PAYBACK BOOK 1.

Chapter 10.

I know that university classes aren't all-day like in high school. If I just barged into university haphazardly, I might not run into him. But if I called first, there would be a higher chance that Han-Soo would intentionally avoid me so that we wouldn't meet. So I prepared to wait for a couple of hours and headed back to the same room we had been in before. But I didn't need to wait at all. At ten o'clock in the morning, I thought no one would be home, so I opened the door, half-giving up. But there was someone there. 

 

A man was sleeping. He was curled up like a baby, fast asleep on the narrow two-person sofa. The moment I saw that half of his face was Han-Soo, I stepped forward. He seemed to be sleeping so soundly, completely unaware. Even when I walked noisily closer, he didn't stir. Standing in front of him, I could smell a faint scent of alcohol. He's going to be hard to wake up, I thought, as I lifted my feet.

 

Wing! Crash!

Pouty face

 

The moment he kicked hard, the sofa slid across the floor with a loud bang, and Han-Soo's body jolted from the sudden tremor, causing him to open his eyes.

 

"...Uh, what was that...?"

 

Wings! Squeak!

 

"Aargh!"

 

The sofa, which was nudged a second time, slid further away, causing him to bounce up in surprise.

 

"Uh...who is it?... Huh?"

 

Han-Soo lay on top of one side of his head, causing his face to swell and his eyes to be half-closed. He looked at me with a dark, vacant expression before freezing like ice.

 

"Why are you here...?"

 

He probably couldn't move his mouth properly because he had just woken up, making his pronunciation unclear. I glanced down at him before lifting my foot again, but before I could kick, for the third time, Han-Soo stood up, letting out a loud gasp.

 

"What are you doing?!"

 

Han-Soo hurriedly stood up, stumbling slightly before letting out a loud cry. I looked at him, now fully awake, and stated the purpose of his visit.

 

"Let's talk."

 

"Then let's just talk. Why drag the sofa around...?"

 

Wing! Crash!

The empty sofa tipped over with a loud bang from the force of my kick. I looked at Han-Soo, who was standing there with his mouth agape and frozen, as he spoke again.

 

"Tell them to come talk to me."

 

Then, he turned to look at me with a serious expression.

 

"...What are we talking about?"

 

"Six o'clock in the evening at the x* art gallery."

 

After telling him the time and place and turning to walk away, he quickly called out to me.

 

"What are you talking about? I have nothing to discuss, and I don't want to go," he said, looking at his sulky face before slowly scanning the classroom.

 

"I've stayed at a university like this for a few days before, even if it was a different university. While looking for someone, I just sat around the university where the medical students are. That guy was in class when he went on a rampage, causing a huge mess. The other students rushed in and started fighting. I broke one of them to show them an example, but nobody dared to report it. Not a single police officer, because I have the students' addresses in that region. If I try again, there's nothing I can't do."

 

I repeated it to him, his eyes widening in shock once again.

 

"6 PM at the xx Art Gallery"

 

I've visited several drama sets through one of the classes I took. Even though it was to see the surroundings like any other audience member, it was enough to realise that what was seen on television was only the tip of the iceberg. The actors on the monitor were surrounded by dozens of people and various pieces of filming equipment. I don't know what each person's role was, but it seemed like a considerable amount of preparation time was needed, considering the large number of people involved. 

 

Furthermore, I learned that even after filming, they still have to repeat the scene with different cameras, making the actual performance take much longer than the time shown on screen. So even though the schedule said filming started at 5 PM, I think Myungshin didn't start filming until after that. And I was right. By the time Myungshin arrived at a quiet outdoor filming location on a weekday afternoon, it was already almost six o'clock, the time he had arranged with Han-Soo.

 

I watched him from a distance as he arrived and started putting on makeup, before my phone rang. Seeing that it was Han-Soo’s number, which I had just saved, I almost lost interest. A smile spread across my face. He said he'd quit everything, but it seems he hasn't deleted my phone number yet. As soon as I answered the call, I heard Han-Soo’s voice.

 

"...I've arrived."

 

Judging from his harsh tone, he had probably seen the filming here and seemed angry that I deliberately called him to a place where cameras were located.

 

"Wait at the restroom behind the annex building."

 

I heard him say something, but I hung up the phone before I could answer. Then I walked closer to where Myungshin was and held the drink I had just gotten. I then took the pre-prepared card out of my pocket.

 

"Excuse me."

 

After calling over a nearby staff member, he pointed at Myungshin.

 

"I'm a fan. Could you please give this to him?"

 

The staff probably found the young boy's sweet, pink card amusing, so they accepted it along with the drink. I hid around the corner of the building and watched him walk in. Myungshin, who was getting his hair done after finishing his makeup, noticed a staff member and looked up. After a moment, the staff member said something to Myungshin with a smile as he accepted the gift. He was probably explaining that a man who claimed to be a fan had given him the gift.

 

I knew it was something that would make Myungshin happy, and I guessed exactly that he would read the card first. Once the pink-clad card was opened, I turned and walked away without looking back. Even without looking, I knew he must have made a terrifyingly grumpy face afterwards, because the message on the card was completely unexpected.

 

'I have evidence that you colluded with the cameraman to ruin my play. If you don't want this to spread online and ruin your reputation, come to the restroom behind the annex building.'

 

"Alone, right now."

 

After the art gallery closed, only the film crew remained inside. Therefore, it's unlikely anyone would have gone to the restrooms behind the annex building, which are far from the film set. As Youngshin walked towards me, I followed his brisk steps, slowly clutching a card in one hand. Seeing Myungsin's figure disappear into the building with the restrooms, he slowed his pace. One of the two wouldn't suddenly rush out, would they? There was one person who had so much to say. Standing by the open entrance, they could hear the loud chatter from inside without even straining to listen.

 

"Damn it, the internet? Go ahead and post something. I don't know what evidence you have, but I'm not scared at all. You idiot, you're so stiff with fear!"

 

"Are you going to use the cameras to threaten me? How dare you! Do you want to die?"

 

"What are you suddenly talking about? I'm waiting for someone here."

 

Han-Soo, equally flustered, spoke in a low voice as if remembering something. It was as if he had vaguely noticed something about Myungshin's appearance. Whose doing was it that he was waiting for me? The moment Han-Soo stopped speaking, Myungshin 's cursing grew even louder.

 

"You little dog, if you dare call me again, know this: it won't just be a cameraman, I'll send thugs with knives to deal with you. Do you understand? Be thankful that we knew each other before. That's why it ended there. I understand you're crazy for going to the audition without knowing your place, but now you're acting up again, without any decency. What crazy director in the world would audition an actor who doesn't know how to stand in front of a camera? It's your fault for misunderstanding and going to the audition yourself. Do you understand? I don't know what evidence you have..."

 

"That...you really did it, didn't you?"

 

I heard Han-Soo's harsh voice.

 

"I just staged a casting that didn't even exist in the first place."

 

A moment of silence passed before Myungshin cursed loudly, "Damn it." 

 

He's really cursing a lot more people lately. While thinking this, Myungshin continued his threats towards the other party.

 

"What did you just say? You're asking if I really did it? If so, where's the evidence? And that long list you wrote on the card, was it a lie? Or do you want a disaster..."

 

I walked away, wondering to myself why I was only amused by his harsh words.

 

My footsteps echoed on the tiled bathroom floor. After a few steps, I saw Myungshin standing with his back to me. I walked past him to the sink. Then he stopped in front of the mirror as if about to go to the bathroom, and turned on the faucet as if intending to wash his hands.

 

Sizzle

As the water flowed, Myungshin’s threatening words faded into a whisper as someone else appeared.

 

"If you don't want to die a horrible death, then don't show your face here again..."

 

Just as I thought the voice was fading, it disappeared completely. I felt eyes watching me as I lathered soap on my hands and rinsed them, so I deliberately looked up slowly, only to meet the gaze of the person in the mirror. It was a very brief moment, less than a second, but we could clearly see each other's faces.

 

No, because I already knew the other person would confirm my face. Even though it was only for a brief moment, a look of shock and disbelief spread across his face. Myungshin's eyes were shrouded in darkness, like ink spreading in a wide circle. His face, pale as if he'd seen a ghost, gasped for breath the moment he saw my face.

 

Amazingly, you recognised me instantly! Have I really not changed that much? Part of me wanted to admire the picture more, but unfortunately, he turned away quickly. I turned my face away instantly, staring at him in the mirror as I turned off the noisy faucet. Then, silence enveloped the bathroom, as if time had stopped. As I slowly straightened up, staring intently at the mirror until I almost couldn't see through it, Myungshin quickly turned around and rushed out of the bathroom. Myungshin's stunned expression that had enveloped him vanished, and his hurried footsteps faded.

 

"It seems he really does have a skeleton in his closet."

 

I wiped my hands with a tissue before turning around when I heard Han-Soo's voice. He pointed in the direction Myungshin had disappeared.

 

"As soon as he saw you, he ran off like that."

 

I shifted my gaze towards the entrance. That's right. Maybe it wasn't just that. The money he stole from me would have been a large sum for Myungshin at that time. Or maybe not, but for me, it wasn't a big deal. If he thought he was only guilty of something related to money, there was no need to run away. So the reason is simple: he probably still has lingering memories of the past. The moment he saw me, those old feelings of fear that made him turn away must have surged back uncontrollably.

 

What we call memories, even if they're forgotten, can still resurface someday. If we meet again, the situation might have changed. We've had time to work through past feelings, and we know we're not the ones to be afraid of, because the present has changed. I don't care. This is how it should be; it's even more fun this way.

 

"You called me here because of this? Are you intending to say that it was really Youngshin's doing?" His tone wasn't angry, but so calm that I thought my words might not work. Invoking the manager to gain sympathy is probably futile. I guess there's nothing I can do but speak my mind. So, I opened my mouth with a bitter feeling.

 

"That's just the tip of the iceberg."

 

Han-Soo frowned.

 

"Just a light touch, huh?"

 

"You yourself said that even if you were lucky enough to find someone who wanted an idiot like you, you wouldn't want them now. And you asked if I expected you to get revenge as I did?" Looking at him as if to examine him, I saw him nod slightly with a confused expression. I tilted my head to the side, paused, and then asked...

 

"Say that again. Are you really not going to take the good luck anymore?"

 

"Why are you asking about that...?"

 

"Because there's a director who wants an idiot like you."

 

Han-Soo's eyes widened in an instant, and soon they were filled with disbelief.

 

"I didn't come here to listen to that kind of joke."

 

"I didn't come here to joke with you either."

 

"...."

 

"I asked what you were going to do."

 

"You're kidding, aren't you? Damn it! But everything Myungshin hyung said is true. I was too reckless and went to the audition without knowing my place, and it all fell apart, didn't it? Which director in the world would want an actor with camera phobia?”

 

"That's why I'm lucky."

 

Han-Soo still had a frown on his face, as if he didn't believe what I said.

 

"What exactly are you trying to say...?"

 

"There's a scene where the character freezes in front of the camera, and you're probably the only one who can do it. Wouldn't the director want you?" Han-Soo stared at me. He didn't move, as if he'd stopped breathing, yet the trembling in his eyes revealed what he was thinking.

 

"There's...no way there could be a role like that..."

 

"Sure, there is—a role perfect for an idiot like you. The role you'll be playing involves showing fear and trembling on camera. Doesn't sound fun? Your flaws might even give you a chance to overcome them, who knows? But if you don't like it, 'lucky this time,' then call your manager and decline, because he's the one who's currently bringing the director."

 

Shin said that."

 

"!"

 

"Of course, you have the right to refuse, but if you do that, know that you won't just lose the opportunity to perform." After a moment, Han-Soo breathed heavily and spoke in a low voice.

 

"Besides acting, what else will I lose?"

 

I answered his question. "Revenge"

 

I turned to look in the direction Myungshin had run off to again and added curtly,

 

"Your chance to get revenge will slip away."

 

"Do you...Do you think I would want revenge?"

 

"No, I didn't think like that, and I didn't expect you to get revenge either. But wouldn't you be upset? Don't lie and say you weren't angry when you heard Myungshin just now."

 

I looked at him, a slight smile playing on my lips.

 

"You don't have to seek revenge. I'll do it for you."

 

"W-why? Or is it because you want to use me to get revenge on the other side?"

 

"Are you stupid? I don't need someone like you."

 

Han-Soo closed his mouth again before looking at me with a complicated expression. Ah, he probably doesn't understand. I don't understand why I'm doing this.

 

"I just wanted to do that."

 

Meanwhile, I wondered if what was called an "unpleasant coincidence" was actually "attachment" as most people called it. Whatever it was, it's equally irritating.

 

"You don't really like me, do you? When we first met, you kept your distance, even displeased that I called you 'brother'."

 

"Don't worry, you're still the same. I don't like it when you call me 'brother'."

 

A look of bewilderment and incomprehension flickered in his eyes. I looked at him and replied curtly.

 

"There's something about you that I don't like."

 

"What is that?"

 

"… name"

 

Coincidence or a cursed connection?

 

"Your name is the same as my younger brother's."

 

I was right in my prediction that the manager would resolve the problem within three days. As I was walking out of the dimly lit art gallery towards the subway station, he called.

 

"Tomorrow I'll be going up to Seoul early with Song Hyung."

 

There was a hint of excitement in his voice, as if he had finally succeeded in persuading him. Then he rambled on about rather unimportant things, such as "if..."

 

Leaving in the dark, it should take no more than an hour to reach Seoul. PD Song can only stay for one day before he has to go back down because he's overwhelmed with work, and so on. I kept replying with "Yes, yes," but I knew he wanted to hear something else. After finishing the trivial report, he finally asked hesitantly, as if it were difficult for him to say.

 

"By the way, have you met Han-Soo yet?"

 

I, who had been strolling and chatting with him, stopped abruptly and turned halfway around. Han-Soo, who had been walking silently behind me since the art gallery, stared at the ground as if drowning. Lost in thought, he looked up and met my gaze, as if sensing something.

 

"yes"

 

This time, when I went to talk to the manager, I heard curious voices that couldn't hide their urgency.

 

"What did he say? Did you try to persuade him, and did he listen? He said, 'Why don't you give it a try?'"

 

I pulled the phone away from my ear and held it to the person next to me, silently giving them the answer they wanted. When I suddenly extended my hand, Han-Soo blinked in surprise. He looked startled, glancing at me and then at his phone.

 

"Did he ask me to talk to him?"

 

I nodded.

 

"Who is it?"

 

"manager"

 

Han-Soo froze for a moment, but reached out to take the phone. After a while, he heard someone say, "Yes, this is Han-Soo speaking," as they began walking back towards the train station. Once, I had to wait at the station entrance for a while before I saw him following me. It seemed like they were going to talk for quite a while, as it was rush hour and the station entrance was crowded with people walking in and out. I stood at the corner of the dirty sidewalk so as not to block his way, but he still noticed me and walked over to me.

 

"tomorrow..."

 

Han-Soo stopped walking and hesitated for a moment, avoiding eye contact.

 

"I'm going to the audition tomorrow."

 

After he finished speaking, he looked up and spoke calmly.

 

"Even though I don't believe in luck yet, I won't run away from it."

 

"It's just you," I stared at him with a cold gaze as I reached out to take my phone back. I didn't want his feelings towards me to change because of this. And I felt awkward because I had to tell my own story for this. Han-Soo looked at me silently before handing me the phone as if he understood what I meant.

 

"Thank you, Taemin Hyung."

 

I gasped, glancing at him with my phone still in mid-air, but he just smiled shyly instead.

 

"Okay, right? Because I'm calling you by a name different from your real one. I hope you won't get confused with your younger brother."

 

"I still don't like it."

 

I spoke in a low voice, grabbing the phone, but even as I did so, the smile on his lips remained.

 

"Okay, then I'll call you 'hyung' (older brother) when we're closer. For now, thank you, and... I apologize. Regarding what I said when you came to see me at the university."

 

He spoke cheerfully and clearly as usual, yet his voice still trembled slightly. I knew it was difficult to turn away from something you liked so casually, as if to forget about it instantly. He even tried to speak in his usual bright tone, as if instinctively knowing that if he wanted to thank me for keeping his distance, he should say it softly, as if it weren't important. But no matter what words he used, the thank you still made me uncomfortable.

 

"Don't misunderstand. I did this because I intended to get back at Myungshin later. I didn't help you because I like you."

 

"That's why I'm thanking you."

 

"..."

 

"If you intend to help me out of pity for me falling, then I'd only feel more pathetic and wouldn't want to do anything at all," a bitter smile flickered across his lips before he spoke in a calm voice.

 

"Therefore, from now on, I will help you in return. You can avenge me, and I will help you with everything."

 

"Mind your own business."

 

I refused heartlessly. Surprisingly, instead of getting upset, he smiled and replied, "Yes." 

 

Because of that, I just made my face even more serious. He was even more cruel than before, but Han-Soo didn't care and pointed to my phone.

 

"Oh, a message came in. It popped up while I was talking to my manager, so I accidentally read it," I heard Han-Soo's confession, tinged with guilt, before checking the phone he had just received.

 

"I was just asking, I mean... did your lover send it?"

 

What are you talking about? There's no way I'd ever do something like that.

 

(So ​​you've been thinking about me, huh? Me too. I'll be waiting, you two-hundred-won guy. Hurry up!) 

 

If the sender weren't that idiot, I would have just deleted it. But it's definitely a message from that idiot. Is he messing with me? While I was wondering about something, another message followed.

 

[Oh, and stop that pathetic part-time job that's taking up so much of our time right now!]

 

...Alice's boss, I don't know how he managed to send a message through that crazy guy's phone number, but I can't help but frown when I think about his demeanour.

 

"Your plan is perfect," Han-Soo asked me, as I stood with my head down for a long time.

 

"By the way, you mentioned waiting for 200 won. Did you borrow 200 won from that person?"

 

The moment he caught a glimpse of those sharp eyes, Han-Soo flinched, but unable to suppress his curiosity, he opened his mouth again.

 

"And what about the part-time job? And a part-time job at that? What is that? Or is it being a host...?"

 

"Go back."

 

I deflected his stunned expression and turned around before his hesitant voice stopped me.

 

"Wow, are you really that close to him?"

 

I turned to face him again. For a brief moment, the people passing through my field of vision froze in place, as if the scene had stopped in time.

 

"nothing"

 

The moment I left, suspicion arose in his mind.

 

"Really? But you said you didn't like that my name is the same as your younger sibling's... Isn't it because you're very close to them?"

 

"nothing"

 

I repeated my answer before Han Soo tilted his head.

 

"I thought there was some more serious problem, but it seems that's not. How old is your younger brother?"

 

"Grade 9"

 

I turned around just like that and heard Han-Soo exclaim, "Wow, he's so young!" After taking a few steps, I hid and disappeared into thin air with the crowd, before any other thoughts could take over my brain. That lunatic hadn't been to Alice's maze for days. It wasn't surprising, really, since he didn't go there often. But seeing the boss send a message impersonating him made it seem like he was going today.

 

I wasn't happy to see him. I just had something specific to discuss with him and felt the need to explain that I would have the manager review the script and contact PD Song without telling him anything. Suddenly, the phone vibrated.

 

[Don't go into Alice's maze]

 

The real lunatic is the one who sent it. The building was dark and deserted, like a pile of corpses. The eerie silence in the high-ceilinged lobby and the unusually chilling atmosphere were like that of the dead. Why was that lunatic still at the company after everyone had gone? I was so relieved by the message saying I didn't have to meet the boss in Alice's labyrinth, but now that I'm here, questions are popping up.

 

Although it wasn't surprising since we first met at the company, I was still uneasy about his position as a shareholder, not to mention his close relationship with Director Yoon. It's special, and I'm also intrigued by his deep involvement in this company's work. Although I can't delve into it, I have a feeling it could be a big problem. Moreover, unexpected things kept happening to him. So I was tense, like I was preparing for battle, as I went up to the rooftop as instructed.

 

He said, "I wonder if he's going to say something crazy again today. This time, I've prepared myself not to be easily startled, but preparing myself is probably useless anyway, because when he met him, he was already frozen in place by the unexpected situation."

 

I saw a man sleeping on a bench. Although the light wasn't very bright, as I got closer, I was sure the man there was that lunatic. What's going on? Why is he sleeping here? I feel completely exhausted, as if the surging fighting spirit I just felt has vanished. When I bent down to look at his face, apart from his breathing, he didn't move at all, as if he were in a deep sleep. I glanced around...Unbeknownst to me, they probably weren't hiding a camera there to test anything else. On the dark rooftop, only the eerie cold wind lingered. It was an empty place, just like the lobby.

 

Surprisingly, I didn't feel empty, and it was as if the space was filled with something. I lowered my gaze to the person who made me feel that way. One leg was folded on the bench, while the other dangled. He had still managed to lie down in such an uncomfortable position. Once the shock wore off, my eyes surveyed his face, and that was the first thought that came to mind. It was the only chance to look at him, defenceless, but the face that had once been so awkward and unsettlingly smiling now seemed like a completely different person.

 

He's quite handsome. So much so that I mistook him for Daradon when I first met him. I bent down to examine his face closely. A thought crept into my mind, "Hmm?" Something seemed to linger, as if I were intrigued by something. It was strange; why did it feel like I'd gazed at his face from this angle before? I tilted my head back, examining him more closely, and that feeling gradually became clearer, as if I had indeed looked at him this way once before...

 

*Grab*

!

Suddenly, my wrist was grabbed tightly like a noose. I quickly tried to lift my leaning body, but I couldn't overcome his pull and was dragged in. Luckily, my other arm managed to grab the backrest just in time before I fell on top of him in a rather embarrassing way. 

 

This guy wasn't really asleep after all. The humiliation of being caught and the anger of being deceived were overwhelming. It was all mixed up, making my face flush.

 

"Let go of my hand…"

 

I tried to say the words while shaking my wrist free, but I couldn't when I saw that lunatic still lying motionless and asleep. I pulled his wrist again, and his eyelids slowly opened. He blinked a few times, as if waking up, and then focused on me.

 

"Is that you?"

 

I was startled by the question, spoken in a dry, groggy voice, my arm weak and powerless. So, did that mean he heard my voice and, while asleep, instinctively reached out? While I wondered if he was some demon, he slowly stood up, still holding my wrist. I took a step back and tried to shake off his grip, but that listless voice stopped me again.

 

"My face is all tingly because of your eyes," he muttered, glancing at me with wide, alert eyes.

 

"It's so great that you're the boss."

 

I automatically looked up when I heard a sound so faint, like a whisper.

 

"Then go back to sleep. I'll keep an eye on you."

 

"Ah, that's a good idea. Did you really text me to say you missed me?"

 

A message? Ah, damn, the boss, huh? How did he manage to send that message?

 

"I didn't send it to you, and you didn't send me any weird, nonsensical things like 'I miss you,' did you?"

 

"Did you get a message like that? Show me. I might have sent one."

 

I didn't have the energy to argue with him, who seemed to be enjoying himself, so I turned around. But just as I was about to walk forward, he grabbed me and pulled me back. I was in a rather awkward situation...Amused, I gripped his foot harder and blurted it out.

 

"Let go."

 

He grinned and grabbed my arm so hard my hand went numb. Ugh! I turned my face away to prevent the groaning inside me from escaping. A gentle voice will sound in your ear.

 

"I just want us to sleep together, that's all. Don't object."

 

He spoke in a tone that was so soothing, so unlike him, that I wondered if I was hearing things. Unconsciously, I forgot my anger and asked him back...

 

"Where are we going?"

 

He pulled me aside before replying. "Go to sleep."

 

"Ding!" After the door closed with the sound of the automatic locking system, I finally realised where I was. Perhaps it was because it took a while to drive here.

 

The drive was less than ten minutes from the company, so there wasn't enough time to compose myself. Even I, who used to brag about being a rough-and-tumble delivery driver, couldn't help but worry when I saw him hastily change lanes and floor the accelerator. Although I told him to drive carefully, he just glanced at me and asked a short question.

 

"Are you scared?"

 

"Yes, I was terrified."

 

Of course, I retorted sarcastically, and he actually slowed down and became more cautious. Why did he heed my advice? Was it that simple? I was speechless, bewildered, glancing at him suspiciously. And he just brought me here without saying a word. I mean, here... at his house. I stood by the automatically lit entrance lamp, looking out the window, and just stood there. At first, I was puzzled, but then I realised they'd actually brought me home.

 

"Really?" When I didn't move, puzzled, he, who had been walking ahead down the small hallway, turned back to look at me.

 

"Don't be afraid, I won't attack you."

 

This time, his tone of voice was different. It wasn't his usual cold, chuckled tone, but a gentle one that comforted me. I didn't understand. I was so engrossed in my own thoughts that I completely forgot to respond to his rude remarks. Just then, he tilted his head and looked at me.

 

"You had something you wanted to talk to me about, didn't you?"

 

What was there to talk about? Then I suddenly remembered I needed to tell him about the script.

 

"How did you know I had something to tell you?"

 

A weary expression flickered across his face for a moment before a kind voice followed.

 

"You went all the way to the company, and then followed me here so quietly—that's not like you at all."

 

He spoke unusually rapidly before adding something slow, and the reason why his speech sounded strange came straight from his mouth.

 

"Hurry up and follow me, I'm sleepy."

 

Despite saying he was sleepy, the crazy guy remained completely normal. He took a small bottle of water from the refrigerator and plopped down on the sofa where I was sitting. The spacious and beautiful house was decorated with expensive materials. Yet, the atmosphere, which should have made me feel uncomfortably nervous, felt relaxing thanks to the books and scripts haphazardly piled on the desk. Judging by his personality, he seemed meticulous, but seeing the equally cluttered study and the entire house, I felt relieved. The crazy guy noticed my gaze scrutinising the mess around him and explained further.

 

"There's nothing to be as proud of as a meerkat."

 

"A meerkat, huh?"

 

He stared intently at me before replying.

 

"Yes, there really are animals that are as big and ferocious as you."

 

"A ferocious animal," I nodded dismissively, trying to hide my slightly improved mood.

 

"I don't know if I'm a meerkat, but I don't look surprised at all."

 

When I didn't hear a response, I turned around and saw him looking at me with a smile that revealed his dimples. That smile was slightly different from usual. Even with that smile before, his eyes would always make me uneasy. But now, those eyes look so listless, like someone truly defenceless.

 

"You're really sleepy, aren't you?"

 

Once I finally believed what he said, he mumbled something while raising the water bottle to his lips.

 

"Even I, after three days of sleepless nights, would be exhausted. Anyway, what were you going to say?" After downing half a bottle of water in one gulp, he asked me without wasting any more time. Is he really that sleepy? I looked at him; he seemed perfectly alert. I paused for a moment before mentioning a screenplay I had read.

 

"I showed that script to my manager, and then something came up, so I contacted the director...but I thought I should tell you too." I felt too embarrassed to use the word 'asking for permission,' yet I was still a little worried, because no matter what, I had been using his script as I pleased.

 

Okay, this guy has a history of demanding 200 won for just half a cigarette. So I was prepared for it. From what I've seen so far, he wouldn't let this slide. But instead, he said just one sentence nonchalantly into my slightly nervous ear.

 

"Is that all?"

 

I wondered if this was a result of drowsiness, but I nodded in relief, thinking it wasn't a big deal.

 

"That's all."

 

I wanted to stop talking and leave, but then I ended up asking something so unlike myself.

 

"Why aren't you angry? I secretly showed the script you gave me to read in your office to the manager," he closed the water bottle and looked at me with an emotionless expression, a silent reply. I felt uncomfortable, so he finally spoke.

 

"Are you mistaken about something? Don't you think what you did deserves praise?"

 

"Look for?"

 

I asked again, startled. He twisted his legs and mumbled something I didn't understand.

 

"Let's just say you'll find out later how amazing something you've done was."

 

Knowing that he wasn't the type to talk nonsense, I tried to guess what was so great about it. But nothing became clear. He thought the movie would be Successful? No matter how fun it is, I don't think it will be very popular because it lacks elements that audiences will like. The film's mood is rather boring, like a short film the director made as a first attempt. But I'm not an expert, so I might be wrong. I don't know. I tilted my head before hearing the question.

 

"But do you think I'd get angry over something like that?"

 

"Hmm."

 

When I replied without hesitation, a sly smile appeared at the corner of his mouth.

 

"Why would you think that? I cherish you so much."

 

You're saying something so inappropriate again. You say you're sleepy, but you're still teasing me? While I was stammering about how to reply, I remembered a phrase...Words that have been said before.

 

"Because you're a psychopath."

 

I felt the smile fade from his face in an instant. Soon, he nodded seriously.

 

"That's right."

 

This happened once before. It's truly amazing how calmly he accepts being insulted. How many insults has he heard before?

 

"But I've been pretty good to you, haven't I?"

 

The guy, who had been speaking so shamelessly, turned towards me and rested one arm on the back of the sofa.

 

"Come to think of it, you always do things that surprise me. I never thought you'd have such a straightforward side."

 

"I just don't like the feeling of being indebted to someone, that's all."

 

"And you are also very determined and focused."

 

I glared at him, my gaze fixed on the corner of his mouth as a smile curved upwards. But that feeling of displeasure turned into surprise when I heard his next question.

 

"Have you ever actually cried?"

 

The moment I looked back with a questioning gaze, as if to ask, "What are you talking about?" he spoke softly. "When other people cry, I never really feel sad along with them. But there was one time I saw someone cry and truly felt their sadness. It's blurry, but it really hurts here."

 

He placed his hand on his heart. I followed the movement of his hand but couldn't quite understand the words I heard. The sadness was so profound it broke the heart of anyone watching. What does sharp pain feel like? When I looked up, I met a pair of vacant eyes that seemed devoid of any emotion.

 

"Unfortunately, I let that person slip through my fingers. When I first met you and heard you speak the word 'revenge' without any hesitation, I felt a surge of anger. It's like, if you express your emotions honestly, this part of me will react again."

 

There's no way that's the case. Even when my younger brother was stabbed right in front of my eyes, I was such a jerk that I didn't feel any remorse. I couldn't control my feelings. He kept it to himself for a moment before shaking his head.

 

"You've misunderstood."

 

"Even if you think that, I'm becoming more and more certain."

 

I frowned at those words before recalling something he had said before.

 

"That person...is the one who once made you angry, right?"

 

Moreover, he was the first man to do so. When I heard that, I felt disheartened, thinking that if he were caught by that lunatic, he would surely die. But it seems that wasn't the case. That's the only thing.

 

"Yes, that's him. He's the one who planted the bomb for me."

 

Seeing the other person genuinely smiling, I felt that someone I'd never even seen the face of was truly amazing. He slept with that lunatic, cried and wailed sorrowfully, and then dropped a bombshell on him before running away. Ordering him to do just one thing would be impossible, but he did three! Even after five years, the person in front of me is still searching for him. I wonder if, after all this time, that lunatic never found him again.

 

"You probably won't find it," I spoke with a feeling of satisfaction before his eyes narrowed.

 

"Of course, I found it, because I checked thoroughly to be sure."

 

"What are you looking at?" Suddenly, he spoke through clenched teeth, as if muttering to himself.

 

"Look, that guy's got his back turned while he's putting on his pants."

 

What is he talking about? I was worried he was going crazy from lack of sleep, before he got up and beckoned me to follow him. Then I sat there for a while. He stood still, stubbornly wondering why he had to get up, and spoke rapidly, as if irritated.

 

"If you have nothing more to say, then hurry up and keep your promise."

 

"What promise?"

 

"Didn't you say you'd watch over me while I slept?"

 

"..."

 

"What are you doing? I told you I'm sleepy."

 

Damn it. If he finds the person who shook his heart five years ago, will he let me go? Or should I be the one searching for that person, too? I groaned deep down. In my mind, I sat there reluctantly, not wanting to do it, when he urged me again.

 

"I said I was sleepy, that's true, but I didn't say I was in a state where I couldn't drag you along. And you're the one who said it yourself, aren't you?" 

 

Yes, I said it myself. That's why I was even more annoyed, so I gritted my teeth, got up, and followed him. But when the door opened, and I saw a bed, I stopped dead in my tracks.

 

"Are you going to sleep here?"

 

He turned to look at me as if he couldn't believe it.

 

"Well, this is the bedroom."

 

"You sleep soundly everywhere, don't you?"

 

I never imagined he'd be sleeping on a bench on the company's rooftop. By the way, why does he go to the company so often?

 

"So just look how comfortably I sleep when I'm lying on my bed."

 

An unfamiliar, kind voice spoke again. I glared at him like I was looking at a demon, then, caught off guard, I was grabbed by the hand and dragged into a room. I thought, "Well, since it's already here..." It would have been better to just watch him sleep and hurry up, but instead, he lay down on the bed and pulled my hand with him.

 

"What? What is this? Why am I...?"

 

I was pulled down onto the bed amidst the panic. He said he was just sleepy and incredibly strong. I tried to roll over a bit to get up. Automatically, his arms wrapped tightly around my waist.

 

"release!"

 

I pushed his arm away forcefully, but it had no effect whatsoever. Instead, he put his leg over mine from behind, preventing me from moving, and then sighed. He took another deep breath. I could feel the clear pounding of his heart against my back, making me startled and about to say something, but his breath brushed against the back of my neck first.

 

"Ah, you're quite the wriggler."

 

I was speechless, so I just chuckled, stunned by his frustration. I don't think I'm easily flustered, but why did he say that? I'm always speechless when I'm in front of this guy.

 

"If you don't like it when I squirm, then let go. I said I'd watch you sleep, but I didn't say I'd be your pillow."

 

"I'm not asleep yet."

 

It's like parents who leave the TV on and say they're not asleep yet, even though their voice is hoarse.

 

"If you want to watch me sleep that much, then turn and look at me. I like that better." 

 

Even though he said that, his arms and legs wrapped around me even tighter, making it hard for me to breathe. I cursed inwardly while trying to ignore it. His body, pressed against my back, hips, and legs, was as hard as a rock. Ugh, damn it.

 

"I don't like any of them."

 

"You don't have to like me, it's just that you were the one who said first that you wanted to watch me sleep."

 

He spoke with a brazen air, as if to say, "Since you said it yourself, I can do whatever I want." Yet, this brazenness was as faint as a whisper. His breathing was almost inaudible, and soon I could only hear his breathing. The grip around me loosened slightly. Although he was holding me as tightly as an iron rod, it seemed as if I could somehow push him, even in his sleep, away. Even so, I didn't get up and decided to stay a little longer.

 

It was because of that crazy script that Han-Soo decided to return to acting. Consider this his way of paying off a debt. I stared at the air for only five minutes before counting to five. During that time, I heard steady breathing. I could feel the body breathing against my back, and a heart still beating silently, without knowing how much time had passed.

 

The next day, after being contacted by the manager, I went to one of the film companies that Han-soo had decided to audition for. The film company looked like a warehouse. Located on the top floor of a dilapidated building, upon opening the door, you see a cramped office with desks crammed together. This must be the company planning to make this film. As I walked past the open door, I saw a middle-aged man, around forty, who seemed to be PD Song, talking to a woman. They were discussing location coordination with serious expressions and tones. They didn't even notice I'd entered. Again, even the manager and Han-Soo, who arrived earlier, greeted me.

 

"Did you come after you finished your class?"

 

The manager asked questions like a parent sending their first child to elementary school. When I nodded in response, Han-Soo walked over and asked in a softer voice..."By the way, don't you need any anxiety medication?"

 

I asked back why they needed that, and the manager, who had just returned from who knows where, exchanged nervous glances with Han-Soo.

 

"He has a truly strong will."

 

"Right? When he had his first interview at the company and saw him not blinking once, you knew he was a strong-willed person."

 

"That's right. A strong-willed person like you is probably more worried about what to eat for lunch than about the audition."

 

"Hey, you spoke well. So, are you worried about what you're going to have for lunch? You're quite the strong-willed one, Taemin. What do you say? Are you worried...?"

 

"..."

 

"...Are you angry?"

 

"yes"

 

Both of them turned sharply and cleared their throats simultaneously, though they were somewhat surprised at how quickly they had returned to their normal selves. But I didn't feel annoyed at all. Han-Soo’s eyes were slightly red, as if he had been crying heavily, and they were swollen. After I looked at Han-Soo, he turned to face the manager.

 

"But why are you giving me anxiety medication?"

 

"Hmm, that's because I think I'll try auditioning today."

 

"Who is it?"

 

"Mr"

 

"."

 

"Oh, didn't I tell you you have to audition too? I bragged about you to the PD!" My stern expression was masked by the manager's cheerful tone, before I heard confirmation of the situation from nearby.

 

"Oh, so this is the 'god-like' actor who they say is just so-so in real life but photographs beautifully, right?" I looked at PD Song as he walked in and almost blurted out, "Who are you talking about?"

 

The desks and chairs used at the university were located at the front of a place piled high with belongings. The PD (Program Director) and the manager were sitting there in a row, Han Soo was standing in front of us, and we both held a short film script in our hands. Even though they gave me twenty minutes to memorise the script, I honestly felt a little confused because when I read it in class, the instructor would explain it to me.

 

Previously, most instructions were simple, telling me to read about the situation and the mood. So, a piece of paper with nothing but a blurb seemed like a blank sheet of paper to me. Even though jumping out there without knowing anything shouldn't have been scary at all, how was I supposed to portray it? There were only a few lines of character information, and the script was just someone describing their daily routine. I tried to imagine what kind of situation I was in, and then PD Song told me to start. 

 

"Who will go first? You're the one with camera phobia, right, Han-Soo?"

 

When Han Soo nodded nervously, PD Song signalled for the scene to begin. Han-Soo reviewed the script, took a deep breath, looked up, and began.

 

He revealed his true self in a place where no cameras were positioned. All the memorable lines flowed from his lips in that brief moment. Still not understanding what kind of emotion I was supposed to feel while reading this chapter, I heard Han-Soo's low, almost controlled voice in my ear. In the chapter, simply describing daily routines can suppress the pain, transforming it into the sorrow of someone calmly reassuring the other that they are living a comfortable life. The seemingly ordinary content, which made the listener feel uncomfortable, the final description of what he ate for lunch, what he does at the company, and the fact that his usual bus was late today, almost turned into a moment of sobbing. But in the end, the story concluded with his relaxed smile. 

 

Excellent. I was impressed by Han-Soo's abilities, seeing him up close like this, before hearing PD Sung's feelings.

 

"I don't see anything wrong with playing it."

 

I was taken aback by the unremarkable tone of voice and turned around to see Han-Soo bowing and thanking him. A performance of this calibre was clearly flawed; the background music was impossible to miss.

 

"Where exactly can't I play?" I was stunned before PD Song pointed at me.

 

"Mr Lee Taemin, why don't you try playing it too?"

 

Perhaps because I had just watched Han-Soo’s amazing performance, my mouth felt unusually dry. I glanced down at the script in my hand and closed my eyes for a moment.

First, I completely erased the image of Han-Soo from my mind and went back to before, back to the inexperienced me who didn't know how to read a script. If you don't know, just play along. What's the point of describing daily routines anyway? I forgot about it, glanced down at the script, and shamelessly recited it aloud.

 

Because he couldn't remember it, he recited it with an utterly bored tone, as if explaining his own work to someone. After the performance, PD Song expressed his feelings.

 

"I can't take it anymore."

 

Of course, upon hearing that, I didn't think of bowing like Han-Soo’s. I stared at him with a look that said, "Oh, is that so?" Surprisingly, the manager and the person next to me smiled, pleased with PD Song's feedback. The moment I shifted my focus to him, the manager, whose eyes met mine, cleared his throat and continued to praise me in front of PD Song nonstop.

 

"But when it comes to being photogenic, he's definitely the best."

PD Song ignored the thumbs-up gesture and then gave Han-Soo another order.

 

"Try saying that line again."

 

"Should I display it the same way?"

 

When Han-Soo asked, PD Song shrugged and mumbled, "Do as you please," then added casually, "But this time, I'll be performing in front of the camera."

 

Han-Soo’s face turned pale in an instant. Even though he had prepared himself for performing in front of the camera, he still felt terrified as usual. However, PD Song’s words, saying that afterwards, sounded strange.

 

"If you perform the same way as before, it'll be easier to compare it to when you're in front of the camera," he said, then turned to pick up a small camera from the pile of clutter behind him and placed the device, with its red recording light turned on, on top of it.

 

"You can start now."