メロウレイン / Futtara Doshaburi Mellow Rain
Yummy, Gummi
On Friday night, by the time Hagiwara finished working overtime and headed straight to Sei’s flat, it was already so late that he’d barely managed to catch the last train.
Before leaving the office, he’d sent Sei a LINE message telling him to go to bed first. But when he let himself in with his spare key, the lights were still on, and he could hear the television playing.
“Welcome back. I’ve run you a bath.”
“Seriously? That’s brilliant. Thank you.”
“Is it still raining?”
“Just a bit of drizzle. The annoying sort.”
“Still, once the rainy season ends, it’ll get hot all at once.”
“Ugh, don’t remind me.”
At the time they were having that conversation, Sei had still been behaving perfectly normally.
Hagiwara took his time soaking in the bath, then changed into some comfortable clothes. Feeling thoroughly refreshed, he emerged from the bathroom and spotted Sei through the open sliding partition.
He was sitting on the floor, leaning against the bed and watching television.
“Sorry. Were you staying up waiting for me?”
Hagiwara called out, but there was no clear answer.
He thought he heard something resembling “Mm”, although it was difficult to tell whether it was a voice or merely a sigh.
Did he fall asleep while waiting?
Hagiwara approached, crouched beside him and placed a hand on his shoulder.
“Nakarai? Why don’t you get into bed?”
Sei suddenly whipped his head around, startling Hagiwara so badly that he snatched his hand away.
“Bloody hell, you scared me… What’s wrong?”
Rather than answering, Sei patted the floor beside him, apparently telling Hagiwara to sit down. Hagiwara obliged and only then noticed that Sei was holding something.
“What’s that?”
“Gummies.”
At the bottom of a transparent glass was a collection of jelly-like lumps.
Looking more closely, Hagiwara realised they were tiny jelly sweets, each roughly the size of a fingernail.
Haribo gummy bears.
Sei mercilessly impaled one of the little bears with a cocktail pick and carried it to his mouth.
The amber-coloured bear disappeared between his lips, and Hagiwara could tell from the movement of his cheeks that he was chewing it.
“Give me one.”
“More importantly…”
When Hagiwara reached towards the glass, Sei swiftly moved it out of reach and brought his face closer instead.
It was only then that Hagiwara noticed his eyes.
Both were glossy and moist, almost like the gummy bears themselves.
“Hang on. Are you drunk?”
Come to think of it, there was a faint smell of alcohol. Sei hadn’t seemed remotely drunk before Hagiwara went into the bathroom.
“Hagiwara, don’t you have something to tell me?”
The unexpected question interrupted his thoughts.
“Huh?”
“There’s something you ought to tell me, isn’t there?”
“Er… No, not really.”
“Liar.”
“Eh?”
This time, three gummy bears fell victim to the mercilessly sharp cocktail pick.
Sei tilted his head back, stretched his throat and opened his mouth wide, slowly lowering the skewered bears inside.
It looked like one of those magic tricks where someone swallowed a sword. Or was that something Indian yogis did? Maybe it was a circus trick?
Hagiwara found himself distracted by this entirely pointless question. Then he noticed liquid dripping from the tip of the pick.
Finally, he understood.
“Nakarai, what the hell is that?”
“I told you. Gummies.”
“Those aren’t ordinary gummies.”
He more or less forcibly took the glass from Sei and sniffed its contents.
The unmistakable smell of alcohol drifted straight into his nose.
“Whoa. That’s a lot of booze.”
“I heard they’re good if you soak them in whisky.”
Hagiwara tried one for himself. Whisky burst from the cola-flavoured gummy as he bit into it, creating something rather like a sweet whisky and cola.
It was actually quite good. But it was far too strong.
Each gummy was so small that it would be easy to keep picking at them without thinking, especially with a glassful sitting beside you.
Yet judging by the flavour, the alcohol content was considerable.
The very fact that they were so easy to eat made them dangerous.
“I was waiting for you to finish your bath, and I just wanted something to put in my mouth. Once I started, I couldn’t stop.”
So Sei had carried on eating them until he’d become thoroughly tipsy.
Hagiwara couldn’t tell whether the remark about wanting something in his mouth was supposed to mean anything. Sei’s expression was both guilelessly innocent and strangely calculating.
Between that gaze and his lips, which looked far more delicious than the gummies, Hagiwara found himself irresistibly drawn towards him.
But just as he was about to get close enough, Sei pushed him away.
“You still haven’t answered my question.”
“…What?”
“What do you have to tell me?”
“Eh? Something I need to tell you? No, nothing.”
Even if Sei insisted otherwise, there was simply nothing to tell.
Hagiwara wasn’t hiding any guilty secrets, nor was he secretly arranging some elaborate surprise.
Cheating was out of the question. He hadn’t even been to a singles’ party. He hadn’t hidden a failed test or secretly eaten something from Sei’s fridge, either.
“Look, if there’s something bothering you, why don’t you just tell me what it is?”
“Oh, so that’s how you’re going to get out of it.”
“I’m not trying to get out of anything.”
Besides, Sei’s eyes were becoming distinctly unfocused.
“…Wait. I know what you’re doing. You’re trying to trick me into confessing something, aren’t you? Like those stupid things they do on television, hoping I’ll incriminate myself. Don’t pull that sort of rubbish on me.”
“Eh? You really think I’d do something that underhanded?”
Sei glared up at him from beneath his brows, making Hagiwara instinctively recoil.
“No, but seriously, I haven’t got a clue what you’re talking about.”
“Think harder!”
Sei pressed the tip of his index finger against Hagiwara’s chest and began drawing circles. He pressed surprisingly hard. It actually hurt.
“I don’t know! If I’ve done something without realising it, I’ll apologise, but you’ve got to tell me what it is!”
“No.”
Sei abruptly turned his face away, climbed onto the bed and presented Hagiwara with his back.
“I’m going to sleep.”
“Eh? Wait a minute.”
“Goodnight.”
“You can’t just go to sleep without telling me! Now I’m going to be lying awake wondering what the hell I’ve done!”
“Shut up.”
Hagiwara tried gently shaking him, but Sei’s shoulders soon began rising and
falling in the slow, steady rhythm of sleep.
He was hardly sober enough to hold a sensible conversation anyway, so Hagiwara had little choice but to give up.
Seriously? Did I actually do something wrong?
He chewed one of the whisky-soaked gummies Sei had left behind. It had a dangerously soft, almost melting texture, and alcohol spread throughout his mouth.
These things could give you a nasty hangover.
When Sei woke up, his head was pounding.
Or, more accurately, the headache was what had woken him.
He slowly raised his upper body, careful not to make the throbbing any worse. Hagiwara was nowhere to be seen.
Huh? Didn’t he come over last night?
No, he did… Didn’t he?
Sei tried to rummage through the fragments of his hazy memory, but the effort sent a sharp pain through his brain, as though someone had plunged a knife into it.
“Oww…”
He sat there clutching his knees and groaning when he heard the front door open.
“I’m back. You’re awake?”
“Welcome home. Morning.”
“It’s a bit late to be saying good morning. It’s midday.”
“Seriously? You should’ve woken me.”
“Well, you were sleeping so soundly.”
There was something slightly awkward about Hagiwara’s reply, as though he were holding something back.
“Want something to eat? We were out of eggs, so I went and bought some.”
“Mmm… My head hurts too much.”
“All right. I’ll make you some coffee, then.”
“Thanks.”
When Sei sat down at the table, Hagiwara was already sitting in front of his own plate of ham and eggs. He looked slightly nervous as he spoke.
“Do you remember what happened last night?”
“Last night? Eh? What happened?”
Sei searched his memory.
“Well… You came over, had a bath, and I was waiting for you… Oh, sorry. Did I fall asleep halfway through something?”
When he’d woken, he was properly dressed, and apart from his head, nothing hurt. His body didn’t feel particularly exhausted, either.
Perhaps he’d fallen asleep at an especially unfortunate moment. Or, depending on how you looked at it, a particularly fortunate one.
“No, it’s not that… You were pretty drunk last night, weren’t you? On those whisky-soaked gummies.”
“Ahh… Maybe.”
He’d been perfectly fine while having a drink alone earlier in the evening. But while waiting for Hagiwara to finish his bath, he’d started picking at the gummies, one or two at a time.
Apparently, without realising it, he’d crossed the threshold from merely tipsy to thoroughly intoxicated.
“…Did I do something stupid while I was drunk?”
“Eh?”
“You kept asking me, ‘Don’t you have something to tell me?’ Over and over again.”
“Oh, really?”
“Don’t just say ‘Oh, really’! What the hell was that about? I thought and thought about it, but I couldn’t come up with a single thing! Then you went to sleep before me, and I ended up worrying about it so much that I couldn’t get to sleep!”
“Ah. Sorry.”
“So, what’s the answer?”
“…Who knows?”
Sei didn’t have the faintest idea himself. He tilted his head slightly and offered his most charming smile, but Hagiwara wasn’t impressed.
“What the hell’s that supposed to mean?”
“You’ve been messing me about all this time…”
“I said I’m sorry. But you shouldn’t take everything a drunk person says so seriously.”
“You’re the one who kept asking me about it!”
“Eh…”
Sei understood, intellectually, that he’d apparently done something wrong. But without any memory of the incident, it was difficult to feel particularly remorseful. His hangover wasn’t helping matters, either.
His ability to think clearly had yet to recover, and in an attempt to lighten the atmosphere, he made a remark that only made things worse.
“Well, if you’re getting that angry, maybe there really is something you’ve been feeling guilty about—”
Sei hadn’t even finished speaking when Hagiwara interrupted him sharply.
Then, with astonishing speed, Hagiwara finished his brunch, promptly washed his plate and announced, “I’m going home.”
“Eh? Wait, I’m sorry!”
“You’ve got a headache, haven’t you? Just take it easy.”
He had clearly managed to put Hagiwara in a thoroughly bad mood.
Still, it wasn’t the sort of argument that made Sei think their relationship might end if he didn’t stop him from leaving. So even after Hagiwara had gone, Sei continued leisurely drinking his coffee.
Hmm. I really don’t remember any of it. And yet something bothered him.
Even if he’d been drunk, would he really have demanded that Hagiwara confess something without having any reason to do so?
Perhaps there actually had been something he’d intended to say to Hagiwara, something he’d simply forgotten. No good. I haven’t got a clue.
He knew he ought to apologise properly. But when he glanced towards the draining rack, where the freshly washed dishes were gleaming, he suddenly felt laughter bubbling up inside him.
Even when he’s angry, he still eats properly.
It was another rainy day.
The sun had already set behind the clouds without showing its face even once when Sei’s phone call came through.
“Hello?”
“I’ve figured it out.”
Sei launched straight into the subject.
“Huh?”
“The mystery of ‘Haven’t you got something to tell me?’ There actually was something, after all. I’ve remembered.”
“What was it?”
“Do you want to hear it now, or would you rather hear it in person? I’m pretty close to your place already.”
“…Isn’t that obvious?”
“You’re not angry any more?”
Sei clearly hadn’t doubted which option Hagiwara would choose.
“I was angry, but you’ve come all the way over here, so we’re even.”
“You’re letting me off that easily?”
“Of course.”
“Thank you. That’s one of the things I love about you.”
After that unexpectedly sincere declaration, Sei told him he’d arrive in about five minutes and ended the call.
“Oi! You’re supposed to say things like that to my face!”
Hagiwara complained to his now-silent phone.
When Sei arrived, he brought the familiar jar of whisky-soaked gummies as a present. How much genuine remorse this represented was anyone’s guess.
“You shouldn’t make so many if you can’t finish them.”
“If I leave them at home, I’ll just eat too many.”
“Besides, both the gummies and the whisky were souvenirs from the section manager’s trip. I had more than I knew what to do with.”
“…So?”
What’s the answer to the question?
Hagiwara looked at him expectantly.
Sei gave him a sly grin and reached out, taking hold of his chin.
“What? Nervous?”
“Of course I am.”
After getting so angry, discovering that he’d actually done something wrong would be both embarrassing and rather unfair of him.
“It’s nothing that serious.”
“Then hurry up and tell me.”
“I’ll ask you just one more time. Are you absolutely sure you haven’t got any idea?”
“I told you I haven’t! Ahh, seriously, stop it. You’re going to give me a heart attack.”
“Honestly. You’re hopeless.”
Sei moved his hand from Hagiwara’s chin to his ear, gave it a gentle tug and whispered into it.
“…Password.”
“Eh?”
“Still don’t understand? Your company login password. You went and used my name without asking, didn’t you?”
To log into the company’s network, employees needed both an ID and a password. Their IDs were the employee numbers assigned to them when they joined the company, while passwords could be chosen individually.
Unfortunately, the password requirements were a nuisance. They had to contain both letters and numbers, be at least eight characters long, and be changed every six months. Reusing previous passwords wasn’t permitted, either.
Reminder emails began arriving every day two weeks before the deadline, warning employees that it was almost time to update them. But Hagiwara had been so busy that he’d repeatedly forgotten to deal with it.
By the time he remembered, he had only five minutes left. If he allowed the password to expire, he’d have to visit the IT department the following day and ask them to reset it.
He’d already exhausted every combination he could think of involving Hagiwara and numbers associated with himself.
Unable to come up with anything else, he’d tried using Sei’s surname and birthday instead. The system accepted it immediately.
“When I tried setting mine, it said, ‘This password has already been used.’ I was shocked.”
“That doesn’t necessarily mean it was me. Maybe someone secretly has a crush on you, Nakarai, and—”
“But it was you, wasn’t it?”
“Yeah.”
“Then why bother arguing?”
“Oh, so that’s all it was.”
Hagiwara let out a long sigh of relief and wrapped his arms around Sei.
“Bloody hell. That’s ridiculous…”
“Excuse me, password thief.”
“Thief? Come on… Actually, I’m surprised you’ve never used it yourself.”
“I’ve always used the passwords the system automatically recommends.”
“Isn’t that a pain?”
Naturally, the automatically generated passwords consisted of completely random combinations of letters and numbers, making them almost impossible to remember.
“Well, yes. So I used to write them on sticky notes and put them on my computer. But someone from IT came over the other day and told me off.”
“Well, obviously! That completely defeats the point of having a password!”
“But it’s only an internal company system, and there’s nothing particularly confidential in my messages… Anyway, I suppose I’ll have to choose something easier to remember.”
“…Or so I thought, but you’d already taken it.”
“Eh? Is that my fault? …Oh, whatever. At least that’s cleared things up.”
“Shall we have a toast?”
“To what?”
“The end of the rainy season, perhaps. It’s already stopped raining. Apparently, they’re going to officially announce the end of the rainy season tomorrow.”
“Summer’s here, then.”
“Yeah.”
They dropped several gummy bears into glasses of sparkling water filled with roughly chopped pieces of lemon.
The tiny bears became covered in bubbles, making a gentle fizzing sound as they floated about. They looked rather content.
Having established a mutual non-aggression pact regarding each other’s passwords, they clinked their glasses together in celebration of the approaching summer.