Interminable

Chapter 21: As of Today.

Author ~  Sine

Translator ~ Changbins_Delulu_Wife

DJ Birdsong chirped melodiously as a gentle breeze idled past, nearly lulling the person in the rocking chair to sleep. But thoughts of someone special made her eyes snap open immediately.

 

"Where has that little rascal gone now?" The age-worn, husky voice asked the attendant sitting nearby, fanning at her side.

 

"Perhaps to that house yonder, Madam."

 

"Hmm?" The elderly woman raised an eyebrow before speaking in a displeased tone. "Go bring him back."

 

"Yes, Madam." At that exasperated command, the young servant girl leapt up and rushed off to retrieve the little master as commanded. The thick, overgrown trees made the already hushed atmosphere seem even more forlorn. The White Manor stood austere amid the silence, causing the girl sent to fetch the little boy to shudder with fear, afraid that something unearthly might spring forth to haunt her.

 

"Young master! Young master! Great-Great-Grandmother sent me to bring you back to the main house!" the girl called out, careful not to venture too near the building. She stood nervously beneath a Spanish cherry tree. Her awkward stance was almost comical until she gave a shriek and jumped when a small figure popped out from behind with a loud "Peekaboo!", sending her tumbling onto the grass with a solid thud. The scene drew peals of laughter from the mischievous child.

 

"What are you doing sitting there, Phi Porn? Hahaha!"

 

"Young master! I'm going to tell Madam that you teased me!" Tears sprang in the maid's eyes from shock as she blurted her threat, but the boy remained unruffled. He stuck out his tongue, pulled a face, and burst into loud laughter before darting back toward the veranda, to the waiting old lady.

 

"What now, you little imp? What did you do to poor Phi Porn today?" Great-Great-Grandmother peered over her glasses as the boy ran up to hug her affectionately around the waist.

 

"I just jumped out to surprise her, that's all, Great-Great-Grandmother." The child smiled widely, seeing nothing wrong with his actions.

 

"Just you wait. How could you frighten her like that?"The old woman swatted his small arm with a smart rap as a lesson. The boy flinched and pouted, tears pooling in those eyes. "Don't think a pout will save you, you little pixie!" Hearing this, the boy stifled his mock sob, seeing it was no use. "Haven't I told you not to go to that house?"

 

"Why not?" His winsome face tilted in query.

"That house is no place for children to play. It already has an owner."

 

"But I am the owner." The boy smiled in response, making his great-great-grandmother raise an eyebrow in puzzlement.

 

"No, child. It's not yours."

"Yes, it is! That house is mine, Great-Great-Grandmother!"

 

The boy looked up insistently, his delicate brows furrowing, not understanding why his Great-Great-Grandmother had to forbid it.

 

"Ugh, who told you that the house belongs to you?" Great-Great-Grandmother frowned, her wrinkled hand pushing the small boy back by the shoulder to examine his innocent face.

 

"No one told me, but I know. That house is mine." The boy smiled, his clear eyes bright with sincerity.

 

"But it's not yours. The owner of the White Manor..."

"That's me; I'm the owner." The crisp voice continued to insist steadfastly. Great-Great-Grandmother looked once more into the child's eyes.

 

"Kaew..."

 

She remembered the day her grandson arrived at the house, telling her that her granddaughter-in-law was near her time and wanted her to see the little one together with them. At first, she had harboured resentment toward that granddaughter-in-law. But the moment she saw the baby boy in his mother's arms, her heart called up someone she had thought of constantly-someone never far from her mind. She asked if the little one had a name yet. When she learned he did not, she spoke one name... Kaewta... the name of a friend long gone.

 

The tall man glanced down at the paper in his hand, standing beneath the sign that read 'Rom Ruedee' with a sigh. At last, he had reached his destination after walking for over twenty minutes through the narrow alley now being widened. Worse yet, the sun beat down pitilessly.

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The tall man looked down at the paper in his hand; upon seeing the signboard bearing the name Rom Ruedee,' he let out a sigh. At last, he had found his destination, after walking more than twenty minutes along a narrow lane presently being widened, his left cheek still smarting beneath the blazing sun. 

 

Rom Ruedee was a grand Thai-style residence to which he had been dispatched by his chairman soon after his transfer. The resident here held no executive post nor any connection to the company, yet he was told that she was Khun Sone's grandmother patron who had long supported and secured various projects for the firm. And so, at Khun Sone's urging, he was to pay his respects and cultivate a relationship for the work to come.

 

The man pressed the doorbell. When someone answered, he presented his letter; after reading it, they opened the gate. He drew a handkerchief from his jacket pocket and dabbed at the perspiration again and again in the heat, while wondering why the owner of Rom Ruedee had not built a wider road to the residence before the later expansion, then he could have avoided parking at the alley entrance and walking all this way.

 

"Please, take a seat while you wait." He nodded in acknowledgement. These routes were unfamiliar to him, having only recently returned to Thailand after his adoptive father had sent him abroad for his education since his earliest memory; that explained the delay. He settled into a cushioned armchair upholstered in soft pink roses and tipped his head back to take in the room. Cabinets displayed Benjarong and fine China, their age evident at a glance. Framed artwork with precise linework adorned both walls.

 

"So beautiful," the young man murmured with appreciation as he studied the drawing. "An older piece, I think." The yellowing paper betrayed its age-a monochrome rendering of the Chao Phraya riverside. His gaze traced to the lower corner, where Thai script spelt: Kaew.

 

"You must be the one Sone mentioned, the young man who just returned from abroad?" A voice, raspy with age, came from behind. Startled, the young man turned and offered a respectful wai in the Thai manner.

 

"Good afternoon," his deep, baritone voice carried an exotic cadence that brought a smile to his listener. However, when the tall young man raised his face, the recipient of his greeting nearly collapsed where she stood.

 

"Khun Phra Nai!"

 

"Sorry?" He glanced over, confused by her sudden pallor. The diminutive elderly woman staggered where she stood. The young servant-Porn-who had been standing beside her, quickly guided her to a chair, producing a fan from behind her waist to wave urgently. "Are you unwell? Shall I call for a doctor?" In his alarm, the young man switched to English.

 

"I'm well, just startled. You look very much like someone I knew." The elder responded in kind before straightening in her seat, studying the young man's features once more. So alike that it was as though he were the very same person.

 

Refined features framed by neat black hair; eyes, shadow-deep yet brightening when they lit on someone. An aristocratic nose balanced generous lips, shaped by a smile that left an immediate impression.

 

"Oh, I see," the young man marvelled, hearing the elderly woman converse in fluent English.

 

"What's your name, young man?"

 

"Phrawut, ma'am. Or you can call me Yai. I'm from XYZ Company. I came here on Khun Sone's recommendation," the young man replied with a gentle smile. The woman smiled fondly in return, though her expression held something he couldn't quite decipher. Was it longing?

 

"Oh, Sone is always sending people to see me." The elderly woman said with a laugh. She turned to gaze at a painting on the wall with profound eyes before falling silent. 

 

"You look like a man I knew. Even your name is the same."

"Is that so?"

 

"Can I call him a man?" She murmured to herself, then fixed her gaze on the young man once more.

 

"Though he wasn't human."

"Sorry?"

 

"Nothing, nothing." She waved her hand, laughing. "How did you get here? Did you walk in from the front entrance?" She asked upon seeing his sun-flushed face.

 

"I did. It was quite a walk, I must say." He admitted, lifting a glass of cool water to his lips. His slender brows furrowed as he caught the fragrance wafting from the glass.

 

"Good heavens! Didn't Sone tell you to take the boat to the landing behind the house? Poor thing, you've had to trek through all that heat." The young man smiled sheepishly. Khun Sone had mentioned it, but he hadn't known where to catch the boat.

 

"Well, now that you're here, why don't you stay for lunch?"

"But I..."

 

"You're not working today, are you? Besides, if Sone sent you to me, it's likely because he wants us to become acquainted."

 

"Well, I suppose, ma'am."

"Then stay. Let's get to know each other over a meal."

 

"Thank you," the young man raised his hands in a respectful wai, which impressed the elderly woman with his manners.

 

"Is there anything you can't eat?"

"Nothing, ma'am. Oh, spicy food might be a bit much for me. Uh, a lovely fragrance in the water..." He was still holding the glass, enchanted by the scent lingering from it.

 

"Do you like it? It's jasmine-infused water. I grow it myself behind that house over there," the elderly woman explained with a smile before excusing herself to give orders in the kitchen, suggesting he stroll in the front garden while lunch was prepared. Her clouded eyes, framed by spectacles, watched his broad back thoughtfully, then turned to look at the hanging picture on the wall with joy in her gaze.

 

"Kaew, is that him? Is that your Khun Phra Nai?" Her hoarse voice trembled. Tears welled up as she dabbed at them with the edge of her cloth. Memories from the past returned, making her smile sadly. Glancing at the white house in the distance, she suddenly thought of her little great-great-grandson.

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The tall figure took a deep breath. The Spanish cherry blossoms that had drawn him to stand beneath the tree sent their refreshing fragrance through the air. A breeze carried away some of the midday heat. His eyes surveyed the surroundings before catching on to one particular spot. There was another house some distance away. He walked in that direction. ...The still looked as beautiful as when it was first built...There was no fence, only a long hedge of golden dewdrops. He searched for an entrance, but stopped as the tea bushes suddenly stirred. The tall figure stumbled back as a shadowy figure burst forth from the shrubs.

 

"Oh!" The boy reeled backwards, striking the ground with a heavy thud after the sudden collision. A long arm shot out on instinct to catch what was before him, then went still.

 

"Ah!" cried a bright-toned voice. A small face pressed against the broad chest of the person below. The boy had shut his eyes tight, bracing for pain, but when it failed to come as sharply as he feared, he slowly opened them. As if time had stopped, the man did not loosen his hold on the small figure. He gazed at the flawless face of the person in his embrace, and a mysterious feeling stirred within him....He had met this boy before...

 

Those bright, tapered eyes met his. The fair cheeks were flushed pink, likely from running around. Lips were tinged red and pressed into a tight line, and there was a faint, pleasant scent. Phrawut was certain this was his first visit to the house, and he had definitely never met the boy in his arms. Yet why...did he feel so familiar with the boy in his arms? As if they had met long ago, and what was more, he longed for him. His steady hand reached up to gently ruffle the boy's hair with affection. He stood up, brushing away bits of grass and leaves from the little one's clothes. The winsome boy tilted his head up to regard the stranger. At the sound of a voice, the small figure started and looked left and right for an escape route.

 

"Where are you, Little Master Kaewta? Great-great-grandmother sent me to find you," called a maid. The little boy glanced around before ducking back through the golden dewdrops hedge the way he'd come. Seeing this, the man moved to follow, but was checked. "Oh, there you are, young sir. Lunch is ready. Madam sent me to fetch you," said the young woman, then turned to call again for the one she had been sent to find. He grumbled, making hide-and-seek into a daily sport. Kaew… So the boy's name was Kaewta?

 

Phrawut smiled. That small form that had landed on his chest earlier was exceedingly adorable and likely a mischievous child, too. Those soft features and bright eyes darting about in search of escape bespoke a bagful of tricks. Were boys at this playful age always such trouble for those around them? The young man shook his head, smiling at the child's antics.

 

CLINK...

The tall figure gazed down as something dropped to the ground. He stooped and retrieved a silver chain with a ring threaded upon it. The man glanced toward the white house into which the boy had slipped, then looked at the ring in his hand again. Could it belong to little Kaewta? He lifted the ring to study it. There were characters engraved inside that he could not understand.

 

Phrawut pocketed the ring as he was summoned again. The delicious meal suited his taste perfectly, not too spicy, leaving him with an unusually hearty appetite. The elderly woman beamed at his endless compliments on her cooking. The pair chatted idly with the old woman for a while before he asked to take his leave. All the while, he kept craning his neck toward the white house, so often that his conversation partner couldn't help but ask what he was looking for. Even as the afternoon waned, there was still no sign of the boy. He wanted to ask if the ring he'd found belonged to him so that he could return it to its owner. However, despite the long wait, they never met again, so he decided to call it a day and took his leave. And just like that, the ring in his pocket slipped from memory entirely.

 

"Where is it now?" A small voice carried through the air as the little boy stooped, scanning the ground. Sometimes he even dropped to his knees, raking his gaze across the floor, searching for whatever had gone missing.

 

"What are you doing, Young Master?" Porn asked, catching sight of the child's bottom bobbing up and down.

 

"Looking for a ring, Phi Porn."

"What ring? Did some young lady drop it here?"

 

"Huh! It's Kaew's ring!" The little one turned to answer loudly. Porn's eyes widened as she let out a giggle.

 

"Right, right, if it's Master Kaew's ring, then it's yours. So, where did you get it from?"

 

"From the White Manor, of course! Uh! Phi Porn, don't tell Great-Great-Grandmother that Kaew took it from there!" Realising his slip, the little boy knew he'd erred badly. Only after the words tumbled out did he grasp the magnitude of his mistake. Panicking at the thought of punishment, he clutched his nanny's arm tightly.

 

"Master Kaewta took it from the White Manor? Oh my! Master Kaew! Aren't you afraid its rightful owner might come and demand it back?" Porn put on a show of fear, rubbing her arms and glancing around nervously. The encroaching dusk only deepened her unease.

 

"But it belongs to Kaew!" The little one crossed his arms with indignation. "The White Manor is mine, so the ring inside must be mine too. That's only proper!" Seeing the little master's unyielding stance, Porn could only nod along, trying to coax the boy back to the main house.

 

"No! I have to find the ring first!" Kaewta shouted

 

"Let's look tomorrow, shall we? It's getting late, and Great-Great-Grandmother will be looking for you."

 

"Then help Kaew look, Phi Porn!"

"What?!"

 

"It must be around here somewhere, or maybe it fell inside."

 

"Oh no! Master, I'm not going in there." The little boy burst out laughing as he tugged her toward the manor. The more she resisted, the harder he pulled. He wasn't dragging Phi Porn along because he was afraid of anything in this house, but because he only loved teasing the scaredy-cat girl.

 

"If you leave me to go in alone, what will you say when Great-Great-Grandma asks?" The boy played his trump card. Porn stood frozen, finally letting the little master drag her inside. Porn whimpered in her throat while looking around fearfully. Look here, how could Master Kaewta find joy in playing here! The large hall housed a large painting. 

 

Porn didn't recognise the people in it-one dressed like an old-time government official sitting in a chair, another smaller figure with a sweet-looking face, whose gender Porn couldn't determine, standing close. As darkness fell and the dim light filtered in, it almost seemed like the people in the painting could move, causing Porn to shake all over at the thought.

 

"The ring might've fallen upstairs!"

 

"I'm coming with you!" Porn ran after the boy up to the second floor. The room was a spacious bedroom with a four-poster bed in the centre, draped with red silk. The room was spotlessly clean since the owner of the Rom Ruedee mansion had people see to it weekly. Kaewta crouched to look under the bed, sweeping his hand all around before crying out in delight.

 

"Hmm, why is it bigger?" The boy looked down at the ring in his hand and frowned. The size wasn't the same as before. When he saw the same letters inscribed inside the band, the little one grew at ease from the certainty that it was the same ring.

 

"Big or small, never mind! Now that we've found it, let's go back!" Kaewta nodded, allowing his nanny to pull him away. Yet his brows remained furrowed as he kept his gaze on the ring. ...Or were there two rings? Whether it was one ring or two slipped from the boy's mind the moment he saw his Great-Great-Grandmother waiting at the front steps, cane in hand. Shrinking into himself, Kaewta quickly shoved the ring into his trouser pocket, trying to hide it, then turned to her with a sheepish grin.

 

"Great-Great-Grandma.."

 

"Don't try to sweet-talk me, you little rascal! Didn't I tell you not to come to the White Manor alone after dark like this?" And so the little one received five swift strikes of the cane on his bottom, leaving him to cry himself to sleep while muttering that his Great-Great-Grandma didn't love him.

 

Wrinkled fingers gently wiped the tear stains from his innocent face. Even in sleep, her little one still sobbed, causing her heart to clench with sympathy. She had taken in the young boy after his mother passed away in an accident when he was still small, and for the father, Sone had buried himself in business and barely spared time for his own son.

 

"My dear Kaew," Ruedee stooped to press a fond kiss to that soft cheek. "Wait until the time is right, sweet child." Her clouded eyes strayed into the distance as she recalled the young man she'd encountered earlier today, a smile touching her lips.

 

"This time, you'll finally be together at last." The engine's rumble echoed across the river. Water droplets flecked the young man's hands as he leaned over the side, then drew further inside the boat. It had been so long since he'd had time to sit and take in such beauty.

 

After more than six months of relentless work and countless trips between Thailand and China, once Friday evening's work wrapped up, Khun Sone had practically thrown him into a car and sent him off to Amphawa to rest alone. The boatman cut the engine as they approached the cork trees where fireflies clustered in the dark. Tiny pinpricks of light flickered to life, drawing awed exclamations from the passengers, himself included. 

 

In this late-rain, early-winter season, fireflies were so abundant that they attracted throngs of tourists. Khun Sone had booked a room for him. The moment his head hit the pillow, exhaustion claimed him. Come morning, he rose to offer alms to monks by the riverside, with offerings the guesthouse owner had set out.

 

It wasn't until Sunday afternoon that he made the drive back to Bangkok. The young man discovered he was quite fond of the firefly boat tours and thought he'd return if time allowed. Speaking of boats reminded him that the Rom Ruedee residence was reachable by water along the side. It was time to visit Grandmother.

 

Phrawut took a ferry across the river at what he hoped was the right pier for Rom Ruedee's house. The boat was packed, full of people making use of the service, so he took the vacant seat at the back. Though the riverside atmosphere here retained some urban character, it was still pleasant enough for idle contemplation. Then his gaze caught sight of a house by the river... His heart gave a sudden lurch...

 

A white house with a small pavilion stretching out toward the water. The dwelling looked lonely, shrouded by towering trees, steeped in solitude that starkly contrasted its surroundings. The serenity was almost as if otherworldly. At the pavilion, someone stood staring out toward this very boat.

 

"Sir, could you dock at that pavilion?"

 

"Oh no, sir! Can't do that with all these passengers. We can only dock at the pier." The young man sighed, glancing back at the house with regret as the boat curved away. Soon enough, he arrived at the Rom Ruedee house.

 

"Well, now. How are you? It's been a while, hasn't it? Where have you been?" Ruedee greeted him, accepting his respectful wai.

 

"Holiday or work?"

 

"Work. But are you here alone, Grandma?" The young man asked, surveying the quiet house. He'd recently learned from Khun Sone that the little boy he'd met earlier was his only son.

 

"Oh, that little rascal's probably playing at the White Manor over there."

"The White Manor?"

 

"Did you see it on your way here? That white house just past mine?" Ruedee smiled, her weathered eyes studying him with an unreadable expression.

 

"Yes, I saw a white house before reaching here. A lovely place indeed."

"Would you like to have a look?"

 

"May I?"

"Why not? Come along. While we wait for dinner, I'll take you to see the White Manor."

 

Ruedee led the young man to the golden dewdrop hedge, the exact spot where he had once met the little boy named Kaewta. A faint smile tugged at his lips at the thought that he might finally see the boy again. Strangely, ever since that day, he couldn't shake the boy's face from his mind. No matter how busy or exhausted he had been, instead of sleeping deeply, he dreamed. In those dreams, that boy always appeared; and if not the boy himself, then his likeness. 

 

If Khun Sone knew he'd been dreaming of the man's son, who knows if his kindness would continue? Though it wasn't in any improper way, of course, but still, it was peculiar to dream of someone nearly every night after meeting them just once.

 

"Kaew, Kaewta," the great-great-grandmother called. Her pace had slowed with age, so Phrawut offered his arm to support her as they made their way.

 

"Grandma could have sent someone else to guide me. You don't have to walk here yourself."

 

"No, I had to guide you myself." Ruedee clasped the young man's hand, those eyes gazing up with some unspoken hope he couldn't comprehend. "Where has Kaew run off to now?"

 

"Probably at the riverside pavilion?" Phrawut recalled seeing a silhouette there when he'd arrived by boat.

 

"That pixie! I've told him not to play near the pier! By the way, where are you staying now, Yai? Renting a place?"

 

"Yes, Grandma. A room near my office. But I'm house-hunting now. Next month, I'll likely be based in Thailand permanently. Besides, the family estate from my adoptive father is in the suburbs, which is too far from the city to work."

 

"Hmm, is that so?" Ruedee murmured, pondering something. "Do you like this house?" She turned to ask as they reached the White Manor's entrance. Phrawut stood transfixed, gazing up at the dwelling before him in awe. The pristine white house stood surrounded by trees of varying sizes. Some bloomed, perfuming the air, while others had just shed their leaves. The gathering darkness cloaking this house didn't frighten him. Instead, he felt an inexplicable pull to this beautiful dwelling.

 

"Ah!" Some image flashed through his mind, making him clutch his head in alarm.

"What's wrong?" The elder asked with concern. The young man shook his head, dispelling the dizzy spell before looking up with a smile. That feeling had flickered and died. Some image had rushed through his mind, swift and then gone.

 

"It must be seasickness from the boat."

"Hmm?"

 

"Whose house is this, Grandmother?" Phrawut steered back to the matter at hand, not wanting to worry the elderly woman as he resumed his gaze at the house.

 

"It belongs to..." Ruedee's words faltered, unsure how to explain.

 

"It belongs to Kaewta!" A voice bright as birdsong rang out. The little boy leapt into view from who-knew-where, nearly sending his great-great-grandmother swooning. Fortunately, Phrawut was already supporting her, preventing an actual fall.

 

"Kaewta! Why must you frighten Great-Great-Grandmother like this?" the young man chided. He didn't realise he was showing such easy familiarity with the boy. It came naturally, as though he and Kaewta had always spoken thus.

 

"Great-Great-Grandmother, Kaew is sorry." The little one stuck out his tongue at the tall figure, then ran to embrace his great-great-grandmother, his voice trembling. The elderly woman's frightened expression made Kaewta's heart sink. Her face had gone pale and wan.

 

"It's all right, it's all right. Come, let's go back to the main house," Ruedee cut in, striding forward with Phrawut's support to the main house. Upon seeing it, Kaewta rushed to take her other hand possessively, fearing his great-great-grandmother might love him less after the recent incident.

 

"Actually, you could move into the White Manor if you'd like, Yai."

 

"Sorry?" The young man set down his water glass and turned to listen to the old lady again.

 

"P'd like to give the White Manor to you."

"But... why?"

 

"No! The White Manor is Kaew's! Kaew won't give it!" The little boy's lips pressed tight in a thin line, glaring disapprovingly at the invader whom his great-great-grandmother intended to give the White Manor to.

 

"Oh, Kaew..." Ruedee called the little one's name helplessly. Phrawut looked at the boy before him and smiled. The child's defiant stance held no threat whatsoever.

Rather, it was endearing. He also knew the White Manor was under Grandmother Ruedee's care and did not belong to Kaewta as the boy claimed. Ruedee sighed at her great-great-grandson's antics. She whispered to Phrawut before leaving that she had indeed meant what she said about giving him the manor, though it would take time for Kaewta to accept it. 

 

Since toddling, her little one had hovered around the White Manor nearly every day until he came to believe it belonged to him alone. Phrawut promised to visit the White Manor daily so Kaewta could grow accustomed to him and gradually ease his possessiveness. After all, he himself was quite taken with the house. Even if Grandmother Ruedee didn't bestow it on him, he would have found a way to purchase it.

 

"Kaewta, if you don't come out, I'll take Great-Great-Grandma out alone," the deep voice coaxed while hiding a smile with utmost effort. He had just glimpsed someone's swift movement hiding behind the Spanish cherry tree in front of the White Manor.

 

".." When no response came, the young man turned and headed back toward the elder, who was waiting nearby. Someone immediately ran ahead to help support his own great-great-grandmother. The young man smiled with satisfaction, but quickly suppressed it as the boy turned to look at him with protective green eyes.

 

Every single day for over half a year now, Phrawut hadn't given up trying to grow familiar with Kaewta. Likewise, his Thai had improved enough that he could now spar with the boy every day, unbeknownst to Kaewta, who had become his accidental language teacher. Any phrases he didn't understand, he would secretly ask Great-Great-Grandmother Ruedee later.

 

Today, Phrawut had come to take the old lady to the doctor. Her fever had refused to break since last night, worrying Khun Sone greatly. But stuck with an important client meeting, he'd asked Phrawut to go in his place. The young man had become so familiar with the Rom Ruedee household that he was practically family. 

 

Whenever the maid Porn couldn't handle young Master Kaewta, she would immediately run to complain to Khun Phrawut, who always seemed to find ways to manage the mischievous little one successfully. 

 

The wee boy sat sulking, displeased at being forced to wait outside the examination room. He felt irritated at the other person who acted like his great-great-grandmother's grandchild. Whenever Kaewta tried to tease him, Great-great-grandmother always took the man's side. The boy couldn't help but feel that her love for him had begun to wane.

 

Like the previous time when Phrawut stayed overnight at the main house, Great-great-grandmother had him sleep in the room next to Kaewta's, even though she knew he despised the man, yet still let him come over every single day. So that night, he decided to play a trick. Kaewta had played slow, drawn-out traditional Thai music and burned nearly an entire packet of large incense sticks, lit a giant bundle of incense sticks, and fanned the smoke toward Phrawut's room, trying to make it seem haunted. 

Just as he was giggling at his own trick, the smoke betrayed him, wafting back into his face instead, having lit too many of them, leaving Kaewta himself coughing, red-faced, so his prank crumbled midway. "Kaewta, I'll take you home now," Kaewta snapped from his reverie, looking up at the other walking out alone.

 

"What about Great-Great-Grandma?"

"She has to stay overnight at the hospital. I'll take you home first."

 

"No! I want to stay with her!"

"Kaewta, you have school tomorrow. Let's go home and rest."

 

"..." The boy pursed his lips, clearly upset. He wasn't trying to skip school or anything, but he was genuinely worried about his great-great-grandmother. Finally, Phrawut had to give in and allow the child to stay. He then swung by the hospital to pick Kaewta up and get him ready for school himself.

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The atmosphere was heavy with sorrow. A boy, newly past his thirteenth year, sat curled up beside his great-great-grandmother's bed, knees drawn to his chest, weeping quietly and refusing to move. No matter how gently Phi Porn coaxed, he remained in the same position, sobbing still.

 

"Kaewta, if you keep crying like this, Great-Great-Grandmother will worry."

"She won't be able to go to heaven."

 

"No! Why can't Great-Great-Grandmother go to heaven?" The owner of that innocent face looked up at the person sitting across from him. Tears still stained both his smooth cheeks, those bright, clear eyes now so dim it made one's heart ache. Phrawut raised his hand to wipe away the tears gently:

 

"Because she'll be too worried about you to leave."

 

"Then I won't cry anymore. That way, Great-Great-Grandmother can go to heaven, right?"

 

"That's right, Good Boy. Now let's go downstairs together." The young man stood up, extending his hand for the boy to take before they went down together. After that day when the young man took Grandmother Ruedee to the hospital, she never returned home...

 

Khun Sone moved back into the main house soon after, not wanting his son to be left alone, and quietly assumed the responsibilities once held by the late matriarch. Phrawut placed his box of belongings down with a sigh, guilt creeping in at the memory of that boy. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't shake a deep, persistent acquisitiveness. He wanted to live in that white house. He missed it and felt familiar with it. An unknown sense told him that the home should be his. Moreover, Grandma Ruedee had entrusted the white house to his care and had named him the owner in her will.

 

*Let Phrawut and Kaewta be joint owners of the White Manor.'

 

He didn't know what was on Grandmother Ruedee's mind that had her write it that way. He had once asked to buy the place outright, but she had refused. Meanwhile, Khun Sone strictly followed the grandmother's instructions, refusing to sell the house to him and even urging him to move his belongings there. The only problem was that possessive one...

 

When Kaewta learned that Great-Great-Grandmother had given him the White Manor to look after, he suddenly threw a tantrum. Hence, the thought that they could finally have a civil conversation fell apart. So in the end, Khun Sone had him move into the main house first. Once Kaewta softened, he could move to the White Manor later.

 

Phrawut recalled their first encounter, from that moment to the present, and sighed. These past years, time hadn't seemed to help in making the boy accept him, even though he was fond of Kaewta like a real younger brother. As he was picking up clothes to arrange in the wardrobe, something fell to the floor with a clear, resonant sound.

 

CLINK...

The young man frowned. He bent down to pick up the gold ring and examine it. This was the ring from when he'd first met Kaewta; he turned it to read the inscription he hadn't been able to decipher before. For eternity…

 

The young man frowned at those words. The text was engraved on the ring, fixed and indelible. Somehow, it inexplicably rang a bell. Back then, Kaewta had been so tiny despite being ten years old. He was playful and cheeky, with bright red lips and rosy cheeks. Those bright, crystal eyes that gazed at him when he fell into his arms were so endearing. Even now, it wasn't much different. The boy had grown taller, his figure beginning to stretch awkwardly. 

 

Those bright eyes grew longer, yet still held the same spark of stubbornness. He smiled at the mere thought. He hadn't visited Rom Ruedee House for quite a while after that, which made him forget about this ring entirely, and he couldn't even remember where he'd put it. Strange as it seemed... why hadn't he come across it when he packed up his old room?

 

Phrawut shook his head, pocketed the ring, thinking he'd ask Kaewta later if it belonged to the boy. The White Manor looked just as magnificent as ever. Phrawut stood before it, admiring the fine timber it was built from. The Spanish cherry tree in front spoke to the home's age by its enormous size, though its blossoms had already fallen. 

 

In front was a white pavilion with climbing vines bearing pale yellow flowers and a white fence closed tight, looking as if it had never been opened, since the usual entrance was the golden dewdrops hedge that bordered the main house. The side facing the river had a pavilion, visible from the boat ride he'd once taken. But the side yard was empty. His slender brows furrowed. There should have been something there. A small house? No... that wasn't it. A dance rehearsal pavilion. Oh! But how did he know that?

 

Phrawut shook his head to dispel the thought, stepping toward the front door, heart pounding as if he were a man about to reunite with a long-lost love. The idea made him chuckle. His excitement was simply because Kaewta was so possessive of this place, and he'd never set foot in this house before. To his surprise, the atmosphere inside wasn't as dark or eerie as he'd feared. 

 

The rooms were open and airy, sparsely furnished, with wide floorboards and high ceilings that allowed the air to flow freely. The windows were open to catch the breeze as if someone were always there. Khun Sone must have had people clean regularly, as per Great-Great-Grandmother Ruedee's wishes. The teak furniture, though old, maintained its beauty. There was a writing desk, an olive-green sofa for receiving guests, and a cabinet displaying delicate Benjarong porcelain. One room door was left wide open. He guessed it must be a study since he could see rows of bookshelves. 

 

The young man walked to that room as if hypnotised. His eyes fell upon a large photograph behind the desk. A man in a white, royal-patterned official uniform and an olive-green sash sat smiling faintly in a chair. His striking, handsome face bore only a slight smile, yet those eyes were filled with boundless delight. Beside him stood a younger man, beautiful and delicate, his features soft like a woman's. He wore a similarly colored outfit, his shy smile lighting up his face. The seated one rested his arm on the armrest, raising his hand to intertwine fingertips with the one beside him… Was that him and Kaewta?

 

Phrawut stood petrified. His heart hammered as if it would burst from his chest. A strange tightness seized his chest. His breath came in ragged gasps. Images he had long forgotten rushed through his mind, swift and violent as a flood, yet crystal clear, making the young man squeeze his eyes shut. It felt as if his head were being struck until it ached, with cold sweat soaking his broad back. He felt a chill within that he couldn't control.

 

"Uh!" His legs gave out, sending him to his knees, clutching his head from a deluge of visions that flooded through without stopping, while both eyes fixed upon the picture. Suddenly, the weight in his chest seemed to be lifted, replaced by serenity and peace blooming within, as if something had been released before awareness ebbed into the night.

 

"You're awake!" The girl, Porn, rushed over to check on him.

"I remember being at the White Manor."

 

"You fainted, sir. Phi Kla went to call you for lunch and found you collapsed inside, so he carried you out," the young girl replied, making a frightened gesture before stepping closer and whispering, "Does a ghost haunt you?"

 

"Huh! Of course not." The young man laughed at the question, knowing how frightened she was of such things. "I've probably just been working too hard lately. Thank you. You and Phi Kla can go back to work. I'm feeling better now." He spoke with a broad smile, throwing off the blanket and rising to walk to the window. From this angle, he couldn't see the White Manor's roof clearly, yet Phrawut felt no frustration whatsoever.

 

A beautiful smile painted across his handsome face. The young man crossed his arms and leaned against the window frame, thinking about what had caused him to lose consciousness earlier that day. In truth, he'd seen those visions many times before in dreams. 

 

Ever since he was a child, he'd often dreamed of a place he'd never known, of someone dressed in old-fashioned clothes, speaking a language he only half-understood. And each time, the dreams would fade upon waking, swept away by the rush of daily tasks and responsibilities.

 

Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out the ring and looked at it, his smile growing even wider.  If only he hadn't forgotten back then, if only he'd gone to ask Kaewta whether this ring belonged to the boy, or asked Great-Great-Grandmother Ruedee what it meant, he might have known then that what he'd been waiting for was this close. ...For eternity...

 

Such a literal meaning. By the way, where might the other ring be? Could it be with Kaewta? Pondering, he turned the ring small in his hand, then walked over to open a drawer and find an unused necklace to thread the ring onto. Phrawut wore it around his neck before heading downstairs to tell Porn and Kla to help move his belongings to the White Manor, causing Porn's eyes to fly wide upon hearing this.

 

"Tskl" Just imagining Kaewta's reaction after returning from school amused him. Let's see what the little rascal will do when he finds out I've claimed the White Manor for myself.

 

Phrawut returned to the large photograph to take it in once more. He remembered the day... that Kaewta had refused to take a picture together with him. Those pale cheeks had reddened-whether from anger or embarrassment, he couldn't quite tell. But in the end, the boy succumbed to his coaxing and agreed to be photographed together. 

 

The tall figure moved up to the master bedroom. The wide four-poster bed stood clean and ready, draped in silk. The balcony doors were thrown open, letting the white lace curtains flutter gently in the breeze. Outside, the Spanish cherry tree quivered as the wind rustled through its leaves. The tall figure rested his arms on the balcony rail, eyes closed, savouring the cool air that carried the fragrance of the countless flowers Kaewta had selectively planted.

 

At last... we've found our way back to each other. And it turned out exactly as he'd thought. After dinner, Phrawut told Khun Sone he'd moved into the White Manor; the instant the possessive one heard it, he erupted on the spot. The young man smiled, watching the small figure hop in vexation with fond amusement. He leaned back against the chair, loose and relaxed, eyes fixed on the little figure and all his theatrics, in a good mood and not looking away.

 

Kaewta, right now, was still very small, and he wasn't so perverse as to feel anything obscene toward a boy. Yet he was happy, as if he could glimpse the part of Kaewta's life he'd never had the chance to know. What had Kaewta been like as a child? Whom had he met along the way as he grew, what had he gone through? He couldn't know, for they had met and loved only when both were already grown. He had once thought little Kaewta must be irresistibly dear; thinking on it now, he saw he'd been right-just look at him, this impish Kaewta playing the little tough.

 

"Who let you go live in my White Manor!" One small arm planted at his waist, the other stabbing a finger at him, fearless.

 

"Kaewta! Put your arm down. Who taught you to point at your elder, hm!" He scolded, voice rough enough to startle the boy, who yanked his arm back at once. 

 

"And how can you address someone older as 'you' like that? It's rude."

 

"B-but- you- how did you move into the White Manor? That belongs to Kaew. The White Manor is Kaew's!" The boy kept protesting even after the scolding. Khun Sone, sitting beside them, shook his head at his son's behaviour and let Phrawut do the instructing without stepping in.

 

"Who says? The White Manor is ours, actually." Phrawut explained with a smile. Kaewta furrowed his brows and tilted his head at the big man, uncomprehending. 

 

"Grandmother Ruedee told me-she said I'm to look after the White Manor together with you."

 

"But..." Kaewta faltered. Possessive as he was, since the great-great-grandmother really had entrusted the White Manor to the other party to look after, just as he claimed, the boy found himself with nothing to shoot back.

 

"Right now, I've got nowhere to stay. Or would you like me to sleep on the street?" Phrawut asked. The boy froze. He pressed his lips together, turning that over.

 

"I didn't want you to sleep on the street," the small mouth mumbled softly. The man across from him heard and smiled.

 

"Then let's do it this way; think of it as my asking to stay, paying my way by scrubbing and dusting the White Manor and watering the trees in the garden. When you're grown, I'll hand the White Manor over to you alone."

 

"Really!" The boy beamed, eyes lighting up at once.

"Really. I mean what I say," Phrawut smiled broadly.

 

"Yai..." Khun Sone, listening at the side, wanted to object. The young man turned, smiled, and gave a small shake of his head-don't bring this up in front of Kaewta just now.

 

"Hmm-hmm, hmm-hmm." Now in fine spirits, Kaewta hummed in his throat, legs swinging to and fro, and spooned massaman curry onto Phrawut's rice-something he had never done before. The young man couldn't help but laugh out loud.

════[changbins_delulu_wife]════

For the past six years, Phrawut had flown abroad as often as one might drive to a corner shop. He'd spent months at a time in foreign cities, sleeping in distant lands even more often than in the White Manor.

 

The White Manor had been well-maintained by Rom Ruedee House as always; without it, the manor would have fallen into disrepair, for its owner was rarely in residence. Phrawut had been occupied with expanding the company he co-owned with Khun Sone. Now that everything had at last fallen into place, he felt a profound sense of relief. This time, he thought, he could finally settle at the White Manor in peace. He wondered how little Kaewta had fared in all those years. He'd barely seen the boy after having moved into the White Manor just three short months before work consumed him.

 

By now, the boy must have grown into a young man. Six years had passed, and Kaewta would be nineteen this year. The man set down his luggage and walked to the bedroom window, still thrown wide open. His gaze swept across the garden as he breathed in the mingled scent of blooming flowers.

 

A rustle in the branches made Phrawut reopen his eyes. Peering out to find the source, his eyebrows rose in surprise. A slender figure carrying an armful of books made his way past the golden dewdrop hedges into the grounds of the White Manor.

 

"Kaewtal", the man called out. The other stopped and looked up. The scene almost took Phrawut's breath away. A dark, short haircut, as required by school regulations, revealed a perfectly sculpted face. Graceful brows complemented those beautiful eyes, a refined nose, and deep-colored lips. Every feature combined to give the young man an ethereal handsomeness. The soft blue shirt made his smooth skin appear even more luminous. Phrawut stood frozen, staring at the figure below for a long moment.

 

"You're back." Phrawut was snapped from his trance. He nodded, then turned on his heel and rushed down the stairs. When he reached Kaewta's side, he paused again, studying him up close. Even at nineteen, the boy barely reached his shoulder. "Kaewta." The boy nodded in acknowledgement and began walking toward the riverside pavilion. Phrawut followed, his heart pounding so hard that it echoed in his ears. His cheeks flushed, the heat climbing to both ears. Heat spread from his cheeks to both ears, and his palms grew damp with a bashful sweat. Kaewta truly had grown.

 

From that day forward, Phrawut found himself crossing paths with Kaewta more frequently. During idle moments, he would help the young man with homework, just as he had when Kaewta was still a child. Though the boy's hostility had lessened considerably, remnants still surfaced. During meals at the main house, Kaewta would ask in front of Khun Sone when he would finally be given the White Manor's sole ownership of the boy. Phrawut could only smile and reply: "Soon."

 

"What's wrong with your Khun Kaew today, Porn?" Phrawut raised a cool drink to his lips as he settled into the seat across from the boy, adopting a sour expression before asking the maid beside him.

 

"He wanted to go to the temple fair across the river, sir, but Khun Sone wouldn't allow it. Khun Sone said he was too busy," Porn reported to Phrawut. The young man nodded, then made up his mind.

 

"Can I take you, then?"

 

"Really?" Kaewta whipped around to look. The former adorably sulky expression instantly transformed into a bright, delighted smile.

 

"Really. But let me call Khun Sone for permission first." Without hesitation, Phrawut phoned Khun Sone. The other end granted permission for the young man to take his son to the temple fair, so long as he brought the boy home before nightfall.

 

Phrawut cast a glance sideways at his companion with a contented smile. The sounds of traditional circle dances, folk opera verses, and Thai country singers all blended into a chaotic symphony. Kaewta's gaze, roaming around the various stalls, was endearing. This rare occasion of the boy being so agreeable to him made Phrawut deeply heartened, though he knew full well it stemmed from the boy's desire to attend the fair.

 

"Would you like anything?" He asked. The smaller figure nodded so vigorously it seemed his head might detach from his shoulders.

 

"Candied jujubes!"

 

"Hmm." The tall frame paused, momentarily stiff upon hearing this. Dark brows furrowed as sharp eyes studied the smooth face of the young man thoughtfully.

 

"Can't I have some?" The dejected expression that looked up at him made the young man's heart skip.

 

"Of course you can. I'll buy some for you." Phrawut collected himself with a gentle smile and indulged the other. Kaewta had begged Khun Sone to bring him here after hearing Porn, the housemaid's, enthusiastic descriptions, but had been refused as Khun Sone needed to leave for Singapore at dawn. Unable to bear the boy's dejected face, Phrawut had stepped in. Porn and two other young maids followed behind, arms full of snacks, clearly enjoying themselves.

 

The tall man took Kaewta's small wrist in his hand and led him toward the vendor's stall, where the perfect bite-sized candied jujubes in lovely colours were lined up for selection. He bent to look at the small face once more with a smile, then proceeded to purchase dozens of sticks upon seeing those sparkling eyes.

 

"Will you eat all of that?"

 

"Well, I'll share with Father, Phi Kan, Aunt in, and many others," the youth answered brightly.

 

"All right, all right. You really do love them, just like before."

"Sorry?"

 

"Nothing." The boy tightened his eyebrows yet loosened them in less than a minute.

 

"A Ferris wheel!" Having satisfied his craving for candied palm for merely a little while, the naughty boy's eyes sparkled anew upon spotting the attraction. The tall figure followed his gaze before letting a throaty chuckle.

 

"Want to ride?" This time, without waiting for Kaewta's assent nod, the young man grasped the smaller hand once more, commandeered the package of sweets to carry himself, and headed straight for the Ferris wheel. After purchasing tickets, he stood in line at the front of the ride.

 

"It's so high. Will it fall?" The youth tilted his head up to ask, drawing an affectionate smile for the umpteenth time.

 

"It won't fall. Are you scared? If that's the case, we don't have to ride."

"..A little, but since Khun Yai is here, I think I will be fine."

 

"Oh?" That simple sentence struck him square in the left chest, as if a whip cracked across his heart. His heart pounded at the boy's words and thrummed wildly with delight beyond measure at the word. Did Kaewta realise how potent those words were, causing Phrawut's heart to race? Both the utterly disarming sentence and the way he addressed him, Khun Yai, as he had once been called, made Phrawut want to sweep the adorable creature into his arms and kiss those cheeks for saying something so endearing. 

 

Though the boy called him "Khun Yai," he still refused to call him Phi, despite the urging of Khun Sone and even Porn, the maid. He might have used the term once or twice in the past, but soon reverted to Khun Phrawut just the same. Those eyes glimmered and danced, fixed on the view that dwindled as the Ferris wheel ascended. He turned left and right, taking it in, before the cabin swayed and startled him. Pale hands gripped the rail while his eyes squeezed tightly shut.

 

"Are you scared, Kaewta?"

 

"It j-just shook!" Phrawut smiled and slowly shifted to sit on the same side as the boy. "Ail!" Kaewta cried out as the cabin tilted from the weight on one side. The young man quickly pulled him into an embrace.

 

"Shh, it won't fall." A large hand stroked the soft hair soothingly.

"It's shaking! It's shaking!" Kaewta continued to protest against the firm chest.

 

"It's just wobbling a little."

 

"No! Go back to your side so it won't shake, Khun Yai!" the boy demanded while gripping the back of Phrawut's shirt tightly.

 

"Aren't you scared the Ferris wheel will fall?"

 

"Huh?" The small face pulled away from the broad chest to look up at the speaker in confusion.

 

"If I go back to my original seat and Kaewta sits here alone..."

 

Kaewta swept his gaze around the cabin, then buried his face against the young man's chest once more without further protest. Phrawut let a smile curve as his strong arm slowly wrapped around the small form, cradling him in his embrace.

Selfish as it may seem, despite knowing that Kaewta was afraid, he let the Ferris wheel go round after round without asking to stop. At times, when the cabin jolted, his prominent nose would graze the soft tresses, and he would trace them lightly with yearning and protective care.

 

Amidst the darkness, the owner of those crystal eyes refused to fall into slumber regardless of the clock indicating the arrival of the new day. He glanced at the jar of candied jujubes sitting on his bedside table. The sweetness still lingered on the tip of his tongue, and at the thought of his patron, he let out a chuckle. A full stomach without spending a dime...

 

Taken aback, the man stared at something on the dining table. He set the coffee mug down on the table and frowned at that object. Candied jujubes?

 

"Porn, did you bring the candied jujubes to me?" he asked Porn, who was setting out a snack to go with the coffee.

 

"Candied jujubes? Oh, no. It wasn't me; it was Master Kaew. This morning, before he was off to the university, I saw him carry a jar of candied jujubes from his room, and then he disappeared into the kitchen for quite a while."

 

"Is that so?"

'Kaewta, this one is scrumptious,'

 

‘I know it's good. I eat it often, sir.'

'Is that so? Can you share it with me then?'

 

'If you wanted some, why did you only buy one stick?'

 

..It's fine if you don't want to share.'

'Here, have some!'

"Mmm, sweet,'

 

Slowly, his large hand picked up candied jujubes. Once the lush touched the tip of his tongue, some visions flashed into his mind and tugged a smile onto the corner of his lips. He lifted a coffee mug to sip before pulling a candied jujube plate toward himself a little nearer. Coffee and candied jujubes were quite a decent pair.

════[changbins_delulu_wife]════

Kaewta, currently a sophomore, will be entering his third year in a few months.

The hardship of the final exam period was approaching. The boy with textbooks in his hands let out a disheartened groan once he thought of his precarious score.

 

The pouring rain was upsetting enough. As he closed the textbook to give his eyes a rest, his brows knit at the sight of a tall figure holding an umbrella over a pretty woman. Kaewta had never set foot in her father's company, so she wasn't familiar with him. The boy tilted his head, considering, then hauling his books downstairs himself.

 

"When will you be visiting China again, Khun Phrawut?"

"Next month."

 

"Can Fah accompany you there?"

 

"Sure. As you please, Khun Fah." Those words stunned the eavesdropper. Why did it hurt within his left chest...

 

"Where did he go?" The baritone words were not very quiet. His eyes scanned the area, looking for someone who was looking back at him with a mischievous grin.

 

MEOW!

"Ah!" The fluffy creature was oblivious that it had startled its living cushion with the sudden cry. The seeker gazed up at the tropical almond tree and smiled. It wasn't that Phrawut didn't know where the boy was hiding; he merely feigned difficulty, for the boy's amusement. At the same time, the cat in the other person's arms meowed so that the man could look up on purpose. Just like the old days, the young man smiled, recalling the past as well as last month, when Kaewta lulled him into jumping into the lotus pond.

 

"Please come down, Kaewta. Khun Sone needs you to get ready for this evening's party."

 

"No! Uh! Little kitty!" Kaewta rejected and lurched upright because the fluffball in his arms was going to leap down to the person below, compelling him to reach out for restraint instinctively. Kaewta forgot entirely that he was still perched in a tree, and so, he fell. "Oh!"

 

"Kaewta!" Alarmed, the tall figure lunged forward and caught the falling body just in time. His heart nearly stopped when he saw the other plummet from the tree. Wrapping the petite body in his arms, he took the brunt of the fall himself, so hard that it knocked the wind out of him before opening his eyes to look at the person in his arms with deep concern.

 

"Ow, ow. It hurts! So h...hurt." Kaewta yelled before he even felt pain, panicking and assuming he was seriously hurt. But once he came to his senses, he realised the ground he'd landed on wasn't hard at all.

 

"I'm the one hurting, Little One." The sonorous voice over his head caused Kaewta to glance up all at once.

 

"Uh!" Like in times past, time seemed to freeze when their noses were mere inches apart, close enough to feel each other's breath. His smooth cheeks flushed with an alluring tint as his slender eyes shimmered when gazing into the eyes of the one below. Those fine eyes appeared sorrowful, yet tinged with another feeling...

 

Was it longing? Whose frantic heartbeat was it? The wee form was motionless as strong arms slid around his slender waist, while the other hand moved to caress his cheek with gentle tenderness.

 

"..Just like that time," came a deep whisper before the sharp-featured face moved closer until his prominent nose barely grazed the pale cheek. The smaller body startled and pulled back, delicate brows furrowing at those words while staring at the man below, who continued to offer him a broad smile. His gaze, clear and unguarded, met those steady eyes.

 

"Let go of me!" The mellow voice snapped sharply, jolting Phrawut from his reverie. Yet he still wouldn't release that slender waist to grant the trimmed-waisted boy the freedom he desired, trying to recall what the other had reacted that time when he'd refused to let loose... The answer dawned on him so swiftly as those eyes squinted with intent before the boy bent down to bite his shoulder firmly.

 

"Ow!" The moment the young man eased his grip, the smaller figure broke free. Kaewta sprang to his feet, hands on his hips, glaring down at him with a haughty stance. His flushed cheeks, whether from anger or embarrassment, were impossible to tell.

 

"Serves you right!" With those words, the boy bolted off into the main house, leaving Phrawut to watch until he vanished from sight, then let his head fall back onto the ground with a satisfied, guttural chuckle.

════[changbins_delulu_wife]════

The company hosted the banquet to express gratitude to supporters, shareholders, and the entire staff. As such, the hall was filled with families, the husbands, wives, and children of the invited, all gathered in celebration. Phrawut had no wish at all for Khun Sone to bring his son, every bit as inexperienced in such a society as Kaewta.

 

The young man lifted his glass of spirits to his lips, taking a contemplative sip as his gaze settled on the slender figure before him. Today, the boy wore a perfectly fitted black suit, its fine tailoring accentuating his fair complexion, drawing the eye. He found himself staring longer than intended, struck by the unexpected sight. It wasn't that the suit didn't become him, quite the contrary. What unsettled him was how exceedingly it flattered him, catching him off guard.

 

Kaewta was nothing short of exquisite in this stage of blooming youth, his body now shedding the boyhood skin to take on the form of a handsome young man. Phrawut kept reminding himself that the other was still young, despite having reached twenty. Kaewta at twenty was alight with life, energy, and undeniable charm that attracted admirers of both women and men. His sharp eyes flickered when he caught sight of a tall figure, someone's son, approaching the slender form to strike up a conversation. 

 

The flicker soon turned into a hardened gleam as a pretty girl joined them, chatting and teasing, her hand reaching out to touch Kaewta's narrow shoulder with casual familiarity. Strong hands clenched at his sides as he struggled to quell the anger rising in his chest. Just as the man was approaching the boy, he halted mid-stride since Khun Sone had already made his way to his son first. Phrawut lowered his gaze as Khun Sone glanced his way with the eye that divulged nothing.

 

The young man believed Khun Sone knew… knew how he felt about Kaewta. Ever since he no longer travelled abroad so frequently, ever since that day he encountered the nineteen-year-old Kaewta, his heart had known no peace.

 

The love he once held, the longing he once carried for Kaewta had not wavered for this Kaewta either. With longing brimming over, he laid bare his love and care for Kaewta, making no effort to conceal it. Khun Sone had never broached the subject, merely observing him in silence. Yet Phrawut understood that the older man offered no approval. Be that as it may, Kaewta had matured enough to forge his own path. Khun Sone's protectiveness stemmed from the fact that Kaewta was his only beloved son.

 

The man set his empty glass back on the tray and was about to reach for another, but his hand paused mid-air when a slender hand reached for the same glass. He cast a glance, withdrew his hand, allowing the lady to claim it-Piangfah, one of the women his father wished him to bind himself to.

 

"Thank you," her honeyed voice chimed, her delicate, melodious laugh.

"My pleasure."

 

"You look particularly dashing tonight," she complimented him with earnest admiration.

 

"Thank you. You look stunning as well, Khun Fah," Phrawut returned the courtesy. The lady laughed at his words.

 

"Yet not stunning enough to capture your attention, it seems," Piangfah remarked, having watched him all evening as his gaze remained fixed on a certain boy, never once straying to anyone else.

 

"Well then, as compensation for disappointing me, you must dance with me for at least two or three songs."

 

"It would be my honour." The lively rhythm of the music brought a bright smile to her face, and it grew brighter still under the envious glances she drew from the other ladies for dancing with the most sought-after bachelor in the entire company.

 

Meanwhile, the slight figure lost count of yet another invitation to dance he had declined for being clueless about how to dance, forcing the hopeful suitor to retreat. Pale hand gripped the glass tightly as he watched the scene before him, his chest burning as if flames licked at his insides. Suffocating anger, resentment, and displeasure churned together. All because of the man now dancing with that beautiful woman in the centre of the floor. The boy turned away from the unwelcome sight. His delicate brows knitted tightly before he decided to leave

the gathering. The late evening air, despite the zephyr, remained oppressively hot. Kaewta shed his suit jacket in frustration; his small, red lips parted in a huff.

 

"Why did you leave? Wasn't the party enjoyable?" The slight figure was startled by a deep voice. He glanced at the speaker before turning away, as if unwilling to acknowledge the man approaching. "Or are you tired?" The young man continued to probe Kaewta, his tone concerned. The delicate face remained still, neither turning nor answering.

 

Only when Phrawut lowered himself onto the bench beside him did Kaewta slowly turn to look. But the man said no more, sitting quietly as time passed so long that it seemed to stretch interminably for Kaewta until his father emerged to summon them home.

 

Amidst the car's silence, Khun Sone glanced at the young man sitting beside the driver and his only son seated alongside, then spoke: "Phrawut, how is Khun Piangfah? You two got along well. I'll be hearing good news soon.

 

"I-"

 

"No need to rush to decline. Take some time to get to know each other first. You know I've always regarded you as my own son. If you were to marry a woman worthy of you, it would truly bring me joy." Khun Sone cut in, knowing the young man would refuse as he always did when this subject arose. Those words came from the heart; they regarded him as a son. Phrawut was fully aware of it, so he chose to remain silent. He glanced at the smaller figure who had remained wordless throughout the journey and sighed.

 

The other passenger, who had heard everything, sat motionless despite his fierce palpitations. Disappointment at not hearing the expected refusal clanged like a cruel bell in his chest. Why hadn't Phrawut rejected Father? Why did he let his father's wishes hang there like something he might agree to?

 

Those narrow eyes reddened as he averted his gaze to the window, studying his own reflection with growing bitterness. Of course, what had he expected when he himself had done nothing? Where should he begin?

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The tall man halted in front of the small figure, his gaze resting on Great-Great-Grandmother Ruedee. He sat back on his heels, bringing himself level with the smooth face, while his eyes took in the winsome features with brimming, deranged affection, which he had already tried to restrain from bursting forth. In Khun Sone's view, he shouldn't love Kaewta because Kaewta was too young, and most of all, Kaewta was a boy, and so? Kaewta had already turned twenty-one, no longer a child as in those bygone days, so why couldn't he love Kaewta? It wasn't until two years ago, after his return from overseas, that he truly had the chance to be close to Kaewta.

 

That evening, after returning from the soirée, Khun Sone finally resolved to broach the matter. He wanted him towed, Piangfah. Khun Sone was well aware of how Phrawut felt about Kaewta. He contended that Kaewta was too young, and worse still, Kaewta was a man. The love between two men, in the eyes of others, would never be seen as anything noble. He should sever these feelings. But how could he? Phrawut had loved Kaewta for so long, since lifetimes past. How could one simply cast aside such a bond? Thus, he must seal away his every gesture, every glance, keeping them hidden from Khun Sone's watchful eye. But today, this very moment, his yearning for Kaewta consumed him. 

 

The feeling ached so fiercely it threatened to spill over. In Kaewta's absence, he could hardly eat. Without that beloved voice, it felt as though some vital essence had been torn from his very existence. He missed Kaewta so desperately. A slender finger caressed the smooth cheek, leaving a light trace, then it trailed down to the round tip of his nose, and then to the carmine lips. He froze when his own nose unwittingly drew close to the other's, then withdrew his hand and heaved a heavy sigh.

 

The young man's gaze roamed over the slim figure before stopping on a silver necklace, shrouded beneath the shirt. He tugged it outward; his once-withered heart suddenly bloomed, a lively elation beating within. His full lips curled into a smile. He wanted to snatch the darling boy into his hold, only to banish the thought upon realising it might frighten the little one, making him seem unseemly. Thus, he only resolved to grasp it in his palm....Another ring

 

Kaewta kept his ring to himself. He couldn't be happier! And upon having another ring, Kaewta could recall their mutual past as well? The man stared at that unmarred face once more as he wondered why the boy deliberately kept him at a distance. If the boy remembered, he should have shown it, shouldn't he? Did he not remember yet, or had he simply grown out of love? If Kaewta couldn't remember anything, or he could but his love had already slipped by, what then was he to do?

...Just start anew, the voice within told him.

 

With a deep breath, he let his gaze rest on that flawless face before he turned his back and walked away. It no longer mattered whether Kaewta remembered him; he had made his choice. He would make Kaewta fall in love ever again. For months now, he had done nothing but avoid the other-no visits to the White Manor, no shared table, no willingness to exchange words, nor even to meet his eyes, though that last was the hardest of all, nearly impossible. 

 

Ever since that evening, the woman who had danced with him at the banquet had often come to visit. However much it tore at him when Phrawut seemed so happy to see her, Kaewta could only play unaffected, but it was just a mask he wore every time he saw the tall figure with another woman. Inside, it pierced him like a needle to the heart. That pain never eased; it only grew sharper when he overheard his father arranging a love match for the young man.

 

Whenever he closed his eyes, certain images would rise unbidden in his mind, stirring something fragile within him. At times, it was the fear of Phrawut's impassive demeanour, and at others, it was quiet hope when the man drew near. And sometimes, his heart would tremble when Phrawut seemed to recall something and called his name in that deep, velvet voice, "Kaewta." He cherished that feeling.

 

Kaewta drew a long breath and rose to his feet. His gaze turned to the White Manor, steady and resolute. He had chosen this path: he longed to hear that voice calling his name for the rest of his life. He wanted to see that arresting smile, those sorrowful eyes fixed upon him every waking moment. Thus, he had to do something. He had to act before he became someone else's, before Phrawut's love belonged to someone else. To win his love back from Khun Yai.

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The tall figure came to a sudden halt when his peripheral vision caught sight of someone by the riverside pavilion. The sight left him motionless. He hadn't thought he'd see the boy here after months of absence. He was still in the dark about why the boy had ceased coming to the White Manor, especially when he had proudly declared the place his own only to vanish for a long time.

 

"Kaewta."

"..." The boy turned to look, then resumed his attention to the sketching canvas.

"In all my time here, this is the first time I've seen Kaewta drawing."

"I just felt like drawing to help me focus better," Phrawut nodded.

 

"So, what are you drawing? Can you draw me sometime?" Having asked, he chuckled to himself. This dialogue mirrored the past in every single word.

 

"If you don't mind being my model." The genteel voice mumbled, yet the listener still heard it distinctly. His eyes widened, gaze drifting down to the reddened cheek of the petite boy who turned away the instant that sentence escaped those lips.

 

"Not at all! Anytime you wish." Phrawut answered with his heart alight. He stepped toward the other, only to be interrupted by the maid's voice, informing him that Piangfah was waiting at the main house. Since he had never allowed anyone outside the Rom Ruedee into the White Manor, Piangfah was always made to stay there whenever she visited.

 

The man cast a glance at Kaewta, as if loath to part ways, but politeness demanded he see the young lady waiting for him. Kaewta, who'd feigned indifference just moments ago, now watched his broad-shouldered figure leave in a sour mood, but then broke into a sly grin a short while later. He set down his pencil and dashed after Phrawut.

 

"Fah was hoping to invite you to dinner." She made her intention clear, even though she knew he saw her as no more than the daughter of an executive. Still, Piangfah believed that if she kept pursuing him, perhaps he might one day relent and let her into his life.

 

"Well, I..."

 

"Khun Yai already has a plan with me. I'm afraid he won't be able to go with you, Phi Fah."

 

"Hmm?" To his surprise, Phrawut turned to look at the speaker, whom he hadn't realised had followed. And now the boy was sitting next to him, so close that the warmth of that arm passed onto his own. The interruption stopped her cold. She stared at the boy before her and greeted him with a smile.

 

"Hello, Kaew."

"Hello, Phi Fah." The boy raised his hands to wai.

 

"About what you said-er-Khun Phrawut..."

"Yes. Khun Yai won't be able to go out with Phi Fah, because he made an appointment with me first."

 

"Is that so?" That was all Piangfah managed when Phrawut nodded to Kaewta's words. The young lady excused herself, confusion swirling within her. She recalled, at the company banquet, whose figure the young man's eyes had fixed upon. Were the two of them of one heart now?

 

Piangfah wished her own assumption would prove wrong, yet what her eyes had just seen laid everything bare without need of further explanation. It seemed her heart would have to find someone to bind it up.

 

"Will you be drawing me today, Kaewta?" The young man studied the one seated beside him with a searching gaze. The other remained quite still, so he was the one to speak.

 

"No. I think another day would be better." Kaewta rose, wearing a feigned indifference as he prepared to walk away, only for the young man's large hand to close around the slender arm. Kaewta glanced at Phrawut's handsome face, lifted in a smile, then turned his own away.

 

"But Kaew has already made today free for me."

 

"In that case, should I call Phi Fah back? Or if you hurry after her now, you should still catch her." The sweet voice turned cloudy; the red mouth tipped up in pique, and the watcher hid a small thrill of gladness in his chest. The young man did not answer. He still held the slight wrist and did not let go. Hearing no reply, Kaewta knit his brows and turned back in puzzlement.

 

"Do you want me to go?"

 

"..."

"I don't want to go. I would rather stay with you."

 

"S-stay with me? Why?" The charming face that had been scowling a moment ago now bloomed with a flush, smooth cheeks suffused with red. The sweet voice trembled with nerves, making the onlooker all the more tempted to tease.

 

"I don't know... If Kaewta really wants the answer, perhaps you'll have to spend the entire day with me," Phrawut said with a small, teasing smile. Seeing the flustered look on the lovely boy's face genuinely lit up his heart. The smaller figure didn't pull his arm away from the young man's grasp. His heart pounded fiercely-he feared that if he opened his mouth to speak even a single word, it would surely leap right out of his chest. Stealing a glance at the tall figure's contented smile made him wonder fleetingly if the other was teasing him somehow.

 

"Kaew!" A stern voice thundered. Khun Sone, who had just returned from outside on business, rushed forward upon seeing Phrawut holding his son's arm without letting go. The young man still gripped the pale wrist firmly. The tall figure raised his gaze to meet Khun Sone's unwavering stare.

 

"I've told Yai before-my son is a man!" Khun Sone bellowed, infuriated at what he saw as Phrawut acting as if he had disregarded his warning

 

"I know full well, sir, and I believe that you also know full well how I feel about your son," Phrawut answered plainly.

 

"Yai!"

"From the day I returned from China two years ago and met Kaewta again, my feelings were unshaken...Not even from lifetimes ago."

 

"Do you even realise what you're doing? Biting the hand that feeds you!"

 

"I never have any intention of betraying your trust or acting ungratefully toward you, Uncle."

 

"Then what would you call it!"

"Love, sir. What I feel for Kaewta, I call it love..."

 

Lost for words, Khun Sone clenched his fists. Fury blazed as he shot a hostile glare at the man before him. At that, Phrawut dropped to his knees, back straight and gaze unwavering. He looked up at Khun Sone.

 

"Please give me a chance. Let me love Kaewta... Ugh!"The young man's sentence was cut short as pain shot through his left eyebrow so sharply that his vision momentarily blurred. Khun Sone, unable to control his rage, had hurled a paperweight at his face with full force. Crimson blood spilt from the gash at his brow, streaking down his cheek and jawline, then dripping onto his shirt in scattered stains. Phrawut gritted his teeth against the pain and looked up at Khun Sone once more.

 

"Even if Uncle were to beat me to death right here, I would still stand by what I said: I love Kaewta. I will not stop. I will never love him any less." Khun Sone lowered his hand. The sight of the kneeling young man, blood flowing freely from his brow, softened him inside. The previous anger faded to almost nothing.

 

"I only ask that Uncle accept me, give me the chance to love Kaewta"

"And does Kaewta love you?" Khun Sone asked.

 

"..."

"Yai loves Kaew, but what if Kaew doesn't love you back?"

 

"I would love Kaewta still, sir. I wouldn't force him to return my feelings." But he would do whatever it took to win Kaewta's love.

 

"And then what?"

"Let me show him how much I love him."

 

"And if he never does?"

"Then I'll abide by your wishes, sir."

 

"You won't try to turn Kaew gay like you, seduce him, or lead him astray, will you?"

 

"I would never do such a thing." Kaewta is grown now. The boy can make his own decisions. No one can influence or decide for him.

 

"Suppose Kaewta agrees to be with you. He might just be confused." Khun Sone tried to find an argument.

 

"Then I will make certain that if he does love me, it's not because of confusion."

 

"..." Khun Sone sighed, looking at the one he loved like a son, and felt a wave of sympathy. He turned his back, clasping his hands behind him and sighing. "Get up."

 

"Pardon?"

 

"I'll give you a chance. But if you want to make it official, you'll have to wait until Kaewta graduates from university." At these words, the young man nearly shouted with joy. The pain at his brow was all but forgotten, replaced by elation. He gave a wai to Khun Sone in deep gratitude. It was all right. Kaewta would graduate in just over a year. By then, Khun Sone wouldn't stand in their way anymore.

 

The small figure hiding by the door startled when it opened. He'd meant to slip away, but upon seeing the tall figure's face clearly, he had to stop and turn back, looking at the other in shock.

 

"That wound! What happened! Did my father hurt you?" Kaewta rushed forward in alarm to examine the injury, forgetting his usual composed demeanour with Phrawut. His pale hands trembled as they rose to touch the split eyebrow lightly.

 

"Just a down payment."

 

"Down payment for what? Never mind that, let's treat the wound first. Or should we go to the hospital?" The smaller figure spun left and right, unsure of where to begin. Phrawut chuckled softly, catching the boy's wrist to bring him back from his stupor.

 

"Kaewta, please calm down. Let's go downstairs and dress the wound first." The young man smiled fondly. Kaewta nodded rapidly, calling out to the household to bring medical supplies. Porn exclaimed in shock upon seeing Khun Phrawut's bloodied, handsome face and scrambled to gather medicine for young master Kaew.

 

"What medicine do I even use for this?" The boy frowned at the medicine box, confused. After wiping away all the blood from that face, the wound still bled steadily.

 

"Uh..." At that, worry crept into him at the memory of a past incident. "I think you should just bandage it, Kaewta, and head to the hospital." Kaewta read the other's demeanour thoughtfully before nodding in assent and calling for the driver to take them both to the hospital.

 

'Love, sir. What I feel for Kaewta, I call it love...'

 

The small figure tossed and turned restlessly. Phrawut's words still echoed in his ears. He hadn't meant to eavesdrop on the young man's conversation with his father, but seeing his father's manner had made him anxious enough to wait outside the room to inquire. The voices in the heat argument had shaken him to his core. From pacing back and forth, he had frozen still, his heart suddenly pounding so hard it ached in his chest.

Those words had fiercely stirred something within him. A burning sensation surged through his inner eyes, almost condensing into tears. After so much hesitation, Kaewta had now resolved that he would do whatever it took to make Phrawut's feelings stay with him.

 

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'See you at the theatre at five.'

 

The young man frowned slightly as he read the message on his phone, puzzled as to why Kaewta wanted to meet him there. He slipped the device back into his pocket and set off at once, not wishing to keep the boy waiting. Ever since Khun Sone had permitted him to display his affection for Kaewta openly, he had become the boy's devoted chauffeur, collecting him from university nearly every day.

 

When meetings kept him occupied, and once Kaewta had finished his classes, he would dispatch someone to bring the boy to the company to wait so that they could return home together. And if Kaewta wanted to go out with friends, Kaewta would just notify him, and Phrawut would be there to take him home when Kaewta's event was over. At first, the other had been bewildered by his care, but Phrawut always managed to find excuses to explain it away. Now Kaewta had grown accustomed to having this constant driver at his beck and call. 

 

Sometimes, after classes concluded, the boy would arrange for Phrawut to pick him up at the cinema, and occasionally, Phrawut would even join him inside to watch a film. Today, however, was peculiar. Kaewta asked him to come to the theatre instead. The man's lips curved upward as he hummed along to the radio with his spirits soaring.

 

"Have you been waiting long, Khun Yai?" Kaewta asked.

 

"Only a moment. But why did you ask me to collect you here?" The boy gave no reply; instead, he glanced at his wristwatch and urged him to follow.

 

"I wanted to see Khon."

 

"Oh?" The man's eyebrow arched in surprise, but no sooner had the question escaped his lips than he was pulled inside the theatre. Thus, Phrawut phoned Khun Sone to say that they would be returning home a little late, for Kaewta wished to see khon. The elder man let out a displeased huff for a moment before he granted permission, knowing full well it was his loving son who had orchestrated the evening.

 

O Chui Chai,

How light you glide,

Each silken step is a sweeping tide;

You sway, you mask in borrowed sheen-

A mirror of fair Sita's queen.

When Rama met that radiant view,

His warrior's heart stood still and rue.

O beauty-queen, your dazzling grace

Enchants all eyes that find your face;

Awake or dreaming, souls implore

One fleeting glance, then beg for more.

Your loveliness, a tempered dart,

Drives through the ramparts of my heart.

"This episode. It's..." The young man turned to look at the one beside him as the characters appeared on stage and the music began to rise.

 

"Yes, it's the Khon: Nang Loy episode," Kaewta said with a smile, then turned back to face the stage performance, completely unaware of where his companion had settled his gaze. Phrawut stared fixedly at Kaewta's side profile in silence. That lovely face was framed by raven-black hair that Kaewta allowed to grow past his shoulders. 

 

Ever since the third year at university, Kaewta had been growing his hair longer. He refused to cut it despite Khun Sone's frequent complaints. With each passing day, the Kaewta before him resembled more and more that person from long ago.

 

With hands clenched, Phrawut's heart pounded so violently it drowned out all other sounds. The rhythmic verses still rang in his ears, but he saw a slight figure who had worn that very costume ages past; Kaewta had once performed this exact Khon piece. With trembling hands, the young man reached up to that smooth cheek lightly, causing the boy to turn in surprise. Those narrow eyes met his gaze.

 

"Kaewta..."

"..."

 

"I'd prefer to see you transform into Sita." The deep voice murmured as if delirious. The owner of those tapering eyes lowered his gaze, his smooth cheeks flushing red. The hand cupping his cheek sent a surge of warmth that shook him deeply in the chest.

 

"Well... if there's ever a chance."

 

"Yes? What did Kaewta say?" The young man snapped out of his trance, withdrawing his hand before asking again.

 

"It's nothing," Kaewta paused, brushing off the question before turning his gaze back to the Khon performance with a troubled mind.

 

"The Khon today is quite entertaining..." Phrawut forced a smile while turning to watch the stage. Indignantly, Kaewta stole a glance at the man beside him, who continued to watch the performance. Could this still not trigger his memory? This thought gnawed at him, so much so that he barely registered what was happening on stage. Only when the tall man nudged him, signalling that the performance had ended, did he realise that he was consumed by the thought of how to make Phrawut recall the past. When that moment came, he would let the man know, and he would say the words he had kept locked inside himself for so long.

 

Little did he know that Phrawut had barely watched any of the Khon on stage as well. He had spent the entire time staring at Kaewta as he reminisced about the boy performing this Khon piece so long ago.

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Kaewta looked up at the sound of approaching footsteps that halted before the waterside pavilion. Tilting his head in mild curiosity, he saw Phrawut holding a sheaf of papers against his chest.

 

"May I join you?" The man asked, stepping into the pavilion. The boy shifted the books on the table, stacking them to make room for the other's paperwork he had brought with him. Por brought over a tray of Aluat sweets and two glasses of bael fruit juice that the man had ordered earlier. She glanced at young Master Kaewta, now quietly absorbed in his book, seated across from the other person who was just as engrossed in his documents. 

 

A soft smile tugged at her lips. It seemed her young master was becoming the boy he was when he loved to claim the White Manor as his sole property. Lately, Master Kaewta had been visiting here almost daily. Though he no longer played upstairs as before, he remained insistent, asking when Phrawut would finally concede and hand it over.

 

"Is Khun Yai free next Friday?" Phrawut looked up from his papers at the question, checking his appointment calendar on his phone.

 

"Hmm, it seems I have a meeting scheduled."

"Is something the matter, Kaewta?"

 

"..Nothing," the boy cut short, returning his attention to his book, though his heart deflated like a punctured balloon losing air. Despite the courage he had mustered to ask the other person, it seemed his carefully laid plans crumbled before they'd even begun.

 

The man observed Kaewta's crestfallen expression with dismay. Had Kaewta wanted something of him? Was that why he had asked such a question? He longed to probe for answers, but knowing how stubborn the person before him could be, he resigned himself. When it came to work matters, Kaewta never acted on a whim, not even with Khun Sone; Kaewta would never act spoiled about professional obligations.

 

"Hmm, was it something about the university?"

 

"Yes, sir. He said he would be performing in a play or something next Friday." The man nodded in understanding after asking Porn, who likely knew the most about household matters. Now it dawned on him why Kaewta looked so dejected when he'd said he was tied up with work. In this case, even Khun Sone wouldn't be able to attend. What to do?

 

Gazing at the documents before him, Phrawut resolved to burn the midnight oil and steeled himself to work, thinking that perhaps by next Friday, he wouldn't be able to pick up Kaewta from university after all.

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The boy stood frozen upon seeing a familiar figure arriving as a guest at the Rom Ruedee House. He raised his hands in greeting to the young woman who dropped into a seat beside Phrawut.

 

"Isn't Kaew going out anywhere today?" Piangfah asked with a smile.

"What about you, Phi Fah?"

 

*I'm here to take Khun Phrawut to see the site of the new resort project in Amphawa. It's his own brainchild, you know," she said, casting the man a look full of admiration.

 

"Won't the locals mind building a resort here?" Kaewta asked, his brow raised.

 

"It's more of a homestay project to blend with the local way of life. There should be no objection." Phrawut answered the question himself.

 

"In that case, may I come along?"

 

The man looked at the speaker but didn't dissuade him. He just smiled and nodded in agreement. It was even better to have Kaewta come along, for he wanted to spend every moment with Kaewta as well.

 

Piangfah suppressed a smile, observing the boy's sulky demeanour, and thought that she might be able to help Phrawut somehow during this business trip.

 

Kaewta observed the workers constructing a modest dwelling before him, then glanced back at Phrawut's tall frame, engrossed in a serious discussion with the labourers. Boredom consumed him, so he asked to stroll the market area, and Piangfah accompanied him. Neither had thought about how crowded the Amphawa market would be on a public holiday. 

 

By the time Kaewta managed to push through, he'd been jostled considerably. Piangfah suggested they rest and eat something before continuing. After their meal, on the walk back toward the resort, Kaewta collided forcefully with a tourist. He stumbled backwards and was separated from Piangfah in the crush of people. 

 

Panic rising, she craned her neck to search for the boy, frantic at the thought that he might have been hurt in the throng. If that were the case, she'd feel terribly guilty, having been the one to invite him out.

 

CLINK

The woman cast her gaze downward to retrieve what had fallen, then examined it in bafflement. Looking around, she saw no one searching for lost property, so she decided to keep it for now and make an announcement later to find its owner. She made her way back to the resort site, where Phrawut was still supervising the workers.

 

"Where's Kaew?" Piangfah asked the man, still deep in discussion with his crew, as her eyes scanned for that person.

 

"Wasn't Kaew with you?" Phrawut's brow furrowed with concern.

 

"Well, in the market earlier, Kaew bumped into other tourists, and we got separated in the crowd. And I found this... someone must have dropped it. I thought I'd put out a notice and find the owner..." Piangfah pulled a gold ring from her purse to show him.

 

"This is..." The tall figure stared at the ring unblinkingly.

"Do you know whose it is, Khun Phrawut?"

 

"It's Kaewta's," he said softly, reaching to take the ring from the woman.

 

"Is that so? But isn't this ring too large for Kaew's fingers?" Piangfah said with a chuckle and peered at the band, then gasped lightly. Inside the ring, engraved in tiny script:..For eternity...

 

"I'll give it to Kaewta myself," the man said, plucking the ring from her hand.

 

"Let me look just a moment more, please?" Piangfah pleaded with an imploring expression. She hadn't examined it properly yet. The man sighed and placed the ring back in the woman's palm. Piangfah cast a grateful smile, playfully sliding the ring onto her own finger before the man could stop her.

 

"You!" The tender voice shrieked.

 

"Oh! Kaew!" Piangfah exclaimed, startled, as the boy suddenly seized her hand, roughly pulling off the ring.

 

She turned to Phrawut, in case he might have an explanation for Kaew's violent reaction. However, the man looked even more stricken than she did. That handsome face had drained of colour while those eyes were fixed upon Kaewta. It seemed he wanted to say something, but before he could speak, a small palm struck his right cheek with full force.

 

"Even if you can't remember anything, you have no right to let someone else wear this ring!" His luscious voice trembled, eyes glistening with unshed tears. Lips pressed into a line, he clutched the ring. Tight in his fist, he ran.

 

"Kaewta! Wait, listen to me!" The man chased after him once he'd regained his senses. Piangfah watched them both in stunned silence. Everything began to fall into place, and she exclaimed.

 

"Or did I just come between them? Oh no! What have I done!" The woman could only lament, thinking of how to find an opportunity to explain to Kaew that he had gotten it all wrong. She'd only wanted to try on the ring. Khun Phrawut hadn't given it to her. But shortly after, Piangfah received an urgent call to return to Bangkok because the Singapore branch had encountered some problems. She was required to return to Bangkok at once and fly out by evening, leaving no time to clarify the misunderstanding with Kaewta as she'd intended.

 

Kaewta gripped the ring tight, his fingers trembling as a rush of hurt surged through him until it broke loose as tears slipped down his cheeks. He wiped them away with a careless arm, pulled the necklace free, and looped the ring through, fastening it back around his neck.

 

As he left the market, he felt a strange emptiness at his collar. Only when he checked did he see the chain had snapped. The necklace still hung from his shirt pocket, but the ring had gone. He returned to the market to search, but it was nowhere to be found. He thought of asking Phrawut for a worker's help. But before he could, the sight that shattered him unfolded before his eyes. 

 

For a heartbeat, he felt joy to know that it hadn't disappeared after all. His heart raced when he saw the tall figure pick it up, only to be torn apart the next second, as that same hand placed the ring into Piangfah's palm and let her wear it. It was as if the sky caved in and darkness fell over his eyes. He could barely stand the thought that the ring might now belong to someone else. A silent sob tore through him, heart aching as though it would split apart.

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The tall man in a tailored suit drew attention from professors and students alike as he passed. Some volunteered to escort him after he asked for directions to the theatre hall. Since returning from Amphawa, the young man had found that Kaewta had done nothing but avoid him, leaving not even a trace of his shadow or his voice. 

 

He eventually learned from Porn that Kaewta had asked Khun Sone for permission to stay over at a friend's house to prepare for the performance. And strangely enough, Khun Sone acted as if he, too, wished to keep his son far from him, even though he had always been a doting father who was usually so protective and never allowed his child to spend a night elsewhere.

 

A sigh escaped the young man as he recalled Khun Sone's expression. He came to a stop before the entrance and realised, too late, that he'd forgotten to ask the exact time of the performance from the student who had just walked him there. Without knowing the schedule, he debated with himself whether he should go back and check. But just then, a piece of music he knew by heart began to play.

 

His eyes widened. He stared at the stage in disbelief. If this were a dream, it would be the sweetest one he'd ever known. From behind the curtain stepped a familiar slender figure, who seemed to fill his every breath, gliding forward. The dainty face tilted gently in a poised gesture, crimson lips parting in an arresting smile. And then the image blurred, overlapping with his recollection...

 

O Chui Chai!

Thy divine form in ethereal dancing sways,

Her lithesome body and supple waist,

In splendid art by mortal hands arranged,

Two orbs of onyx, deep, darkest of shade,

Her coy glance leaves hearts dismayed.

O sylph-like fair,

The more one looks enthralled, the mind shall stray,

Both hands and arms in languid grace do play.

Each motion like Heaven's own arrayed,

Each wrist and limb in precise display,

Behold such beauty, pure God's ballet.

O laud-most lady,

Thy Brahmin grace and glory,

Skin unmarred,

Nor mire may tar,

She gleams alight,

Like a gold-leaf star.

The more one looks,

Praise shall not deplete.

O Lovely Sprite!

Thy youthful bloom,

Thy maiden sweet profuse,

Thy innocence does all gloom consume.

Once smiles curl,

Thy blushing cheeks suffuse.

I hold thee, Muse,

Like truth holds true.

 

The tall man moved forward as though unaware of himself, coming to a halt at the centre of the auditorium. The tapering eyes of the performer on stage widened upon seeing him, movements faltering for a brief second before continuing to the finale.

 

It took several moments for Phrawut to reclaim his composure. He requested permission to enter the performers' dressing room, and since many recognised the young man who regularly came to escort Kaewta, they allowed him in without question. His gaze swept the space, searching for the one who had set his heart racing moments before. When he caught sight of a pretty girl wiping his face, a gush of jealousy struck him square in the chest. Kaewta had removed the mask and cleansed away the stage makeup, but before the jewellery adorning that slender form could be removed, a strong hand seized his arm and yanked him around.

 

"What are you doing? Let me go!" The boy cried, struggling against the pull. The other man remained silent. His ears rang with a rising storm of jealousy and rage that he fought hard to contain while rapidly processing his tumultuous thoughts. He shoved the smaller figure into the car before sliding himself behind the wheel. Kaewta, in turn, displayed his fury, threatening to leap from the vehicle if Phrawut refused to explain this behaviour. A firm hand gripped his wrist and wouldn't let go. Neither of them spoke another word until they reached the White Manor.

 

"What on earth have you done?" Kaewta burst out the very second the car came to a stop. He flung open the door and stormed out, but didn't get far before he was pulled roughly back toward their residence by the tall man.

 

"Why did I let so much time slip away?"

 

"Huh?" Phrawut halted at the entrance, turning to gaze at that smooth face while still maintaining a loose hold on those delicate wrists. Kaewta raised an eyebrow in confusion.

 

"I should have known since that night we went to see the Khon play ... Nang Loy."

 

"..." Cherry-red lips pressed tight at those words, small eyes flickering as the boy watched the speaker.

 

"You were right before me all along, yet I didn't dare express myself, thinking you couldn't remember."

 

Kaewta no longer struggled against the taller man's grasp. He studied that handsome face, searching for meaning in those spoken words. The young man's gaze roamed over the smaller form with profound longing-the svelte figure still wore the white Chui Chai costume, silver cuffs on wrists and ankles glinting in the light. Yet nothing proved as captivating as that beautiful face in this moment.

 

"What are you saying?" Kaewta asked. The image of Phrawut and Piangfah from the previous week flashed across his mind. The boy abruptly wriggled his hand free and turned his face aside.

 

"You know exactly what I mean, Kaewta."

"..I don't. I don't know."

 

"You do. You've always known."

"...'

 

"I've missed you terribly, Little One." With eyes widened, the boy spun around to stare at the other in disbelief. Phrawut's striking features were now shadowed by emotion. Those enchanting eyes glistening with unshed tears.

 

"What did you just say?" The lovely voice asked softly.

 

"I’ve missed you terribly, Little One."

 

".." A rush of warmth bloomed in his chest, a happiness he hadn't felt in so long. The smooth face tilted up, studying the man before him. Those same enchanting eyes looked back at him as they always had, and that same baritone voice called his name, just as before, prompting the man's gentle fingers to rise and tenderly wipe the tears away.

 

"Forgive me, Love, for only now realising that Kaewta has been waiting for me, too."

 

"Who said I was waiting for you?" Kaewta brushed away the hand that was wiping his tears and took a step back. The gesture wounded the young man, his handsome face pallid as Kaewta withdrew.

 

"My Kaewta..."

"I wasn't waiting."

"If you weren't waiting, why did you keep that ring?"

 

"But you gave it to someone else!" Kaewta raised his voice in the instant those words ended. That lovely face crumpled after the words had left him. The tears streamed freely down his cheeks, making the observer's heart ache as if torn asunder at the image of small shoulders wracked with sobs. Phrawut inched closer to pull the boy into an embrace. Kaewta resisted and struggled at first, but then fell still, succumbing to the embrace that his heart had yearned for far too long.

Phrawut tightened his arms, whispering beside his ear.

 

"Kaewta, listen to me first. I love you, only you, truly."

 

"But you gave the ring to Phi Fah." The honeyed voice came muffled against the broad chest.

 

"I didn't give it to her. She merely asked to see it, and I couldn't stop her when she moved to slip it on her finger."

 

"You couldn't imagine how overjoyed I was to see that ring with you."

"Really?"

 

"Every single word is true." The young man smiled when Kaewta opened his mind and listened to the clarification. The tall figure gently pressed his chin against the soft hair with affection. "You believe me now, don't you?"

 

"I don't know."

 

"Come on, Love. Believe me. Have I ever lied to you?"The young man spoke with a soft laugh, pressing a tender kiss to Kaewta's crown.

 

"But the other ring..."

"Oh, it's right here." The young man pulled back slightly before pulling his necklace out from under his shirt, revealing another gold ring like Kaewta's, but smaller. The petite boy's eyes widened and beamed, his heart leaping in joy.

 

"How did you come by it?"

"When I first met Kaewta here."

 

"Ah, that time. No wonder. I must've brought it with me, so how could it have disappeared? When I found the other ring, I completely forgot about this one... for quite a long while."

 

"Back then, I didn't know what it meant either. I kept it, thinking I'd return it to you, but it slipped my mind as well." The young man spoke before leading the dainty boy into the White Manor. He stopped in the grand hall, where he lifted his gaze, scanning the residence.

 

"When did you recall the past?" Kaewta asked, his smooth cheeks flushing prettily. The young man drew in a deep breath, restraining himself, reminding himself not to be too forward with Kaewta while Khun Sone hadn't yet given full permission for their courtship.

 

"When I first entered this white house two years ago. Back then, Kaewta was nineteen, and I had just returned from China after being away for so long."

 

"Uh-huh, so much later than me." The young one boasted, tilting his head with loving charm. "And when did Kaewta remember? About us..."

 

"I've seen visions for as long as I can remember, and my heart would race whenever I thought of you, but I couldn't grasp what it meant then. It wasn't until five years ago that I finally interpreted those visions I'd seen all my life-that it was the love I've always held for Khun Yai."

 

Speechless, the tall one took in the unblemished face before his eyes. He loved this very person beyond words, so much that it threatened to spill, so much that it almost melted him away, to merge flesh, blood, and soul to become one with this person, inseparable forevermore. Phrawut felt a pang of guilt that by the time he remembered everything, he had kept Kaewta waiting for so long. As if the boy could read his thoughts, he chuckled and said, "It's all right. You once waited for me... It's my turn to wait for you, wouldn't kill."

 

"Thank you, Kaewta." Phrawut pulled the delicate figure into a tight embrace, his chest tingling with joy and bliss, knowing that this time, they had finally found their way to each other. No matter how long it took, they would always find their way back. Let the winds carry their love until they meet again. Let their hearts remember, etched deep into their souls....To love beyond span...

════[changbins_delulu_wife]════

 

The slight frame crossed his arms over his chest as the misty rain swept in, cool droplets brushing his skin but not enough to send a shiver coursing through him. His slender eyes gazed absently outside, a tender smile painted across his tender features as recollections from the past drifted into his mind. A rush of warmth in his chest was so overwhelming that he longed to let the other know.

 

It had been a full year since Phrawut first laid bare his heart to him. And just a week ago, he himself was a fresh graduate with a bachelor's degree in the field he had long set his hopes on. This morning, the other took him by the hand and led him into his father's workroom to both his father's and his own surprise.

 

"Kaewta has already graduated now. I believe it's time I properly ask for your permission, Uncle." Kaewta raised his brows, turning to glance at the profile of the man whose hand was clasped in his. Khun Sone met his son's gaze, then turned to the young man, silently giving leave to speak on.

 

"I've come to ask your permission to let me take care of Kaewta... for the rest of my life."

 

"Hm?" Khun Sone arched a brow, offering no reply.

 

"I mean... please allow Kaewta to become my life partner. Let him be my family, please." Kaewta's eyes flew wide at those words. His mind went utterly blank. Khun Sone gave his son a side glance, exhaled lightly, then spoke.

 

"And what do you say?"

 

"Say... what, Father?" The young man had only just managed to gather his wits.

"Well, he's here to ask that you become his family. Will you agree?" Khun Sone left out the word partner, choosing instead to look directly into his son's almond-shaped eyes. He had known for some time that Kaewta's heart was inclined toward Phrawut's just the same, but even so, a father's possessiveness was not so easily quelled. And so he handed the difficult decision to his son instead.

 

"..." Though in his heart, Kaewta had already consented to the man's proposal, he could not turn a blind eye to what lay behind his father's thought. And thus, he faltered to let the answer fly free.

 

"Kaewta, come live with me at our home... at the White Manor."

 

"..." Kaewta locked eyes with those luminous, pleading ones gazing back at him. His heart beat so wildly, so thunderously, he feared those gathered in the room might hear it. 

 

"Father, I want to be a part of Khun Yai's family." As his answer came to rest, the young man who had been waiting with bated breath pulled the smaller one into a tight embrace. His heart was so full of glee that he could no longer hold back the tears of joy. He wept through a smile....He had been waiting for so long...

 

Khun Sone beheld the sight before him with a tender smile, his heart at ease, knowing full well that his son would never regret the decision. Kaewta glanced up at his father and smiled so widely that his eyes crinkled. He thanked him in a soft murmur, then gently pushed away the towering crybaby of a man, lifting a hand to wipe the tears from his cheeks....The man whom he loved the most was beaming with joy because of him.

 

After dining with Father, Kaewta was instantly whisked away to the White Manor by the tall man. There, he blinked in astonishment, for nearly all of his belongings had already been moved into this manor. Better still, everything had been neatly arranged. He didn't even know when the other had ordered them transferred. The boy protested, concerned his father would be desolate. Yet, Phrawut argued that he had servants to keep him company. 

 

Now that Kaewta had married out, he could no longer live under the same roof as his father. What's more, the White Manor stood ten steps away from the main house. Kaewta pouted at that sensible excuse, cornering him until he had no words to argue. Yet Khun Sone darted out, knocking on White Manor's door and hauling him right back to the main house, leaving Phrawut's jaw agape in perplexity. Khun Sone told him.

 

"You two haven't married yet. How can you bring him to the bedchamber?" That one remark turned the young man into stone. It was a while before his senses returned to him. Hence, just one week later, the wedding was held modestly and hastily to suit the groom's haste. The ceremony consisted merely of a tea offering ritual and a brief prayer service held within the dwelling. No other guests were invited.

 

"What are you thinking about?" came a voice behind him, as strong arms enfolded his slender waist. The scent of fresh soap drifted over him, for the tall man had just stepped out of the bath. His prominent nose nuzzled against Kaewta's cheek, making the young one tilt his head away, giggling softly, still unaccustomed to such closeness.

 

That was because, throughout their courtship, the young man had done nothing more than hold his hand, kiss his hair, or kiss his hand. He had always treated Kaewta with the utmost reverence. When Kaewta once broached the topic, Phrawut replied that he was still far too young for such things. More importantly, he said, he must show honour and respect toward Khun Sone, who had entrusted him with his most beloved son. And that made Kaewta want to be the first to kiss him, because he was too unbearably sweet.

 

"Kaew wants to know... when did Khun Yai first fall in love with me?" the boy asked softly, referring to him by the name after Phrawut had granted him leave to do so.

 

"The present, you mean?" the man replied, and when Kaewta gave a slight nod, he considered his answer.

 

"It was when I saw you again, after being away from the White Manor for so long."

 

"Kaew's first year at the university?"

"Yes."

 

"I was only eighteen or nineteen then."

"Yes. You were still very young. That's why I had to restrain myself," Kaewta smiled, thinking he hadn't been that young.

 

"But... Khun Yai had recalled our past earlier, right?"

"And what of it if I had? Back then, you were far too young. You'd barely begun to grow into manhood," Phrawut chuckled.

 

"Does that mean you only fell for Kaew once I'd grown into manhood?"

 

"You can say so. But it was never in any unseemly way. Back then, I was simply grateful to have found you again. All I wanted was to see you grow up well and to be happy. If you couldn't recall our past, then so be it. I was content just like that. If you were to grow up, find someone to love, get married someday... I would have accepted it." He tightened the embrace around the boy in his arms. "And what about you?"

 

"Just like I told you," Kaewta said with a soft laugh. "It was the day you returned. That was the moment I knew for sure it was love. When Khun Yai called out to Kaew from the upper floor of the White Manor," He turned and wrapped his arms around the tall man. Phrawut held him closer, gently rocking him in his arms as if to lull him. The smaller boy closed his eyes, resting his cheek against the broad chest. "It felt like... we fell in love all over again," The hugger said.

 

Yes. Ever since I was a child, even before I could remember, I used to dream of someone. He always smiled and called my name with such a gentle voice... Kaewta... Kaewta... And when I first stepped into the White Manor, the images from the past slowly returned, bit by bit, night after night, in my dreams. Then I began to remember who I was... and who I had been waiting for. Until I met Khun Yai again, I didn't yet know what love meant. I just knew Khun Yai was kind. I wanted to see Khun Yai every day. I wanted Khun Yai to stay with Kaew for a long, long time-just like Father, just like Great-reat-Grandmother."

 

"Yet you were always teasing me," Phrawut teased.

"Because I wanted you to notice me."

 

"I'm sorry, Little One. It took me far longer than that to recall it." He apologised, but Kaewta only shook his head, conveying that it was fine.

 

"That day I ran into you, I'd only meant to look for the ring." The boy touched the pendant resting at his chest and smiled lightly. "That led me to find the man who lived in my dreams, finally."

 

"But still, I couldn't remember you." Kaewta gave a small nod.

 

"So Kaew kept playing tricks on you as a pastime. It was my way of getting back at you for not remembering, for leaving me behind. And because Kaew didn't want Khun Yai to forget me again." At those words, he fell silent, pondering all the ways he'd tormented the older man.

 

"Just like in the old days-exactly the same."

 

The young man tilted Kaewta's curving chin upward. He looked deep to let his enticing eyes speak before leaning down to peck a featherlight kiss, savouring the relish upon the soft petals of Kaewta's lips before invading the kiss, lingering there to drink in the moment until the smaller hands pressed against his chest and he turned away, gasping for air. Those cheeks were suffused with red all the way to both of his ears. The sight tugged a fond smile from the young man. 

One heated palm cupped the smooth cheek and coaxed Kaewta to meet his gaze. His eloquent eyes were filled with a silent yearning that conveyed just how much he craved the one facing him. Kaewta, heart pounding, lowered his eyes, daring not to respond to the stare, though he did not attempt to resist when the young man drew him close, arms winding around the slender waist before pressing kisses again.

 

A low, throaty moan escaped when the diminutive form returned the kiss. Their chests could attune to the reverberation of one another's racing heartbeats. Kaewta's half-lidded eyes followed the man's withdrawing lips, his cheeks even redder when strong hands skimmed from his waist to the curve of his hips, another hand trailing to graze his bare stomach and draw a startled quiver. 

 

A wave of tingling heat ran through him, spilling into every nerve until a veiled purr escaped his lips. His little hands wandered here and there all over the firm chest in response while the man claimed his mouth once more, this time with such fervent demand that Kaewta's knees gave way, requiring his support. He planted his nose against that fluffy cheek, then flicked the wee boy into his arms.

 

Phrawut sat at the edge of the bed with Kaewta on his lap. He looped his arms around the trimmed waist and pulled close, guiding that slender neck to bend low and kissing him. His palms roamed ceaselessly, the chill in the air prompting Kaewta to shiver. His eyes fluttered open in dazed wonder, oblivious that his shirt had slipped off him. 

 

A delicate chain, strung with a golden ring, now hung at the centre of his chest, glinting under the lamplight. Phrawut pressed a kiss to the ring and withdrew, his handsome face hovering close. His pert nose nuzzled into Kaewta's fragrant neck as lips gnawed and left traces. Murmured words, dulcet and low, fell from vermilion lips as curious hands explored Kaewta's skin, sometimes firm, sometimes light, drawing gasps and writhing free. But as time passed, it was Kaewta who closed in on the hand he meant to flee.

 

The well-shaped face tilted back when the man's heated lips branded on his chest, dipped and dwelled, chewed and stewed until a cry of pleasure broke out. Narrow shoulders slouched, and alabaster fingers dove through the man's soft hair, grasping as if to vent the ripple of aching sweetness, then tugging as a reflected delight when the man nipped at a tiny peak. His large hands kneaded his hips with force, another hand found its way beneath the fabric of his trousers, and slid them past radiant thighs. Fingers enfolded around the burning shaft, stroking in a steady rhythm until Kaewta's hips swayed involuntarily in search of more. Kaewta's teeth bit down on the lower lip as he gazed down at the man beneath him with heavy-lidded eyes.

 

He wanted to pull away, to flee from that searing hand, yet the moment it stilled, it was he who instinctively nudged his hips toward, pleading for more. This time, the young man's hand quickened fast enough to steal his breath away. Bliss darted high so sharply that Kaewta let out a sweet howl, prompting the man to smile before easing back onto the bed, letting the small form, panting from the recent rapture, rest upon his chest. His high-bridged nose pressed down against the crown of soft, sweat-dampened hair in a doting gesture.

 

Even before Kaewta's weariness eased, the warm hand already resting on his supple hip slid upward along the curve of his spine. The touch was light, yet it sent a tremor coursing through the delicate body, drawing him into the embrace. The other large hand left the heat of Kaewta's skin and shifted behind him, fingertips penetrating the volcanic cave without warning. The boy startled, propping himself up. Phrawut straightened to press a coaxing kiss beneath Kaewta's chin, then trailed down to nip at the pale curve of his neck and the flushed peaks of his chest. The jolt of pleasure that surged through Kaewta was electric, expelling all the apprehension within him. 

 

Patiently, Phrawut pressed his fingers inward, to the furthest length of his finger, then increased the number when the petite form was unguarded, moving in circles, arousing the boy into a second release. Only then did the taller man shift, reversing his position on top. His robust body was entirely in the raw, and so was the one within the cradle of his arms. Kaewta's gaze locked onto the golden ring hanging from a chain around the older man's neck. He shifted himself and kissed the very same ring, just as Phrawut had done to him. Their eyes entwined, the air between them still humming, before he plunged himself onto the mattress, letting the sharp pair of eyes leer over the porcelain skin.

 

Kaewta's enticing charm almost unravelled Phrawut's self-control. How the impeccable white skin starkly contrasted with the crimson silk sheet was indeed a sight to behold that made the man's heart hammer. The image so beguiled Phrawut before him. He bent to shower reverent kisses along every inch of Kaewta's body, full of passion.

 

His hands caressed and lightly lingered, competing with the honeyed moans. Velvet lips parted, gasping with every urgent touch, front and back alike. He eased his strokes but then wrapped fair-skinned legs around his waist. Kaewta flinched, throwing his arms around the taller man's neck when the searing heat pushed into his lower part until it hurt.

 

The narrow eyes were dampened with drops of tears, halting Phrawut's movements. The man kissed them away, soothed him with stillness before resuming to grind the kisses to rekindle the thrill, and then inserted himself again, bit by bit. The trimmed waist tarried for quite a while until the voice of the one beneath sweetly implored into his ear, and Phrawut thrust deeper, faster, pulling small hands to loop around his neck and planting a feathery kiss on one of them.

 

"I love you, Kaewta. I love you so deeply," he whispered the love confession tenderly. Kaewta blinked through heavy lashes and smiled at him. His lips, flushed red and swollen, moved in response.

 

"I love you too... I love you most..." His words dissolved into a moan. Hearing 

Kaewta's confession sent waves of elation coursing through Phrawut's core. He clenched his jaw, his mind filled with nothing but those three simple words and the pleasant sounds spilling from the boy's lips. He thrust harder, deepening himself to uncharted depths as if to bury himself in Kaewta completely, never parting, never letting go, forever and ever more.

 

Dainty little fingers laced with his, nails clawing into the back of Phrawut's hand as ecstasy pounced upon him, then pooled low in his stomach. His legs tightened around the man's waist, and his body swayed along the eager thrust. As Phrawut's pace hastened, Kaewta almost drowned from the overwhelming feeling. He loosened his hands that had been draping around the man to press against Phrawut's firm abdomen instead as a quiet plea for the man to slow down, unless he might truly fall dead.

 

Phrawut caught the boy's wrists, drawing both pale arms above his head, then drove forward with zealous force. Kaewta's moan crescendoed, intertwined with Phrawut's low groans as the final wave of rapture crashed down upon them. The little frame arched and convulsed, legs fastened tightly around the man above. His mind went all blank, his entire body squirmed in a dizzying ecstasy that left him breathless. Phrawut let out a long breath, his luminous eyes softening as he looked down at Kaewta, whose skin flushed pink from the storm of passion. He leaned down and affectionately kissed those reddened lips and kissed away the tears still clinging to the corners of Kaewta's eyes.

 

"So happy you're crying?" Kaewta balled his hand into a loose fist and gave Phrawut's shoulder a feeble thump, then sent him a dramatic glare despite still panting for air. Phrawut only chuckled and pressed another kiss on him. And another. And another still...

 

A stalwart hand swept the wet strands from Kaewta's brow. The man kissed away the sweat, trailed down to press a soft kiss to his nose, and stopped at his pliant lips at last. Only then did he slowly and carefully withdraw, the motion delicate, unrushed. Kaewta's brows knit in a sharp jolt of sensitivity, a faint gasp slipping from his lips. Phrawut drew the willowy form close to console him with his embrace.

 

"I'm sorry for being too rough... It's only because I love you too much, Kaewta," The gentle defence only earned him another glare from the boy in his arms, even if the man couldn't see it.

 

"I only let you because I love you just as much," came the soft murmur, whispering close against his broad chest. Phrawut couldn't quite catch it, asked what Kaewta had said, but Kaewta shook his head in refusal and buried his face against him even deeper to shield himself from leering eyes. After sending Kaewta rolling in coyness against his chest for a moment longer, the man finally undid the chain from around his neck, slid off the small ring, and leaned in to whisper beside his ear.

 

"Forgive me again for having taken you into the bedchamber before putting a ring on you." Kaewta's smooth cheeks flushed at those words, but the speaker only gave a contented chuckle and raised that delicate hand to slip the ring onto his finger meticulously. Then he pressed a kiss to the fourth finger of Kaewta's left hand.

 

"..." Kaewta slowly lifted the hand now bearing the ring and took it in. Joy welled up within him until it spilt the warm tears that cascaded down his cheeks.

 

"I love you, Kaewta." The smaller man gave an assenting nod, choking back a soft sob as emotion swelled within his chest. "And what about mine? Won't you put it on for me, too?" Phrawut added softly, lifting his left hand. A smile curved Kaewta's lips as he unfastened the necklace around his neck. He drew out the second ring and gently slid it onto Phrawut's left ring finger, then leaned in to kiss it as well. As he did, he nudged in, arms winding gently around the man's shoulders, and whispered sweetly in his ear:

 

"I love you too, Khun Yai." The mellow voice whispered, yet it was loud enough for the mind to hear. His handsome face was now adorned with a luminous smile. The eyes that had once been shadowed with grief now shimmered with quiet radiance.

 

The night was young, and Phrawut's insatiable love for Kaewta knew no bounds... so he bestowed pleasure upon him until the melodious cries grew hoarse. His sculpted lips wandered across the slope of Kaewta's shoulder, his nose grazing the soft hollow of his neck. The owner of that slender back shrank away, letting out a protest, for he was far too spent to indulge the man behind him any longer. Phrawut groaned in disappointment despite himself, prompting Kaewta to shoot him a sharp glance of disapproval. The man could only embrace him apologetically in return.

 

Kaewta unconsciously clung tightly to his neck when Phrawut wrapped him in a soft silk throw and lifted him in his arms, carrying him out to the balcony. The early morning air was chill, and with Phrawut clad in nothing but trousers, the smaller one instinctively pressed himself closer, sharing warmth between the two. The man kissed Kaewta on the cheek and drew him into his embrace.

 

"I won't ask you any promises anymore. I don't want to bind you because I know, and I believe, that Kaewta loves me the same way I love Kaewta."

 

"And I won't make promises either. But I will pray that we can love each other like this, for as long as time allows."

 

"Hmm... I believe that no matter how much time may have gone by, my love will remain with you for eternity."

 

"For eternity."

 

His small palm cradled the handsome face, pressing a tender kiss in place of a vow, sealing the overflowing love within. Their eyes met in soulful silence as delicate arms draped around that firm neck, and he let himself melt into the warmth of him while listening to the beat of the heart that, no matter how many years to come, would always beat in rhyme for one another's soul...forevermore.

 

To Love Is Just Enough.

It was many years ago, but he still remembered seeing a pretty little boy sitting alone, weeping outside the examination room. He was no older than ten, with skin as fair as milk, who had turned to look at his great-great-grandmother lying frail and unmoving on the hospital bed... then bolted out, choosing to shed his tears alone in a hidden spot out of her sight. A man, who was still a medical intern at the time and had been the one examining the old woman, followed the boy out.

 

"Why are you crying out here all alone?" He asked, crouching down until they were at the same eye level, facing the tearstained little one. "She might see me." The boy replied.

 

"And why would that be a bad thing?"

 

"She's always worried when she sees me cry... So I came out here instead." The doctor smiled faintly at that, brushing a tear from the boy's soft cheek with the back of his hand.

 

"You're a brave child."

"But I'm crying."

 

"Crying doesn't always mean you're weak." "

"But..."

 

"You should be by your great-great-grandmother's side at this time." He wanted the boy to go back inside to hold her hand before he could no longer. Her body was fading, worn by the years, but her thoughts, even then, were with this small boy she loved so dearly.

 

"Doctor... will she get better?"

 

"I don't know." That was one question he wished he could skip, yet one he couldn't lie about either.

 

"But why don't you know? You're a doctor." The little boy tilted his head, genuinely puzzled.

 

"Because I wasn't good enough, I suppose."

"When will you be good enough then?" The child still wasn't convinced.

 

"Perhaps when you're all grown up, I will be much more skilled at this." He raised a gentle hand to tousle the boy's soft hair with affection.

 

"So that's a long time away," came the reply, prompting a soft laugh from him before he gave the boy's back a gentle push toward the patient's room.

 

A few days later, the old woman passed on to the other side, never to return. The little boy sobbed so hard his body trembled in his father's embrace. Even the young doctor thought he should have been used to farewells like this by now, for he had witnessed them countless times earlier, but something about that child's tear-streaked face sent an inexplicable, sharp pang in the left side of his chest. As if, once upon a time... he had experienced the very same pain.

 

"Doctor Prem, thank you for coming." Khun Sone greeted him after the body of Great-Great-Grandmother Ruedee had been brought up to the cremation platform.

 

"Yes, sir." That was all he said. He then crouched down to speak to the boy. "Hello, Kaewta."

 

"Hello, sir." The little one returned his wai with polite precision. Doctor Prem smiled and gently wiped away the glistening tear stain on the boy's cheek. Those dark, pitch-black eyes struck a place in his heart that hadn't ached in years.

 

"You've cried so much your eyes are all swollen."

 

"Doctor Prem, would you like to join us for dinner?"Khun Sone interjected.

 

"I wouldn't want to impose. I'm afraid I have to head off soon."

 

"Oh? Are you going somewhere?" Khun Sone asked, having become familiar enough with the young doctor after a year of seeing him care for Great-Great-Grandmother Ruedee.

 

"To study abroad, sir."

"Is that so? Please visit us sometime once you return."

 

"Yes." He crouched once more beside the boy who still held tightly to the father's hand. "Kaewta."

 

"Yes?"

 

"When I come back... will you still remember me?" Even he himself wasn't too sure why he had asked that question.

 

"Of course, I will. Kaew will remember Phi Prem." The sincerity in the boy's eyes made something inside him whole. It was for Kaewta, who'd asked him when he would be good enough. It led him to decide to pursue further training in his speciality. The other reason... was that he wanted to wait until someone grew a little older.

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"Doctor Prem, please... I'm begging you," Khun Sone said with a troubled look on his face. This was an important trip he couldn't miss, but his stubborn son refused to let him attend the provincial conference because of his illness. No matter how much Khun Sone insisted it was nothing serious, just simply under the weather, the boy wouldn't allow it. In the end, Khun Sone had to phone Doctor Prem, hoping the presence of a medical expert in the travel party might put his son's mind at ease. But that still didn't earn Kaewta's trust. Kaewta insisted on accompanying his father himself.

 

"Yes. If that's what you need, Khun Sone." Prem replied with a smile as he watched the elder man's relieved expression, yet it only earned a scowl on the other's face. "You're so stubborn, Father."

 

"No, you are!" Khun Sone shot back, causing the furrow on his son's visage to become even tighter. Prem chuckled at the sight. Kaewta had grown up now. The once-small form had stretched tall and lean, blossoming into a striking young man. His voice rang bright and sanguine; the baby cheeks were long gone, leaving a more refined face in their place. Just as Prem was about to greet him, the shrill ring of a mobile phone interrupted. "Yes, Mother?"

 

"Prem, darling, when will you be coming home?"

"In a few days, I think. Is everything all right?"

 

"I just thought... perhaps you'd like to see Fah. You remember Fah, don't you? Wouldn't that be nice?"

 

"Mother.. let's talk about this later, shall we?" The man cut in. He actually wanted to walk over, say hello, and speak to the small frame helping his father onto the boat, while at Khun Sone's other arm was a tall figure he hadn't met, supporting the other side. Kaewta tilted his head up, casting a beautiful smile toward the man opposite him. That man with a striking face and soulful eyes looked back and smiled in return. The love glinting in those eyes was impossible to unsee, and it stabbed him right in the chest. Or was he too late?

 

"I'll call you later, Mother. I'm just about to board the boat."

 

Prem just watched, but he was too hesitant to approach. He told himself that everything he'd done until now had been for that person. But this time... this time he had returned for himself. To love for himself on the day he had come to know he had fallen in love. Drawing a deep breath, he gathered his courage and stepped toward the one he had longed for all these years.

 

"Kaew."

"Phi Prem!"

 

He remembered. Kaewta still remembered him! His heart leapt at the sight of that radiant smile. And at the very moment, the left side of his chest throbbed back to life. Their group was staying at a resort on the island, courtesy of the company. When night fell, everyone was free to unwind. Some went out for walks, others explored the nearby sights. As for him, he chose to remain at the hotel, keeping an eye on Khun Sone. With a bottle of tonic in hand, he knocked on the elder's door. But the one who answered made his pulse stutter all over again. He smiled when the petite figure greeted him with an even brighter smile.

 

"Is Khun Sone asleep?"

 

"Yes. I told him to rest, but he's so stubborn. Thanks to Khun Yai, he managed to persuade him."

 

"Khun Yai?" Kaewta froze for a beat, as if realising he had slipped out something he shouldn't have. He glanced up at the taller man, his smile turning sheepish.

 

"..My father's confidant." A faint blush bloomed across his cheeks at those words, sending a tremor through the one watching. "Thank you so much, Phi Prem, for coming with us." Kaewta ushered him into the sitting area and poured him a glass of water.

 

"It's nothing. I did it for you."

"Hm?"

 

"l."

"Yes?"

 

"I love you, Kaewta."

"What?"

 

"This might not be the best time to say it, but I want you to know." Something within him urged the words forward. The sooner he said it, the better. "I believe that you know it, too. From the first time we met, I could feel some connection."

 

"..."

"Back when you were only this tall." He lifted his hand to the level of his chest.

 

"It was a kind of connection I couldn't explain, a need to protect you. At the time, I thought I saw Kaewta as a younger brother." The man let out a low, ambered chuckle.

 

"Kaew..." The boy faltered as he rose from the sofa. Prem followed suit.

 

"Back then, it might not have been the kind of romantic love... but when I saw you again today, after all these years, Kaew, I think I've fallen for you. I... I'm asking you, may I have a chance?" His large hand gently caught the slender wrist, coaxing the other to turn and face him.

 

"..." The beautiful eyes shimmered with sorrow, and the tremor in his voice struck fear into Prem's heart.

 

"Does this trouble you, Kaew?"

 

"It's not that I'm troubled... but..."

"But what?"

 

"I'm sorry, Phi Prem. I'm so sorry..." The little frame held him fast, burying his face against Prem's chest as sobs escaped him... perhaps that was his answer.

 

"Kaew, please don't cry." Prem softly pushed his shoulders and tenderly brushed the tears away from those cheeks. He didn't wish to see him cry, didn't wish to see him pained, even slightly.

 

"Phi Prem... Kaew... Kaew-"

 

"Shhh. Hush now, my dear one." Prem drew him into another embrace. This time, he let him cry freely, holding him until the front of his shirt was soaked through with tears.

 

Prem's eyes met those of someone standing a short distance away, watching him and Kaewta, who were in each other's arms. The man just looked, smiled sadly, and then walked away without a sound. What was that look supposed to mean? Prem wondered, but he didn't loosen his hold on Kaewta to find out. He just wanted to hold Kaewta a little longer... just a little bit more.

════[changbins_delulu_wife]════

"Khun Yai." Prem's call reached the man standing quietly on the balcony, soaking in the night air. He turned at the sound, then stepped back into the room. A brandy glass hung loosely in his hand, the last sip clinging to the bottom.

 

"You're still awake, Khun Prem?"

 

"..." Even Prem himself wasn't sure what he was meant to say. So the other man took the chance to speak.

 

"I'm sorry."

"Eh?"

 

"I'm sorry," That voice was as shaken as the other's. Why did he receive two apologies in just one night?

 

"What are you apologising for, Khun Yai?"

 

"It happened a long time ago. You probably don't even remember."

"..Hmm?" Prem was still lost.

 

"Still, I wanted to say it again." Did this imply that Khun Yai had said those words before? "I'm sorry... and thank you."

 

Prem still couldn't catch it. But the other man said no more. His eyes, red-rimmed, were now teary and brimmed with remorse. The sight stirred sympathy in him as he watched. "That's enough, Khun Yai. Any more and you'll be completely drunk. We've got a journey tomorrow." He tried to stop him, just as the man filled the glass again and downed it in one swallow. Then came a weary smile from the other man.

 

"You can go to bed, Khun Prem. I'd like to stay a little longer."

 

That gaze drooped to avoid Prem's eyes. Prem sighed, then turned to leave.

 

"In that case... goodnight."

"Goodnight." Prem paused at the door with keys in hand. Maybe he should fetch some medicine for Khun Yai, or else he'd wake up with a pounding headache and would be too sick to work tomorrow. With that thought, he turned around and froze. His steps halted the instant he saw what was in front of him.

 

Khun Yai's finely sculpted face rested in serene slumber. On the same sofa sat another person, whose skin was smooth and luminous, offering a faint smile. He couldn't tell what sort of gaze Kaewta cast upon Khun Yai, but in the next moment, he went utterly still when that gentle face leaned forward, slow and soft, dusky lips brushed lightly against the tip of the soundly sleeping man's high-bridged nose.

 

It was as though the ground had crumbled beneath his feet. Even knowing he was unloved, it wasn't as excruciating as witnessing it with his own eyes. He swallowed back the sob and quietly took leave. It might have hurt not to be loved in return, but he never once regretted giving it.

 

"Oh!" The slight figure stumbled forward, nearly losing balance. He who had been watching all along instinctively rushed in to steady him. The one being held looked up and smiled. "Thank you, Phi Prem." He returned the gesture and glanced down at the boy's foot, where a bleeding cut marred his toe, drawing a sheepish smile from its owner.

 

"Does it hurt badly?" He asked, gently guiding Kaewta to a chair.

 

"No, it's fine. Phi Prem!" Kaewta's voice rose in surprise as the older man knelt and carefully lifted the injured foot onto his lap.

 

"Let me stop the bleeding first. I'll get the first aid kit in a moment." He slipped a handkerchief from his shirt pocket and dabbed gently at the wound. Then, folding the same cloth into a neat strip, he wrapped it softly around the injured toe.

 

"Phi Prem..."

"I know."

 

"..." He straightened to his full height and brushed a tear from Kaewta's cheek with the back of his knuckle.

 

"I know now... where your heart lies."

 

"Eh?"

"Don't cry."

"I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry." The boy's narrow shoulders quaked with the force of his sobs.

"Please... don't cry anymore."

 

"I just... I wanted to say thank you again."

"...Even words are the same."

 

"Sorry?"

"It's nothing. I'll be right back."

 

Prem gently cleaned the wound once more, dabbed on ointment, wrapped it with gauze, then pressed the final plaster over it before looking up and offering Kaewta a small smile. His broad palm still cradled that pale foot. For a moment, he held it there, then let out a faint sigh before slowly lowering Kaewta's now-clean foot back down.

 

"Phi Prem... Kaew..."

 

"It's alright. I'm fine," Prem said, rising to his feet and tidying the bandaging supplies. His eyes flicked briefly to the man standing in the doorway, who had not once torn his gaze off Kaewta.

 

"Why are you standing there, Khun Yai? Have you finished packing everything up already?" The tall figure of Khun Yai stood just outside the room, unmoving.

 

"Yes, I have."

"Then. Please take care of Kaewta for me."

 

"..Eh?" Khun Yai turned to face him. Prem gave him a small smile and reiterated.

 

"Take care of Kaewta for my part, Khun Yai."

"Khun Prem...?"

 

"But that doesn't mean I'm going anywhere," Prem said, his loud laughter puzzling the other person, and then he left.

 

"Mother?" He called to tell her of his decision. "I'll go see Nong Fah, just like you wished."

 

He knew full well he'd come too late, how slowly he acted. Thus, Kaewta's heart had already slipped from his grasp. He kept telling himself to wait a little longer, while beside Kaewta, someone else who had already been there might love him just as much, if not more. Strangely enough, despite knowing to whom Kaewta's heart belonged, he felt no bitterness or envy. On the contrary, he was glad to know there was someone who could love Kaewta so deeply. He didn't fall apart. It might hurt, but his smile persisted. Stepping aside didn't mean his love ran out. His passion for Kaewta was still intact. To love Kaewta was just enough.

 

I'll wish to meet thee still and seek the tide. Though thou become the vast and soundless sea, I'll be thy fish and swim to find but thee. Though thou become a lotus, pure and fair, I'll be the little bug that lingers there. To gaze upon the tender heart within. If thou become a beautiful, still cave, I'll be the swan-our pair made ever brave. I do but swear to follow, guard, and true, To be thy lover every life anew.