Love Upon A Time.

Special Chapter 1 - Dream At Night.

Since he could remember, Kaew had had this older boy he was very close to, almost like an older brother to him. Kaew was the youngest son of Ok-phra Sinthara-nurak of the City Guard Bureau and Khun Ying Chuen. It could be said that he was a late-born child because all his older brothers were more than ten years older than him. The brother closest in age to him was still nine years older. They'd all grown into young men at the age where they were courting women, so none of them was interested in playing with a little kid like Kaew. Thus, even though he wasn't an only child, Kaew had no playmates his age.

 

As he began to understand more, the little boy grew mischievous, as kids do. He wanted to run around playing hide-and-seek and tag with the servant children his age, but his parents often forbade him, saying he shouldn't lower himself by mingling with the servants in the house. No matter how much he wanted playmates, Kaew didn't want to be scolded or punished by being deprived of sweets, so he had to play alone, riding a banana b hobby horse, which wasn't fun at all. Until one day, Ok-phra Sinthara-nurak's house welcomed a visitor. That day, Kaew's colourless world was changed forever.

 

"Kaew, come and greet him, dear."

 

Khun Ying Chuen, his mother, held her four-year-old's hand, just awakened from a nap, and led him to greet the son of her close friend, who held the title of Phraya and had just returned to the capital. Kaew instantly shook off his drowsiness, his round eyes like a kitten's, curiously staring at the boy who seemed only a few years older than him.

 

"This is the son of Phraya Sukosol, named Jom. He's three years older than you, so you must call him P'Jom, dear."

 

"Greetings, P'Jom, "the little boy said, raising his hands in a respectful wai as he'd been well taught. The boy named Jom returned the gesture with a wide smile, revealing small canine teeth.

 

"What is your name?"

 

"My name is Kaew."

 

"Then, Kaew, come play tag with me downstairs."

 

P'Jom took his hand and led him down from the house to play tag while the adults chatted, with the servants following them in a group.

 

Being so young, Kaew couldn't remember much detail from that day. He only remembered that he was very happy and excited to finally have a playmate his age. When P'Jom was about to leave, Kaew cried loudly, tears and snot running down his face, not looking forward to losing his new friend. But one thing he remembered clearly was that before leaving, P'Jom came to him with a wide smile.

 

"Why are you crying? My house isn't far. I'll come to play with you again tomorrow. I'll come to play with you every day."

 

That promise made Kaew stop crying, and from then on, P'Jom kept his promise faithfully. The four-year-old and seven-year-old boys became close friends. P'Jom's house wasn't far from his, only about a ten-minute walk. They took turns playing at each other's houses every day. Kaew also got to know P'Phop and Klao, who were P'Jom's friends. P'Phop was very kind, while P'Klao was quiet and shy. The four of them played together from then on, with Kaew being the youngest in the group. Even though P'Phop and P'Klao were very kind to him, just like P'Jom, Kaew still felt closest to P'Jom.

 

"P'Jom, P'Jom, I want some sugar."

 

The bright voice of the five-year-old boy rang out one afternoon, his small, fair hand clinging tightly to his older friend's sleeve as they walked through the market, with servants following closely. Today, P'Klao was sick, and P'Phop had travelled out of town with his family, leaving only P'Jom to play with him. P'Jom wanted to go to the market, so they asked for permission from his mother, who instructed the servants to keep a close watch on them. Thus, the two boys were able to wander around the floating market near their house.

 

“P’Jom, can we stop to buy rock sugar?"

 

"If you eat too much sugar, you'll get fat like a barrel. Your teeth are already decayed, and you still want to get fat, too?"

 

P'Jom frowned. It was true; his front teeth were already decayed and had fallen out. But sweets and little kids go hand in hand, so Kaew kept asking.

 

"I'll eat just a little. I won't get fat."

 

"No way. When have you ever eaten just a little sweet?" His three years senior scolded him.

 

"But I want it," the little boy whined, looking up at the taller one with pleading eyes, hoping to soften his heart.

 

Even at a young age, P'Jom's handsome features were already evident, making Kaew always envious of his good looks, hoping that one day he'd grow up to be just as good-looking. P'Jom was about to say something when they heard a voice from the side.

 

"Isn't that Kaew?"

 

It was the voice of the merchant children who often ran around the market. When Kaew saw them approaching, he frowned in displeasure. He'd tried playing with them once, but they played too roughly and taunted him for being skinny, so he didn't want to play with those mean kids again.

 

"It is! The skinny shrimp is at the market again."

 

"I'm not a skinny shrimp!" Kaew retorted angrily, but they ignored him.

 

"Look, isn't Kaew missing teeth?" One of the kids pointed, and Kaew's face fell as they burst into laughter.

 

"He's really missing teeth! Hahaha, Kaew is missing teeth!"

 

"Kaew is uglier than ever! Hahaha!"

 

"Go away!" Kaew yelled, tears welling up in his eyes. But then the person next to him grabbed his wrist and pulled him away.

 

"Don't listen to them. Come with me." P'Jom whispered, pulling him along to the boat and ordering the servants to row back home. Being mocked made Kaew lose his confidence. Unlike other kids his age, he was often teased for being skinny and pale. Losing his front teeth only made it worse. The little boy sat sadly all the way back. Even when P'Jom tried to cheer him up by playing horse-riding games when they got home, he wasn't in the mood. He just sat with tears in his eyes until his brother knelt down to comfort him.

 

"Don't be sad. Last year, I was just like you."

 

The older one's hand rested on his slumped shoulder. Kaew looked up, tears still in his eyes, and asked shakily.

 

"You... you were missing teeth too?"

 

"Yes, and I looked worse than you. You only lost two teeth; I lost three!"

 

P'Jom held up three fingers, trying his best to cheer him up. When he saw Kaew still looking glum, he squeezed his shoulder gently.

 

"But soon, your teeth will grow back. It won't take long."

 

"Really?"

 

"Really. I'm older than you, and I'm going to be a doctor. Why wouldn't you believe in a doctor?"

 

P'Jom said with a serious tone, looking very convincing to five-year-old Kaew.

“Besides, even if you're missing teeth, you're still cute. You don't have to listen to their nonsense."

 

His older friend gently patted his head. Kaew was a bit stunned before a bright smile slowly spread across his face.

 

"I'm still cute?"

 

"Of course. To me, you're the cutest." P'Jom confirmed firmly. Hearing that, Kaew's troubled heart calmed down.

 

At that time, Kaew didn't know what love was. He only knew that his heart swelled with joy. It was strange that no matter how much his parents praised him for being cute, it never made him as happy as when P'Jom did. In Kaew's eyes, P'Jom was the best.

 

From then on, the little boy's eyes were always on this older brother. As he grew up, his innocent admiration slowly changed. P'Jom became a handsome young man admired by many girls, and he enjoyed flirting with them. Even though Kaew, at ten years old, didn't understand romantic affection, he couldn't help but feel annoyed when his older one seemed happy to receive attention from others. He often inserted himself, acting up to get P'Jom's attention. Luckily, P'Jom still valued him more than flirting with girls, so his brother hadn't started dating anyone yet. Until one day.

 

"P'Jom, are those flowers for me?" Twelve-year-old Kaew asked when he saw the older boy picking flowers in the garden and arranging them into a bouquet. His fair hand reached out to take them, but P'Jom moved them away.

 

"No, they're for Nuan."

 

"Who's Nuan?"

 

"She's the girl who likes me."

 

At that moment, Kaew's heart seemed to stop. The boy's mouth hung open, staring at P'Jom, now a fifteen-year-old young man, ready for marriage, in disbelief. P'Jom had never shown interest in anyone more than him, never valued anyone more than him. But now, P'Jom was going to give flowers to another girl...

 

"Nuan is very pretty. I like her a lot. Do you think these flowers are beautiful, or should I find other ones?"

 

"I like P'Jom, too!" A clear, youthful voice burst out suddenly. P'Jom paused, turning to look at him with a puzzled expression.

 

"What did you just say?"

 

"I like you. I want to marry you!" Kaew repeated earnestly, but the listener responded with a hearty laugh. "Kaew, you're a man, and I'm a man. How can we love and marry each other?

 

"I don't care. I like you. When I grow up, I'll marry you!" The boy declared with determination. Even though the person he intended to spend his future with didn't take it seriously, thinking it was just a child's words, twelve-year-old Kaew held firm in his resolution.

 

The boy followed P'Jom everywhere, clinging to him like a shadow, announcing to everyone that held marry P'Jom when he grew up. At first, no one paid much attention to his words, not even his parents. But as Kaew began to mature and continued to openly court P'Jom, those around him realised that he hadn't been joking.

 

The youngest son of Ok-phra Sinthara-nurak was a man who liked other men. A Lunatic, a disgrace, a curse to the family. These were the words of gossip and scorn that Kaew had grown accustomed to hearing. After shedding many tears, he was fortunate that his parents didn't care about the criticisms. They comforted him when he cried, took care of him, and never forced or scolded him to the point of making him feel guilty. He wished to stop liking P'Jom and turn to liking girls like other boys, so his parents wouldn't be criticised for not raising their son properly. But in the end, he couldn't force his feelings, and they grew deeper every day. Kaew fell in love with P'Jom with all his heart, while the others still saw it as a joke.

 

"P'Jom, I really like you."

 

One day, when Kaew was about seventeen, he said it again. The next day would be P'Jom's first day working as a doctor. Kaew had ordered the servants to make the best sweets and brought them in a tiffin carrier to congratulate him at his house.

 

"You're still young. Can you distinguish between romantic love and general liking?"

 

The large hand of his now fully grown man rested on his head, ruffling his hair gently. Kaew liked it when P'Jom touched him, but he didn't like his words.

 

"I'm not a child anymore. I'm seventeen. I can get married now."

 

"Then you should start looking for a woman."

 

"No, I won't look for any woman. I'll marry you."

 

His companion's eyes flashed with tension for a moment before P'Jom's familiar, playful smile returned.

 

"Winning my heart won't be easy. Keep trying."

 

"Alright!" The smaller young man responded with determination, feeling a surge of confidence as he set out to win the heart of the man before him.

 

But as time passed, Kaew found it was impossible. P'Jom was very firm. Even though he took care of Kaew and worried about him like when they were younger, it was always in a brotherly manner. Sometimes, Kaew thought P’Jom cared for him more than as a brother, but seeing P'Jom's irritation whenever he visited often made those hopeful thoughts disappear, leaving him disheartened. 

 

P'Jom even openly courted women in front of him, making it clear that there was no hope, urging him to give up. Kaew thought P'Jom valued their brotherly relationship since childhood and didn't want to hurt his feelings by outright rejecting him. But the young man stubbornly refused to give up, believing he could eventually win P'Jom's heart. Sometimes, Kaew felt pathetic for chasing after someone else's love for so many years. He felt sorry for P'Jom for having to endure his actions. Many times, Kaew felt selfish but didn't know how to stop himself. He tried to give up many times, but seeing P'Jom's face made all his resolutions vanish. If not P'Jom, Kaew didn't know who else he could love. So, he decided to fight for his one-sided love with all his might. As long as P'Jom didn't outright reject him, Kaew wouldn't give up. But that day finally came.

 

"Yes. I never liked you that way. I didn't want to say much before because you were young. But since you won't listen, I'll be straightforward. Stop bothering me."

 

Those words instantly turned Kaew's sunny day into a gloomy one. The young man's hand, holding the tiffin carrier, trembled. The wound from a knife cut, caused by his attempt to make P'Jom's favourite lotus stem soup, still stung. But the pain from the wound was nothing compared to the hurt from P'Jom's words.

 

".. I understand." It took a while for the young man to respond. Though tears began to flow, Kaew wiped them away and took a deep breath.

 

"I understand that everything I did was in vain. I like you, even if you don't like me. But you see me as a nuisance, right? Fine. I won't bother you anymore."

 

His eyes burned, and tears flowed. Kaew tried to wipe them away, but they kept coming. He felt pathetic for crying in front of the person who hurt him. Seeing P'Jom's indifferent face made his heart ache even more.

 

"'... hic... I never thought you'd be this cruel. I shouldn't have liked you. Just wait. If there's a next life, I'll make you like me, and I won't even look at you!"

 

He spun and ran out of the Phraya's house, heading back to his own. People might say men shouldn't cry, but men are human, too. They feel joy and sorrow. Why shouldn't he cry when he's this sad?

 

Kaew returned home, locked himself in his room, and cried for a long time. Though he didn't want to admit it, he knew P'Jom had been patient with him. It was Kaew who'd been stubborn, refusing to accept the truth. Now that P'Jom had lost patience and spoken plainly, it was evident that there was no hope.

 

Kaew knew it was time to give up. From that day on, Kaew didn't see P'Jom again. The young man intentionally stayed home, not going out as he used to, and was unable to face the cruel man again. P'Jom didn't come to see him either. Their close relationship since childhood seemed to have ended the moment those cutting words were spoken.

 

Not seeing each other is good. It'll help me move on faster, Kaew consoled himself. But deep down, he still longed for P'Jom every second. He'd loved P'Jom for so long; moving on so soon was impossible. Kaew thought time would heal his heart, but months passed, and the pain didn't lessen. Everywhere he looked in his house reminded him of his time with P'Jom, from childhood to adulthood.

 

They'd played together in the garden, Kaew had rested his head on P’Jom's lap while he sang lullabies at the riverside pavilion, and P'Jom had joined their meals at the veranda. Even in his bedroom when Kaew was sick, P'Jom had been the one to check on him, brew medicine, and stay by his side… Would leaving this place lessen the pain?

 

Kaew decided to discuss with his parents moving to live with his uncle in Pak Nam Pho. His uncle held the Ok-phra position in the province and had enough connections to help him get a government job. Kaew planned to start a new life there. Though sad to leave his family, he thought it'd be better than staying in a place filled with memories of him and P'Jom.

 

Kaew stayed home, diligently studying to prepare for his government job. Though his mind was still troubled, having a goal helped him forget his pain for a while. During this time, Kaew heard that P'Jom was working hard and that P'Phop and P'Klao had decided to live together. Feelings of joy and envy mixed in the young man's heart. He felt sad that he wasn't as lucky. But it was pointless to dwell on the past. It seemed he truly had no fate with P'Jom.

 

Time passed, and Kaew was preparing to move to another town. Unexpectedly, one day, while talking with P'Kao, who'd come to visit, he saw P'Jom running and panting into his house after months of not seeing each other.

 

"Are you moving to Pak Nam Pho?"

 

The deep, breathless voice asked as P'Klao excused himself, leaving them alone. Kaew didn't know how P'Jom had heard the news. Perhaps P'Phop or P'Klao had told him. His round eyes gazed at the one man who'd captured his heart. 

 

P'Jom seemed to have darker circles under his eyes than he remembered, but he was still as handsome as ever, making his heart race just the same.

 

"Yes." The young man lifted his chin, forcing himself to appear strong. If P'Jom knew that even after all these months, he still couldn't move on, it'd be utterly embarrassing.

 

"Don't worry. From now on, I won't bother you anymore, just as you wish. I'll forget you completely, start a new life, marry a lovely woman, and I will-"

 

"I won't let you go."

 

Those words stopped the thin lips chattering away instantly. Kaew's mouth hung open, unsure if he'd misheard.

 

"What did you just say?"

 

"I won't let you go."

 

The other repeated. Kaew bit his lip, his heart starting to beat faster.

 

"Why would you say that? You were the one who pushed me away. Now that I'm leaving, you won't have to be troubled by me anymore."

 

"I don't want you to go."

 

A rough hand grabbed his arm. The sharp eyes that Kaew liked to glance at secretly were filled with a mix of seriousness and pleading. Instead of feeling happy that P'Jom seemed to care, Kaew felt like he was being toyed with.

 

"What is wrong with you?" The young man shook off the hand, tears welling up as he looked up at the taller man. "You pushed me away just the other day, and now you say you don't want me to go. Do you think I'm a fool? Do I have to do everything you say?"

 

There was no answer from the man in front of him. The lack of response only made his suppressed feelings of hurt and disappointment rise above reason.

 

"Answer me. What do you really want from me!?" Kaew walked up and pushed the other man's chest, repeating the same words over and over as tears streamed down his face.

 

"Am I not pathetic enough? If you don't love me, just let me go. Why are you holding on to me?"

 

"I love you!"

 

Those words made the world stop spinning. Time itself seemed to freeze.

 

"I'm sorry."

 

The deep voice was barely louder than a whisper. Kaew stood still, eyes wide as the tall figure walked up and hugged him tightly, leaving him bewildered.

 

"What did you say? You love me?"

 

"Yes, I love you. I've always loved you. But back then, I was too worried about what others would say. I cared too much about others' opinions and ended up hurting you."

 

The strong arms tightened around him, the deep voice trembling.

 

"I'm sorry for everything. Now I know I can't live without you. Please don't leave, Kaew. I can't live without you."

 

"But... but I'm a man, "Kaew sobbed, crying so hard his body shook. "Didn't you reject me just because I'm a man?"

 

"It doesn't matter if you're a man, a woman, or any gender. As long as it's you, I'll love you."

 

Everything was happening so fast, it felt unreal. Kaew felt like he was dreaming. If the arms around him weren't holding him so tightly, if he couldn't hear the racing heartbeat of the person in front of him, he'd never believe it.

 

"Really... really?"

 

"Really."

 

The confirmation made him smile through his tears. Kaew wrapped his arms around the other's waist, holding on tightly. The tears still flowed, but now they were no longer tears of pain. Finally, he'd found happiness in love.

════[changbins_delulu_wife]════

 

The sound of a vibrating phone broke the silence. Morning sunlight streamed through the curtains, piercing the eyelids of the person sleeping on the bed.

 

Pun slowly opened his heavy eyelids, reaching for his phone on the bedside table to check the time. Even though he didn't want to wake up, he had an 8 a.m. class with a very punctual professor. So, he had no choice but to fight off the sleepiness and drag himself to the bathroom to get ready for class. His eyebrows furrowed slightly as he recalled his dream from last night. He couldn't remember the details very well, but it seemed like P'Kun was in it. Oh, and P'Thi, too, dressed in traditional attire with a Mahad-Thai hairstyle...

 

Goodness, he must've been watching too many period dramas, which have been all the rage lately, dreaming up such vivid scenarios. And dreaming that he was chasing after P'Thi in the Ayutthaya era? Ridiculous.

 

Pun shook his head at his own wild imagination, grabbed a towel and headed to the bathroom. Fifteen minutes later, he was dressed in his student uniform, ready to leave his condo for class.

 

"Pun."

 

A deep voice called out as he was about to leave. He looked up to see his tall senior with striking blonde hair getting up from the sofa in the guest area and walking towards him.

 

"P'Thi, you're here again?"

 

"Of course, I promised to pick you up for class every day."

 

P'Thi flashed a wide smile, showing his fangs. This senior had been pursuing him since his freshman year, and over a year later, he still hadn't given up.

 

P'Thi had said he was his first love. Pun felt a connection with him, too. Did he like P'Thi? Probably, but P’Thi seemed quite the flirt, so Pun was hesitant to believe him. He didn't dare agree to be his boyfriend, fearing he might get hurt someday.

 

"You don't have to trouble yourself. I can go on my own."

 

"It's no trouble at all if it's for you, Pun."

 

The older man spoke sweetly, taking his bag to carry for him. That's how it is during the courting phase: top-notch service.

 

"Seriously, P'Thi, don't you get tired of picking me up every day?" Pun asked, puzzled. After all this time, P'Thi had never wavered in his efforts to woo him. Despite being good-looking and having many admirers, P'Thi had a reputation for being quite the player. So why had he suddenly changed?

 

"Not at all. I told you, I like you. I'll pick you up every day until you agree to be my boyfriend."

 

P’Thi smiled widely, his eyes squinting. That smile made Pun's heart race, but he hid his feelings well.

 

"Suit yourself. Let's go, or we'll be late."

 

"Sure thing," P’Thi said, grabbing his hand and leading him out.

 

Pun looked up at the person beside him, and for a moment, the image from his dream overlapped with reality, making him chuckle at how the two were so reversed.

 

"What are you laughing at, Pun?" P'Thi asked.

 

"Nothing, really," Pun replied with a smile, glancing at his senior, who was unlocking the car. He thought to himself that he'd wait a little longer, just to be sure. If Thi still hadn't changed his mind by then, he'd agree to be his boyfriend