Love Upon A Time.

Ancient Past.

My phone's alarm buzzed, welcoming the new day. I groggily opened my eyes and reached for my phone to check the time. Seven-thirty on a Saturday morning was still too early for most college students who'd been grinding through their studies all week. But not for me- I'd been eagerly waiting for this day. Today, I had a study session planned with P'Phop.

 

I turned off the alarm, sprang out of bed, and stretched to shake off the sleepiness. Then, I grabbed my towel and hurried to shower and change clothes enthusiastically. About thirty minutes later, dressed in a black T-shirt and navy jeans, I was ready to head out. I stopped in front of the mirror and picked up a comb to tame my messy bangs. After applying a bit of colourless lip balm, I checked my reflection one last time. Satisfied with my appearance, I smiled.

 

Honestly, I never thought I'd have a moment like this with anyone. I'd picked out this outfit the night before, spending nearly half an hour rummaging through my closet. Before bed, I even debated what hairstyle to go with and whether to wear cologne. It was just a study session, but it felt more like a date to me. The study session was just an excuse. The introductory law course wasn't that hard; I could study it on my own. My grades had slipped in my first year because I focused too much on my major subjects and neglected the others. I figured I could catch up later. If I really needed a tutor, Thi could help me. But I asked P'Phop to tutor me just to get closer to him. Now, I was more focused on my appearance and finding topics to chat with P'Phop about than on studying.

 

The session was at ten-thirty, but I was ready by eight. Guess how excited I was?

I stared at my reflection in the mirror. Since coming back from Thi's place, my eyes have seemed more lively. I felt like the old Nakun before I travelled back in time, genuinely happy and not just pretending for others' sake. My friends even teased me, saying I looked like I was in love. Not exactly, but close. I was really falling in love.

 

I checked my phone. There was still plenty of time before the meeting, so I decided to grab breakfast at the restaurant below my dorm. Early in the morning, most students were still asleep, so I was alone, shovelling porridge into my mouth. While eating, I scrolled through my phone and opened the LINE app to message someone.

 

'Good morning.' I typed the message, my heart pounding as I sent a short greeting along with a good-morning sticker to P'Phop. Since coming back from this place, I've been trying to find reasons to message him every day. The simplest way was to say good morning. After sending the message, I continued eating my porridge, glancing at my phone every five seconds, hoping for a reply. I'd never been this eager to check my phone before. The last time I was this anxious was when waiting for my university admission results.

 

Ding!

In less than two minutes, a reply came. I quickly put down my spoon and opened the chat, smiling widely at P'Phop's message.

 

'Good morning.'

'You're up early.'

 

How could I not be? I barely slept last night, eagerly waiting to see him. He probably had no idea. I set an alarm to make sure I wouldn't oversleep.

 

‘P'Phop, you're up early too!'

 

‘went for a run.'

 

His reply didn't surprise me. He used to wake up early to practice fencing with the servants. Now, he wakes up to run. He's really into staying healthy.

 

‘I'll see you soon.'

 

I couldn't stop smiling when P'Phop replied. Initially, I was hesitant to message him, afraid of bothering him. But Thi encouraged me to message him often, so I mustered the courage to start on Monday. We'd been chatting about various topics since then. I don't know if he realised I was trying to get closer to him, but he always replied quickly. Sometimes, he even initiated the conversation. This gave me some relief that I wasn't annoying him. This was my first time flirting with someone, so I was a bit clumsy. I still couldn't shake off the suspicion that P'Phop remembered our past. His behaviour towards me was similar to before. I tried to ask subtly, but chatting wasn't as effective as talking face-to-face. Today was my chance to find out. As for the study session, well, whatever.

 

After finishing my porridge, I went back to my room to gather my things. I'd arranged to meet P'Phop at a mall near Siam Square, so I planned to leave the dorm around nine and wander around until he arrived. While packing my books and lecture notes into my backpack, my eyes fell on a ring box on my desk. I picked up the ring box, lost in thought. Should I wear it? This was the engagement ring P'Phop had given me. If he saw it, he might feel a sense of familiarity or remember something. But it might be too soon. From our conversations, he treated me politely. If I were optimistic, he seemed attentive. But from a neutral perspective, it was just friendly treatment. I couldn't tell what he really thought of me. I also worried that if I pushed too hard, he might find me annoying or think I was crazy.

 

Ding!

The sound of a new message snapped me out of my thoughts. I put the ring box down and checked my phone. To my surprise, it was a message from P'Phop.

 

‘Im waiting in front of your dorm.'

 

Wait, what? Is he here to pick me up? I quickly grabbed my backpack and room keycard, then rushed downstairs. When I reached the lobby, I saw P'Phop sitting on the guest sofa. Today, he was wearing a navy shirt with rolled-up sleeves, jeans, and leather shoes. His bangs were down, and he wore his usual silver-framed glasses. It was a casual look, but he looked incredibly good, drawing the attention of passing students. My heart raced when he smiled at me.

 

"Good morning, Nakun."

 

So handsome, it's almost unfair. Sometimes, I envy his looks so much.

 

"Good morning. How did you know my dorm? Did Thi tell you?" I greeted him with a wai and asked, glancing behind him as he walked towards me. I couldn't meet his eyes directly. Even though we were about the same height, I always felt smaller around P'Phop, whether in the past or present.

 

"Yes, I asked him."

 

"You didn't have to come pick me up. It's a hassle for you."

 

"It's no hassle."

 

P'Phop shook his head slightly, his sharp eyes behind the glasses scanning me before he said something that made my face heat up.

 

"You look cute today."

 

"Th-thank you. You look good, too." I stammered, caught off guard by his sudden compliment. The situation was awkward but not uncomfortable. On the contrary, I felt incredibly happy.

 

"Have you had breakfast?"

 

"Yes, I asked him."

 

"You didn't have to come pick me up. It's a hassle for you."

 

"It's no hassle."

 

P'Phop shook his head slightly, his sharp eyes behind the glasses scanning me before he said something that made my face heat up.

 

"You look cute today."

 

“Th-thank you. You look good, too." I stammered, caught off guard by his sudden compliment. The situation was awkward but

not uncomfortable. On the contrary, I felt incredibly happy.

 

"Have you had breakfast?"

 

"Yes, I have. What about you?"

 

“I’ve eaten too. Shall we go?"

 

"Sure." I nodded and followed him to his car parked beside the dorm. His white Mercedes looked familiar, and a memory flashed in my mind as I sat in the passenger seat.

 

Last year, Thi had borrowed this car when his Audi broke down. He said it belonged to his cousin and even showed me a picture. But I didn't pay much attention then. If I had, I might've met P'Phop sooner.

Oh, Nakun, you idiot-

 

"Final exams are coming up, right? You must be studying hard." P'Phop's voice broke through the soft background music playing in the car, making me jump a little.

 

"Yeah, only three weeks left. I'm also working on my research. I have to present it next week."

 

"Thi has been complaining about being tired too. Make sure to rest and not overwork yourself."

 

P'Phop glanced at me with a gentle smile as the car stopped at a red light. I smiled back, rubbing my arms as the air conditioning made me feel cold.

 

"Are you cold? Here, take my jacket."

 

Before I could open my mouth to ask him to turn down the air conditioning, P'Phop reached behind, grabbed his suit jacket from the back seat, and leaned in to drape it over me. Warmth flooded my heart as I stared blankly at his sharp features, just inches away.

 

"Thank you," i murmured.

 

P'Phop locked eyes with me. For a moment, it seemed like he wanted to say something, but then a car horn blared from behind us. I turned to see that the traffic light had turned green. P'Phop gave me a small smile, pulled back, and focused on the road, pressing the accelerator to get the car moving.

 

"Kun."

 

"Yes?"

 

"I heard from Thi that your home isn't in Bangkok, right?" P'Phop started the conversation.

 

"Oh, no. My home is in Chachoengsao. I only moved to Bangkok when I got into university."

 

"Chachoengsao isn't far. You can visit your family on weekends, right?”

 

“Yes, I used to go home every weekend. But now that I'm in my fourth year, I have so much work that 1 rarely go back. Finding time to sleep is hard enough." I began to complain, and once I started, I couldn't stop. From being tense and hesitant to speak, I ended up talking non-stop, sharing various stories, and asking P'Phop questions in return.

 

We took turns sharing stories about our families and school days. The half-hour journey was filled with conversation and laughter, with background music playing in the car. Saturday morning traffic wasn't as bad as on weekdays. Once we passed this intersection, we'd reach our destination. P'Phop tapped his fingers on the steering wheel in rhythm with the music while I gazed out the window, relaxing to the song that had reached its chorus.

 

“I have died every day waiting for you

Darling, don't be afraid

I have loved you for a thousand years

I'll love you for a thousand more"

 

The soft, deep voice singing along made my heart race. I turned to look at the singer and found P'Phop glancing at me, too.

 

"And all along, I believed I would find you

Time has brought your heart to me

I have loved you for a thousand years

I've loved you for a thousand more"

 

"How's my singing?" he asked with a smile after finishing the verse.

 

"..It's good," I replied absentmindedly, my heart both fluttering and filled with curiosity. Was it a coincidence that he chose this song and sang this particular verse? If it was, it was an unbelievable coincidence. Or, if it wasn't a coincidence, was he trying to tell me something with those words?

 

I sat there, debating whether to ask directly. But before I could, the traffic light turned green again. P'Phop shifted his focus back to the road, and I looked down at my hands, regretting not wearing my ring. It's okay. There will be another chance. Besides, we've only known each other for a week. Asking about that might be too soon. Let's just test the waters today.

 

At ten in the morning, Siam Square wasn't too crowded yet, so we managed to find a vacant seat in a coffee shop. I went to claim a table while P'Phop ordered drinks. He soon returned with my green tea frappe and his iced Americano.

 

"How much?" I asked, pulling out my wallet to pay him back.

 

"No need. It's on me."

 

"No way. You're already tutoring me. I can't let you pay for me, too. I'd feel bad."

 

"Don't worry about it. I want to."

 

He refused to take my money, beaming and shaking his head. In the end, I had to give in and let him treat me.

 

"Let's study for two hours and then grab something to eat, okay?

 

"Sure," I agreed, pulling out my books, notes, and lecture sheets from my backpack and placing them on the table. P'Phop skimmed through the sheets briefly before starting the tutoring session. Even though my real intention wasn't to study, I listened attentively, absorbing as much knowledge as I could. 

 

Since P'Phop graduated from the Faculty of Law, he didn't even need the books for the introductory law course for first-year students. He could explain everything just by looking at the topics.

 

"If you're confused, just remember that administrative laws are public laws, while civil and commercial laws are private laws."

 

His deep, soft voice continued explaining. I took notes while occasionally glancing at P'Phop, smiling slightly as I saw his focused expression. It reminded me of the past when he taught me to read and write and helped me review for civil service exams. I thought about how, despite the different times and places, the person sitting next to me was still the same, and warmth spread through my chest. I'm really lucky we met again.

 

Two hours of intense studying flew by quickly. By noon, I was exhausted, and my stomach started growling for food. Seeing that I was tired, P'Phop suggested we take a break and find something to eat.

 

"You're really good at tutoring. You must've done it often," I said casually as we walked around looking for a restaurant, hoping to see if he remembered our past. He used to tutor me back then, too.

 

"Mostly, I studied in groups with friends and took turns tutoring each other. But one-on-one, I only did it with you."

 

"Really?"

 

"Yes." He replied casually, meeting my eyes. I paused, unsure if he meant just in the present or if he was referring to the past.

 

"P'Phop... you..."

 

"How about this place? It's not too crowded."

 

'Phop suggested just as I was about to ask. I looked up at the sign of the Thai fusion restaurant and decided to let my curiosity go for now, nodding in agreement and following him inside. Luckily, we got a seat by the window, a quiet corner where we could continue studying after eating.

 

"This time, you can't treat me. We'll split the bill," I insisted after the waiter took our order.

 

"P'Phop, don't ignore me."

 

"Let's eat first, and then we'll see."

 

He chuckled softly without agreeing. I scrunched my nose and glared at him. Back in the day, when we went to the market together, he always paid for everything. I even thought jokingly that if we ever went to a mall together, I'd spend all his money. I never thought we'd actually go to a mall together one day, and he'd still be treating me. I guess being a generous spender is in his nature.

 

"Oh, Phop!"

 

As we started eating, a woman's sweet voice greeted the person sitting across from me. I looked up from my plate of fried rice with chilli paste and saw a familiar face. I froze.

 

"Hi, Nam."

 

P'Phop turned and greeted her warmly. She smiled widely, and I couldn't take my eyes off her because she looked exactly like

Wanna, P'Phop's former fiancée.

 

“I’m here with friends. I saw you and wasn't sure if it was you. What a coincidence to run into you here."

 

"Yeah, it is," P'Phop replied to Wanna, no, Miss Nam, with a smile. My heart, which had been soaring since the morning, started to deflate.

From their conversation, it seemed they were quite close.

 

"Are you here with your cousin, Phop?"

 

"No, this is... a junior. His name is Kun. I'm helping him with his law studies," P'Phop introduced me, so I greeted Miss Nam with a wai.

 

"Oh, hello, Kun. I'm Nam, a friend from Phop's faculty."

 

She returned my wai with a bright smile, and I smiled back politely. I couldn't describe how I felt. Thi said P'Phop didn't have a girlfriend, but that didn't mean he wasn't interested in someone.

 

Nam chatted with P'Phop for a few more minutes before returning to her friends. I watched her walk away, thinking that she was still a lovely and charming woman in both past and present, catching everyone's eye. I saw several men in the restaurant looking at her.

 

"Kun." P'Phop's deep voice pulled me back to reality. His dark eyes were hard to read as I turned to look at him.

 

"Yes?"

 

"Why were you looking at my friend like that?"

 

"Oh, well... she's cute, so I looked," I quickly made up an excuse. How could I tell him I was looking because Nam resembled his former fiancée and might now be a rival?

 

"Do you like her?" P'Phop asked in a calm voice. Suddenly, his lively eyes turned solemn, reminding me of when the school disciplinarian checked my uniform. I hurriedly waved my hands and denied it.

 

"No, it's not like that."

 

"Good. I thought you liked my friend."

 

His stern expression relaxed immediately. It was clear he didn't like me asking about Nam, so I decided to test the waters.

 

"And if I did like her, would that be a problem? Or is she someone you have eyes for?

 

"No, I don't have eyes for her," he replied right away, a faint, meaningful smile playing on his lips as he continued.

 

"I have eyes for someone else."

 

Those sharp eyes locked onto mine. Even with the glasses partially obscuring them, it didn't lessen the feeling that his gaze was piercing through my thoughts. My face started to heat up as he refused to look away, but not wanting to back down, I held his gaze and asked back.

 

"Who?"

 

"Who do you think?" he asked, smiling.

 

"Someone as handsome as you probably has his eyes for some cute girl, right?" I looked at him, waiting for an answer. He chuckled softly and stared at me.

 

"Maybe not a girl, but definitely someone cute."

 

"The person I have eyes for is very cute."

 

Damn, is he talking about me? If he is, then he's still as smooth as ever, no matter the lifetime.

 

"Oh... that person must be really enviable to have someone as good as you liking them," I deflected, pretending not to catch the hint in his words.

 

Maybe he isn't talking about you, after all, Kun. Let's not get ahead of ourselves...

 

"I think you don't need to be envious, Kun."

His eyes sparkled clearly. I swallowed and quickly looked away.

 

"Let's eat... before the food gets cold," I finally changed the subject, feeling flustered. P'Phop seemed to notice because he kept smiling at me. I quickly stuffed a boiled egg into my mouth to hide my embarrassment. So he's really talking about me, huh? Whether it's Muun Phop or Tinnaphop, he's still as sly as ever. Damn it!

 

The food on our plates was gone, but P'Phop and I were still sitting in the restaurant. We ordered dessert and drinks while studying for a few more hours. By the time P'Phop said we should stop, I felt like my soul had left my body. No matter how many centuries pass, when he turns into a teacher, he's still as strict with his students.

 

"You look exhausted. Tired?" P'Phop asked, his teacher mode gone. He laughed as he looked at me slumped over the table.

 

"Of course, I'm tired. I don't want to take the exam anymore. I want to go on a trip." I sat back in my chair and looked at the study sheets and books piled on the table.

 

"Where do you like to go on trips?"

 

"I like playing in the water, so I want to go to the beach." My eyes dimmed as I mentioned a place someone once promised to take me.  Back then, P'Phop and I were supposed to go to Bang Lamung together in less than a week, but that became a distant past that would never happen.

 

"How about we go to the beach after the exams? Bang Lamung, Pattaya has beautiful beaches and is close to Bangkok."

 

"What?" I froze when I heard that. Could it be a coincidence that he mentioned Bang Lamung?

 

"Do you want to go? I'm tired too and want to go on a trip. We can invite Thi as well." He asked again, and I nodded. Still curious about what he had said earlier, I tried to observe his behaviour, but P'Phop showed no signs of suspicion. I started to wonder if I was overthinking it. How many coincidences have there been today?

 

"Let's go for a walk to stretch our legs and relieve some stress."

 

P'Phop suggested calling a waiter to check the bill. Then he took me for a walk to look at clothes and accessories and buy snacks at the market outside the mall. Normally, I don't like crowded places and hot weather, but walking next to P'Phop, chatting, and pointing things out to each other made me happier than being alone.

 

We walked until we stopped in front of a silver jewellery shop. I stood eating ice cream, looking at the various accessories with interest. I glanced at P'Phop and saw a complex look in his eyes as if he was deep in thought. I thought about the past, too. Back then, we stood in front of a jewellery shop. I looked at a carved gold ring but decided not to buy it. But P'Phop secretly bought it and gave it to me.

 

"P'Phop."

 

"Yes, what is it?"

 

He turned to look at me. I hesitated for a moment before deciding to ask indirectly.

 

"Do you like wearing jewellery? You've been looking at it for a while."

 

"No, I don't usually like wearing jewellery. I was just thinking about someone."

 

He smiled, half happy, half sad, his eyes dimming for a moment. But when I blinked, his eyes were back to normal.

 

"Who are you thinking about?" I ask.

 

He didn't answer; he just smiled slightly and looked at me. I wasn't sure if that was a hint or if he didn't want me to pry into his personal life, so I didn't ask further.

 

"What about you? Do you like jewellery?" he asked back.

 

"I wear some, like earrings, rings, and necklaces," I replied, leaning in to look at the silver earrings in the glass case. I wear jewellery like any other teenager, but don't buy much because it's expensive.

 

"Do you like this pair?"

 

He stepped closer. I nodded, thinking about taking out my wallet, but then decided it was too expensive.

 

"P'Phop, let's go," I invited him to leave the shop. He quirked an eyebrow.

 

"You're not buying it?"

 

"It's expensive. I don't want to spend the money."

 

"Do you want them? I'll buy them for you."

 

Without waiting for my response, he called the shop owner to unlock the case. I was stunned, trying to refuse, but in the end, P'Phop bought the earrings for me. Come to think of it, I hadn't spent any money today. Even though I suggested we split, P'Phop paid for it all. He said I was still a student and he was working, so he didn't feel right making me pay.

 

"Are you rich or something? Treating me all day like this," I asked as P'Phop drove me back to my dorm, examining the earring case. But I shouldn't have asked. With his Mercedes and big house, if he's not rich, then no one is.

 

“I don't treat everyone." He glanced at me briefly. "Only some people."

 

"Why do you treat me then?"

 

"Because I want to." He answered bluntly. Seeing me pout, his eyes sparkled with amusement. Does this teasing habit carry over from past lives? It's so annoying.

 

"Thank you so much for today. For tutoring me, driving me around, and treating me all day. When I start earning money. I'll treat you back." I raised my hands in a wai. His lips curved into a small smile.

 

"No need to repay me. I'm happy to do it."

 

The conversation ended there, leaving only the soft music playing in the car. P'Phop focused on driving while I sat in silence, feeling confused.

 

Normally, people wouldn't take care of someone they've just met for a week this much, right? Even if I was his cousin's friend, it was just that. If I looked at it positively, he might be interested in me, trying to flirt with me. Or if I overthought it, I felt like he might actually remember me.

 

"Kun, Nakun."

 

"Yes?"

 

I jumped when I heard P'Phop calling my name.

 

"We're here."

 

His deep voice said. I looked out the window and saw we were in front of my dorm. I was so lost in thought that I didn't notice.

 

“Oh, thank you for dropping me off. Drive back safely," I said, raising my hands in a wai and unbuckling my seatbelt, about to get out of the car.

 

"Sweet dreams."

 

He gave me a gentle smile. I stared into his eyes, and for a moment, it felt like time stopped. I was drawn to those eyes, unable to look away, just staring at the familiar face I missed so much. A wave of emotion surged in my chest, making my eyes burn.

 

It'd been years since I left the past. It'd been so long since I was embraced by his warm arms, hearing him say he loved me every night before bed. Even though I knew the hope was slim, I always prayed to return there, to see him again. Finally, today, I met him. Even if he's no longer Muun Phop, the soul inside is undoubtedly my P'Phop. I want to hug him...

 

"Kun, Kun."

 

"Yes...?"

 

"Are you okay?"

"..'  “I’m fine. You go ahead. Sweet dreams," 

 

I forced a smile before opening the car door. I watched him drive away until his white Mercedes disappeared around the corner. Then, I walked back to my dorm, still confused.

 

Bzzz

My phone buzzed just as I opened my dorm room door. I took it out of my pocket, raising an eyebrow when I saw it was a call from P'Phop.

 

"P'Phop, what's up?"

 

"You left your wallet in my car."

 

Hearing that, I quickly patted my pockets. My wallet was indeed missing.

 

"I'm turning the car around. Come down and wait in front of the building."

 

"Okay. Sorry for the trouble."

 

"It's no problem." He said with no hint of annoyance before hanging up.

 

I walked down to wait under the dormitory. With finals approaching, the students were gathered in groups, studying and reviewing their notes, filling up the entire area. The murmurs of their memorisation blended with the night breeze.

 

I looked up at the dark sky. Even though the lights of Bangkok obscured the stars, the full moon still shone brightly, just as it did in the past when I looked out from the pavilion at Phraya Pichaipakdee's house. I sank down onto an empty bench, lost in thought. I wasn't sure if I was overthinking, but I was worried about P'Phop's feelings. Even though he had the same spirit, different memories could affect his feelings. If I kept asking and trying to make him the same P'Phop as before, even though he couldn't remember the past, would he think I was trying to replace someone else with him? This made me hesitant to ask anything.

 

"Kun."

 

A familiar voice called out. When I turned to look, I saw P'Phop walking towards me, holding out my wallet.

 

"Thank you."

 

"No problem. I have to go now. See you next week. Don't forget to review your notes in the meantime."

 

P'Phop reminded me with a smile and started to walk away. Watching his back as he turned away, I felt a sudden emptiness. Fear surged up like a giant wave crashing against the shore. I didn't want to be separated from him again, but I was also afraid that if I asked, his reaction might change. It seemed like I had no other choice. If I didn't ask, I'd never know for sure, right?

 

"P'Phop, wait" Amid my confusion, I finally made up my mind. I quickly ran to block his path. He raised an eyebrow, looking at me puzzled.

 

"Yes?"

 

"Um... I have something personal I want to talk to you about. Can we... can we go up to my room for a bit?" I asked, holding my breath. P'Phop paused for a moment before responding with his usual gentle smile.

 

"Sure."

 

"Then.. let's go." I led him up to my room. Technically, outsiders weren't allowed in the dormitory, but most students often brought friends or partners to stay over, sneaking them in without the management noticing.

 

"What do you want to ask me?"

 

Once we were inside the room and the door was closed, P'Phop asked. I turned to face him, noticing that he didn't seem surprised at all about why I brought him up here, as if he knew what I was thinking.

 

"P'Phop," I called his name. The tension in the air was almost palpable, and I couldn't stand the ambiguity any longer.

 

"If I ask you something personal, would you think I'm being rude?"

 

"Go ahead and ask."

 

His sharp eyes behind the glasses never left mine. I bit my lip, hesitating for a moment before asking.

 

"Thi said you've never had a girlfriend. I want to know... why don't you have a girlfriend?"

 

"I'm waiting for someone. And now I've found them."

 

His answer made my whole body tingle, my heart racing with anticipation.

 

"And... and..." My mind was spinning as I tried to find a way to continue, but there was nothing better than asking directly and taking a chance all at once.

 

"I have one more question. It might sound strange, but can you answer honestly?"

 

"Sure." He replied. I tried to steady my voice by taking a deep breath.

 

"P’Phop."

 

"Yes?"

 

"Do you... Do you believe in reincarnation?"