter and North helped me keep a secret,” I said, frowning.
All our efforts to keep the secret were in vain. Ter and North should be ashamed, as I am. We thought we'd deceived them, but they knew everything and pretended not to know.
“They like to joke,” I said, a little annoyed.
"This isn't a joke. Don't you want me to know, or do you want me to ask?"
This will be bad too. You shouldn't know that."
"I do not know."
"'I don't know'... the truth is you're just pretending not to know."
"I only found out after my birthday, and it was too late."
"Yes, at first I thought maybe you'd guess it from the first letter, but Dao said you wouldn't try to find out."
"Dao, your friend from the club?"
"Yes, I haven't introduced you to him. But it seems Phi Hill has already spoken to him."
"Invite him to dinner."
"He's good, but he doesn't have much free time. He's working now."
We continued chatting until the afternoon, when my uncle and aunt returned for dinner. Afterwards, we got ready for an early night. After showering, I sat on the bed next to Phi Fah. As soon as he saw me, he immediately hugged me. Not because I'm used to it, but I'm still surprised by how much he loves Phi Fah. I like him, even though I still feel very awkward. Subconsciously, I moved closer to him, enjoying his scent and his warmth. Shortly after, I fell asleep.
I woke up sleepily in the dark room. I grabbed my phone and checked the time: it was 4:00 AM. I set my alarm for 5:00 AM because we're going to Japan today. Our flight leaves at 9:00 AM, and we'll arrive in Narita around 3:00 PM. Japan is two hours ahead of Thailand, so we'll arrive around 5:00 AM local time.
I've planned a few things for this trip, but since we'll be there for a week, we can decide more once we get there. I wanted to get up and take a shower, but Phi Fah hugged me, so I didn't dare move. Phi Fah is easy to wake. His warm breath on my neck made me stiff. Slowly, I turned around so as not to wake him. My eyes are adjusting to the darkness, and I'm looking at his sleeping face.
I never thought I'd see him like this.
I smiled to myself.
I raised my hand and touched his face, his cheeks, and his nose. How could someone be so perfect? When God created you, did he pay special attention to you? As I pondered, his hand took mine and kissed it softly. His eyes slowly opened, and he looked at me.
"Ah... uh."
"Are you going to keep staring at me like that?"
His deep voice broke the silence, and a faint smile appeared on his lips. I felt nervous when I realised he'd been awake for a while. "Why didn't you wake me?"
"Because it's not time yet," I replied. At that moment, the alarm went off. I realised I'd woken up at four, so I'd been staring at it for almost an hour.
What a pity!
"Punctual."
“Why do you pretend to be asleep when you’re awake?” I asked, frowning.
"I just woke up."
"Truly?"
"Yes," Phi Fah replied. "Good morning."
"Good morning," I replied. I watched him wake up and turn on the lights, which illuminated the room.
"Are you very excited? You woke up before the alarm went off."
“I’ve never been so excited,” I replied as I turned off my phone’s alarm.
"What time is it?"
"Five."
"It's still morning."
"I'm excited. You can rest a little longer."
"No, I'm awake."
"Did I wake you?"
"Yes, it's like a cat is playing with me."
“Ah! You’re sleeping, so the cat has to scratch your face,” I replied, making Phi Fah laugh.
He likes to call me cat, and while I'm a little embarrassed, I realise it's okay if he likes it. Suddenly, Phi Fah pinched my nose and shook it back and forth.
“What are you doing?” I asked, frowning.
“I was teasing the cat,” he replied.
I didn't answer; I just looked at him, annoyed. Finally, Phi Fah told me to take a shower first. After the shower, I saw him on the balcony and joined him.
"The sun's almost rising," I commented, admiring the view. For me, the sky at sunrise is more beautiful than at sunset. I immediately grabbed my camera to take some photos. Once I'd had enough, I put it down and looked at Phi Fah.
Who's still looking at the sun?
“Phi Fah,” he called to me.
"YES."
"Can I take your picture?"
"No?"
"YES."
"I'm not dressed to be photographed," he said. But in a white T-shirt and pants, he's already quite handsome. He doesn't need anything else.
"It doesn't matter, it's just for me."
"Ah, I see?"
"Yes," I nodded quickly. Phi Fah smiled slightly before nodding in agreement. "When we go to Japan, I need to take lots of pictures of you."
"You already have plenty."
“Never enough,” I smiled.
After taking the photo, Phi Fah showered and got dressed. Then we went downstairs to have breakfast and got ready to go to the airport. When I arrived, I just noticed that Phi Fah had booked a first-class seat. Since he's in charge of the ticket, I don't ask much, just the flight time. It's my first time sitting in first-grade class, and I'm both excited and nervous.
“I’m excited,” I said to Phi Fah, sitting next to me.
“I know,” he replied.
"We can order a regular chair. It's very expensive."
"Well, I've never flown economy class, so that's unthinkable. If you want, next time we can order a regular seat," Phi Fah said. I was silent for a moment. I didn't think about it.
"Fine, whatever you like," I replied. If Phi Fah always travels first class, I can't ask him to sit in economy. "Oh, I haven't checked the inn yet."
"I did it."
"Have you booked a hotel in Tokyo?"
"Yes, before it ends."
“Uh, thanks,” I replied with a big smile.
We spent several hours on the plane, and before we knew it, we landed. As soon as I stepped off the plane, the cold air immediately hit me. I know winter in Japan can be harsh, but I couldn't have imagined it until I experienced it firsthand.
"P-Phi Fah, I want to go home," I said jokingly, my voice shaking as I hugged myself. Phi Fah, who was carrying our things, turned to me. We hadn't brought much because Phi Fah had said it was better to buy things here, so there was room to bring more home later.
"We haven't even been here ten minutes."
"No, I'm not strong. Phuket has never been this cold."
"Do you want to wear another jacket?"
"Now I'm like Michelin," I replied, making him laugh. "Have you ever been here when it was this cold?"
"No, I was only in Japan during the summer."
"What kind of summer is it here?"
"Even cooler than Thailand.
The atmosphere is enchanting."
"I've seen some photos; Japan in the summer is really beautiful," I said, looking at Phi Fah, who was wearing two layers of clothing, a backpack, and a black face mask. An idea came to mind, so I quickly approached. "The first photo at the airport."
“Hmm?” Before he could answer, I quickly snapped a photo, leaving him no time to prepare.
"Okay, thanks." Phi Fah didn't say anything; he just smiled at me. Even though he was wearing a mask, I could see his smile, and my heart beat a little faster. Why am I so happy? We decided to take the train. In Japan, experiencing the train seems mandatory. Phi Fah went to buy the tickets, while I waited nearby.
"I already have my ticket. The train will arrive in about twenty minutes."
"Do you speak Japanese or English?" I asked curiously.
"In Japanese."
“Wow, you can speak Japanese?” I said, surprised.
"A bit."
"Fantastic," I praised him. He smiled slightly, unashamed of my compliments. We waited for the train to arrive. We couldn't find any free seats, so we had to stand.
I moved to the back, while Phi Fah stood beside me. I carefully observed the landscape.
Soon after, the train got crowded, but I didn't feel desperate thanks to Phi Fah, who protected me. The closer people are, the closer we are. My heart beats faster because I'm so close to him.
"I am sorry."
"Everything's fine. Are you okay?"
"Yes," I replied without looking at him. Phi Fah was watching over me. Soon, the train began to move, and I looked out the window, thrilled by the unfamiliar landscape.
When the train stopped at a station, my body swayed slightly, but Phi Fah held my head to prevent me from hitting the pole.
"Sorry, did I hurt you?" I asked worriedly. Phi Fah shook his head.
"Be careful."
"Oh, sorry. Does it hurt? Let me see your hand," I said, taking it to check. There were no red marks or wounds.
“Everything’s fine,” he replied in his distinctive baritone voice, his eyes full of warmth and attention.
"I'll be more careful."
"Okay. Oh, there's an empty seat. Do you want to sit?"
"No, it's fine," I replied, looking in the direction Phi Fah was pointing. Someone had just gotten off, leaving an empty seat.
"We have to stay a little longer. Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm fine," I replied. More and more people boarded the train, and soon it started moving again. I stopped looking out the window and tried to be more alert. There were many students around us. They looked like they hadn't had a day off yet. I noticed a few girls staring at me. Oh, I see. With someone as attractive as Phi Fah in front of me, it's no surprise people were noticing him. Plus, he's quite tall, about 6 feet 11 inches, as I'd asked him once. I'm curious to know what they're talking about.
Even though I heard it, I couldn't understand it because I didn't speak Japanese.
We need time to get to our destination. Honestly, I feel exhausted. Moving a little, I feel better. When I got off the train on the platform, I was about to ask Phi Fah where we were going, but I saw four girls in school uniforms talking to him.
I stopped a little ways away, observing. They seemed excited and happy, all taking out their cell phones to talk and smile. Phi Fah listened with a slight smile, but shook his head. Then, one of them said something, and Phi Fah responded in Japanese before approaching me.
"Come on."
“What happened?” I asked as I walked.
"They want to take a picture with me."
"So what did the other one ask again?"
"Ah, they asked me if I was an actor or an artist from somewhere."
“Oh,” I replied, extending the word.
"So what did you say?"
"I said no, then I said goodbye."
"I understand." I nodded. It's rare for a foreigner to consider someone an actor or artist.
"Have you ever thought about becoming an actor?" I asked.
"Why do you ask me?"
"You're very popular. Has anyone ever contacted you?"
"Once, but it's not something I'm interested in."
"Why not?"
"It's not something I want to do. And other people think so too."
"Do you mean all the other doctors?"
"YES."
I nodded, understanding. Given their beauty, it's no wonder they were approached. And it's no wonder they refused. It's also surprising that they refuse. The sky is getting darker, and the air is getting colder. We took a taxi to the hotel.
"With this cold air, will it snow?"
"I'm not sure."
I nodded, though I hoped it hadn't fallen yet. The air was cold enough for my taste. The taxi dropped us off in front of a large hotel, and I was impressed by its size. I don't even want to imagine the price.