Interminable

The rustle of dry leaves crackling beneath the hurried steps blended with the owner's laboured, panicked breaths and the coppery stench thick in the air. Their haste caused the tall figure to stumble and fall, dragging the one supporting him down as well.

 

"Khun Phra Nai!"

 

"I'm... all right." The deep voice came in broken fragments. The pain from both old and new wounds crashed through him until his breathing turned short and rapid. And yet, the pallid-faced man still forced a smile to ease the other's worry.

 

"Let's hurry home..."

 

"No! We cannot return home. Not to any home."

 

"Then what are we to do? You're bleeding so much!" The sweet voice trembled as if on the verge of tears. The wounded one gave a faint, soft-hearted smile.

 

"Don't cry, Kaewta."

 

His strong hand reached up to touch the youth's clammy cheek to comfort, though the pain still pulled tight across his brow.

 

"I'm not crying!" The youth barked and rapidly wiped away the tears that threatened to fall.

 

"Shh... don't be so loud." The tall figure pressed a finger to those rosy-hued lips, signalling him to hush as they swept their surroundings. Though all around them was so pitch-dark that nothing could be seen, even the smallest sound might help their pursuers find them more easily. Kaewta clamped his lips shut and followed suit, casting his eyes about. "We must slip into the forest."

 

"What?"

"Go into..."

 

"But when you were wounded so severely, how are you supposed to go there?"

 

The youth faltered, glancing between the once-handsome face, now ghostly pale, and the looming darkness of the woods. Then, he shook his head in dissent. At the very least, returning to Luang Sanor's residence would be safer.

 

"To the east... There is a shelter that Saen and I built for when we went out on secret missions. It will be safer than returning home. They will surely come after me if they don't see my corpse."

 

The last sentence curdled Kaewta's blood; did they truly aim to take their lives? But there was no wiser option. Every word Khun Phra Nai said was nothing short of the truth. So Kaewta supported the other person in going to the east woods, as the man wished. 

 

They walked through the darkness, using the Pole Star as their guidance. After some time, they felt certain they had escaped pursuit.

 

The young noble unfastened his own tunic, wrapped it round a branch, and struck flint for a torch. His knees buckled from time to time, nearly sending him collapsing to the ground. Even though Kaewta begged him to rest, the youth only met with a feeble refusal. Resting in a forest this dark, armed with only one sword, was utterly folly; Kaewta understood, yet his worry for the tall figure outweighed all reason.

 

"It's not too far now..." The baritone voice rasped. The gentleman braced a palm against a tree whose sun-warmed bark faded its trunk and surrendered its heat to the chill. The waning moon climbed high past the mid-sky. At last, Kaewta caught sight of the silhouette of a small hut nestled beneath great boughs, lurking in the shadow. 

 

The youth quickened his pace, for the weight slumping upon his shoulder grew heavier with each step. And just as they reached the patio, Khun Phra Nai collapsed, senseless, where he stood right at the moment.

 

Panting hard, the slight youth half-dragged, half-lifted the taller form inside. The incident a moment ago had nearly made his heart stop when the tall man fell unconscious in the courtyard. The youth was seized with panic, so much so that he could scarcely cling to his wits. He cast wild glances about, uncertain where or how to begin for a long time, until he bent down and pressed his cheek to the broad chest. 

 

The fright in him soon subsided when he could hear the man's pulse. A rush of relief sent tears streaming down his cheeks; the youth let out a breath, his crimson lips curving into a smile. Laughter, choked with sobs, escaped him as he scrambled upright and hastened to drag the unconscious body of Khun Phra Nai into the hut.

 

The first thing Kaewta sought was a lantern, for the shirt Khun Phra Nai had sacrificed for tinder had long since burned away. It took some time and much fumbling as he knocked over several things before finally finding what he needed amidst the darkness. 

 

He bustled to and fro to start a fire, boil water, fetch blankets to cover the man's body, and rummaged for any medicine that might be stored there. The dawn slowly took over the sky. Kaewta's hand stopped once the blood was wiped clean, and then he applied a herbal salve to the wounds. Though he was totally clueless about what the medicine was, he was partially certain it could not be poison. Otherwise, Khun Phra Nai would not have kept such a thing upon his medicine shelf. 

 

He glanced at the statuesque face that was still drained of colour, and laid a hand to the broad forehead. Upon finding no trace of fever, he breathed out in relief. Only now did Kaewta crave rest from the full weight of exhaustion after the long night of fleeing and the strength of tending the injured man. 

 

Now that danger seemed to have passed, his tension unspooled. The fatigue finally overtook him as he tugged the blanket snugly around the man on the pallet, then slumped down beside him and drifted into sleep.

 

"Kaewta." A low voice called to the sleeping youth with tender concern. Khun Phra Nai tried to prop himself up, but was dissuaded in no time by the rippling of sharp pain.

 

"Khun Phra Nai." The lovely face crumpled as he raised his head. Narrow eyes blinked half-open, and the sweet lips pulled into a slight pout as he let out a yawn.

 

"Why are you sleeping sitting up like that? Why not come lie down beside me?"

 

"Hmm?" Kaewta frowned, still too newly roused to grasp the question.

 

"How long was I unconscious?" The man deftly steered the topic upon seeing the youth's puzzled expression.

 

He had no desire to quarrel with him so soon. The person who had been asked rose and pushed open a window to let the morning light pour in, estimating how much time he had to give the man an answer.

 

"It must be nearly noon." He stretched to expel stiffness. "P'll fetch water so you may wash, sir." He added before stepping out, leaving the man to inspect the wounds now covered with herbal balm. A frown knit his brow as he wondered where the youth had found such a remedy. 

 

His gaze fell upon the clutter strewn across the floor and the open bundle of herbs. Khun Phra Nai looked from the medicine's wrapping to his wounds and back again thrice. The pallor of his handsome features turned to stone. Words failed him, and the corners of his faint-colored lips twitched. An ominous feeling stirred within him; Had Kaewta truly daubed those herbs upon his wounds? The thought left the nobleman poised between laughter and tears; it seemed all too probable.

 

Once Kaewta returned, his brow arched at the other man's alarm. But he preempted him by saying quietly that it was nothing.

 

"Is there any food stored here, sir?"

 

"Hmm? Pardon?" The man asked back, for he hadn't heard the question. The smooth face too absorbed him, the jet-black tresses draped over that shoulder, the way those slender fingers tucked behind that delicate ear... lashes resting upon satin cheek, pert nose, rose-red lips...

 

"I asked if there's anything to eat here." The questioner's narrow brows knitted at having to repeat the question. That glittering gaze fixed upon him sent his heart thudding oddly, prompting Kaewta to raise his voice to drown that sound within his chest.

 

"Ah, there should be some,"

 

"Should be?" Now Kaewta's indignation turned to reality. Had not Khun Phra Nai said this cottage was often his base for confidential affairs? Why, then, had he not stocked it with proper necessities?

 

"Well... I just returned from my last assignment. Not even a month ago, I suppose," the tall man replied hastily under the withering look of the smaller fellow. That wasn't quite an impressive answer for Kaewta since his light-skinned arm was placed on his hip the very moment the sentence ceased.

 

"And you never bothered to stock up or replenish the stores at all?"

 

"Saen was usually responsible for this task... but currently, he's been rather busy."

"Heaven!" The youth cursed before releasing a sigh. "Then I shall find something for you to eat."

 

"Wait!" The tall man seized Kaewta's slender wrist before the youth could rise.

 

"Where will you find anything? Is there nothing here at all?"

 

"If there were some, would I be asking you, sir?" Kaewta shot him a dirty look.

 

"Then I shall go with you."

 

"You can't even sit straight, and yet you still dare talk tough!" Kaewta retorted icily; his contemptuous glance muted the young aristocrat at once, and he no longer ventured to accompany.

 

Though he knew full well that a patient ought to have nourishing fare, all the best Kaewta could seek were a few fruits and some tubers. He reckoned that if the young lord remained bedridden for more than five days, the two of them would certainly starve to death.

 

"I am all right, really. Fruits are acceptable, so no creature has to spare their lives to feed us." The tall man beamed widely, lifting a banana as he took a bite with exaggerated relish. But the petite youth offered no response, nibbling his roasted yams in silence, prompting the young lord to mute himself.

 

"I shall fetch some water."

 

"I'm going with you!" This time, no words were made by the young one; only a look of scorn was cast his way. The nobleman smiled sheepishly and attempted to rise.

 

"Let me accompany you, won't you? I can still manage to walk. Evening has fallen, and these woods can be perilous. I'd rather not have you go alone."

 

"As though the two of us would be safer together."

 

"If danger comes, I couldn't bear for you to face it alone. If there must be doom, I shall face the doom with you."

 

Those heartfelt words left Kaewta uncertain whether he ought to be touched or troubled. He had given no thought to danger or death in the same way that the other person uttered. He could not simply forsake his ailing mother and find peace in the afterlife. Besides, the one who seemed far more at risk from those who wished him harm wasn't that boastful man himself?

 

Kaewta gave the man's hand a sharp smack when he tried to help him fetch water. Even worse, the nobleman began searching the undergrowth for berries and roots for the incoming meals. In the end, the wound that Kaewta had so carefully treated with herbal salves split open, leading to fever once more, sending Kaewta into a full-blown fury.

 

The youth laid a damp cloth upon that broad, fevered forehead and exhaled a long breath. He could not say why this particular vigil felt more exhausting than the previous ones-perhaps there was no necessity close at hand, or the patient was hopelessly obstinate; who could tell?

 

POOF!

Kaewta startled upright at the strange sound outside the hut. He snatched the aristocrat's sword and held it tightly, sliding himself between the sleeping man and the door. Should anyone force their way in, he was ready to do whatever it took in the nobleman's defence, despite the trembling of his hands and his most soul-crushing fear.

 

Time seemed to stretch endlessly. The rustling noises crept closer and closer as his sweat beads oozed from his temples. The youth levelled the blade, trembling in his grip, toward the door, and did not even dare to blink. When the door burst open, the youth sprang forward and slashed with all his might!

 

"Whoa!" A familiar baritone shrieked before the small figure tumbled to the floor in a graceless heap, for his target had dodged just in time. "Danger! Danger!"

 

"Uh!" Kaewta turned toward the owner of the voice in shock.

 

"Why are you lying down there, Khun Kaew?" Saen called out with a light laugh as he approached, gently tugging the smaller man to his feet.

 

"Just for fun!" Kaewta shot him a glare and a curt reply, yet could not deny the delight at the sight of him.

 

"It's bitterly cold outside. I suggest you lie inside. Oh, even better, rest over there, where it's warm." Saen pointed to the space at the nobleman's side with a mischievous glint in his eyes. At once, Kaewta pointed the tip of his sword at the taller man, jaw clenched

 

"Don't act smart! Why didn't you make a sound when you came in? If I had been more skilled with a blade, wouldn't you be dead where you stand?"

 

"Because I know you hadn't been skilled, that's why I dared open the door." Saen cast a teasing grin, evoking Kaewta to throw the blade aimfully at the other person. However, all strength had drained away; Kaewta let himself drop heavily to the floor. He was worse for wear from the incident just now. Thus, Saen took over the task of tending to the injured. Saen had come laden with dried provisions, spare garments, and a bundle of herbal remedies.

 

"Hmm? Why is this wrapper of herbs left open?" Saen asked, noticing one of the pouches lying ajar.

 

"Oh, I used it for treating Khun Phra Nai's wound. Isn't that a medicinal herb?"

 

"What did you say you used it for?"

"I used it for treating Khun Phra Nai..."

 

Saen did not wait for him to finish. He dashed to his master, examined the gash, felt the pulse, and listened to the breathing. Finding nothing amiss, he let out a relieved sigh, then revealed the truth, prompting the young one to drop with his heart plummeting to his feet.

 

What Kaewta had mistaken for medicine and applied to Khun Phra Nai's wound was, in fact, mosquito-repelling herbs.

 

At the crack of dawn, Saen excused himself to take his leave. They had devised a plan to mislead those people into believing that the young nobleman remained in good health, utterly unscathed, with Saen disguised as the nobleman and visiting Luang Sanor's residence every dusk.

 

"Please, might you feed me a little?" the patient entreated in a low, plaintive murmur, yet the listener responded only with a scowl.

 

"Your hands are uninjured, aren't they?"

"But it aches when I raise and lower my arm,"

 

"Are you feigning it?"

"No! I'm being truthful!" Khun Phra Nai exclaimed with suspicious swiftness. The youth's long-lashed eyes narrowed in mistrust. The man's heart faltered a beat before he yielded, abandoning his wheedling tone.

 

"You'll have this favour only for now!" came the begrudging consent. The small hand seized the spoon with a faint huff and dipped it into the rice. Even so, each motion was tinged with care. Roseate lips blew gently upon the steaming mouthful before offering it to the gentleman. Khun Phra Nai accepted the bite with puffed cheeks and a smile most irksome to behold

 

"This meal is exquisite."

"You mean this plain rice and salted beef?" 

 

Kaewta lifted a brow at the humble fare; mere preserved meat, chilli paste, and foraged greens he had gathered with effort.

 

"Even the simplest rice would be the finest repast upon this earth, were it shared with you."

 

Though he wore a mask of irritation, the youth's smooth, flushed cheeks betrayed him. At such honeyed words, he nearly flung himself upon the youth to clasp him close and shower him with kisses born of tenderness and growing affection.

 

"Can't I just bathe with you?"

 

"Excuse me?!" Though the question was posed as though he had not heard the earlier remark, his eyes gleamed with a malicious glint.

 

"I'd love to bathe down there too!" The young man declared stubbornly like a willful child, shedding his shirt in one swift motion and poised to plunge into the brook.

 

"Stop right there!" the youth barked sharply, springing to his feet with hands on his hips in open vexation. "If your wound was wet and inflamed again, what then are we to do?"

 

"But..." Though Khun Phra Nai wanted to argue, the adorable figure before him looked too fearsome to him.

 

"No, but! I shall bathe quickly and return to wipe you down afterwards," said the youth before walking down the stream after he could rest assured that the man would now obey and wait without protest.

 

The young aristocrat revealed a sulky face at being thwarted. All he had wished for was a refreshing bath after being wiped down for days. Nevertheless, the brooding arrested the moment radiant skin rose above the surface; raven hair, soaked through, clung to the shapely curve of Kaewta's neck. 

 

Those shoulders were narrow, nothing like the masculine broad or square, just like Saen's or his own shoulder, shapely, tapering arms scrubbed gently over soft skin and the trim waist, though not as cinched as a maiden's, yet slender enough to set his pulse racing.

 

The young nobleman whipped his gaze away with an erratic heartbeat before deciding to sit with his back to the dainty bather. Even so, the images refused to leave his mind; conversely, they were still imprinted indelibly in such maddening clarity that his heart would not be pacified.

 

"Khun Phra Nai."

 

"Mm?" He jolted at the sudden touch of a chill hand resting upon his shoulder. Turning around to the wee boy with a wary glance, the man let out a sigh of relief upon seeing Kaewta, now fully dressed in clean, dry clothes.

 

"I shall wipe you down now, my lord. Please, come sit over here." The young aristocrat nodded. Yet he was wondering why his heart still beat like a piphat ensemble's drums.

 

The late-night air was bitterly cold. The small window had been shut tight to bar the wintry air. The mattress was vacant and icy, with no sign of the patient having lain on it. Yet on the floor, where a cloth had been spread as a sheet to ward off the chill for the caregiver, two bodies huddled close, so near they seemed almost fused into one.

 

"Umm..." A faint murmur escaped before the smaller body burrowed toward the warmth, and the human quilt, smiling fondly, ran a broad hand affectionately along the soft hair. Since his wounds had begun to heal and he could move about with ease, this had not been the first night he had crept down to lie beside the young one on the floor.

 

Only one mattress was here, and Kaewta gave it away to the wounded one like him. Yet, how could Khun Phra Nai sleep in warmth and comfort while the one he cherished lay on the hard, frigid floor? He had tried to persuade the young man to share the mattress, even offered to give it up entirely, yet Kaewta, stubborn as ever, refused to comply.

 

Thus, each night, the nobleman would steal down from the mattress and wrap his arms around the smaller figure to temper the cold. At dawn, he crawled back to the mattress before the youth woke up. But today, he failed to escape in time when those small eyes opened before he could let loose his arms from the tapering waist for the gaze that locked onto that winsome face for too long.

 

"Uh..." Kaewta froze where he had lain. At first, he thought he was trapped in a fever dream brought on by the cold, but then he found the source of warmth staring straight into his eyes with their noses scarcely a breath apart.

 

.. I was afraid you would be cold."

 

A sudden flutter welled in Kaewta's chest the moment that strong arm began to pull away from his waist. The deep voice was gentle but hesitant, and the alluring gaze carried an unspoken hope. Kaewta could not quite decide which part of his heart cried out for that warmth to stay, even for seconds longer. He wouldn't mind. And it widened Khun Phra Nai's eyes in disbelief when Kaewta closed his eyes and shifted toward Khun Phra Nai's warmth.

 

"I haven't woken up, sir," came the muffled, sweet reply. The lovely face snuggled up to his solid chest. The nobleman untied the knot between his brows before unfurled a broad smile. His eyes twinkled with unbridled joy, and his heart thundered so loudly he feared the youth would hear, yet he had no fear of it, because that was all he wished Kaewta to hear.

 

He tightened his embrace, wanting none of the cold to trespass on the one in his hold....not even by the barest fragment. What madness had he just done! The youth inwardly cursed himself for letting his pleading gesture slip through. 

 

When waking up again to full daylight, he still found himself curled in Khun Phra Nai's arms! Kaewta shoved the strong arm from his waist and sat by the brook. He dared not return to the hut until the afternoon wore on. The nobleman could no longer bear the wait and came after him at last.

 

"Kaewta." The youth made no reply. He remained seated. A rosy hue bloomed across his cheeks when the nobleman sank beside him.

 

"This injury wasn't entirely ill-fated, don't you think?'

 

"How could you say not ill-fated? You were on the brink of death, sir!" Whirling around, Kaewta loudly retorted. It prompted a wide grin from the nobleman's lips, finally drawing the youth's attention.

 

"At least I had you to tend me."

"I had no alternative!"

 

"Truly? At least I learned how deeply you care for me."

"That's..."

 

"Are you going to claim again that you had no alternative? I'm not convinced." Khun Phra Nai flashed a broad grin with a gaze that never left the smooth face of the one before him. The pale cheeks flushed, and the delicate tips of his ears reddened, tingling the nobleman's heart.

 

"..."

"Kaewta, I wish us to remain exactly as we are now in all tomorrows."

 

The sonorous voice held no trace of a joke. The youth turned toward him, and those sweet, luminous eyes were tinged with sheer sorrow. "I long to speak with you like this every day; to wake and see your face every dawn; to watch you smile at me before falling asleep; to share every meal; to keep you ever within my arms; to care for you until my time is through."

 

"...That can never be."

 

"Have I not said it before? Though you are a man instead of A maiden, I shall love you still. I love you for being you, not for who I wish you to be, nor for who the world expects you to be."

 

His broad shoulders trembled beneath the overwhelming mix of feelings: joy, sorrow, and anguish intertwined.

 

"I long to be with you, laugh together, seek happiness, and look after one another, the way that we do now."

 

Kaewta made no reply. He could not lie to himself that, throughout the past ten-odd days, it was an utter elation. Every passing day he spent with the other person exasperated him, tended to him, kept him close, and revealed both his flaws and virtues. They shared embraces against the chill, breathed the same air when they faced one another before sleep. That gentle heat now clung fast to his heart, and with it another feeling buried deep...

 

"Does the wound... still hurt?"

"Hmm?"

 

"You shall need a foreign doctor to look at it when you return."

"Kaewta?"

 

"Would you like to return at once, today or tomorrow, sir?"

 

"Kaewta, I gave you my word; I shall never stop loving you!" The deep voice stood firm to his conviction as he seized Kaewta's slender hand and held it fast. His handsome face was a picture of panic and aching. He raised the smaller hand to his rough cheek and made a plea.

 

"..."

“I know you are afraid. I, too, once feared. But when I looked out and could not find you on the day that I tried to let go of this feeling, I felt as though I'd rather die, as though my heart was torn apart. It hurts here...at my very heart."

 

The sturdy hand reached out to take the youth's and pressed it over where his heart lay beneath. "If Kaewta doesn't want it, then cease its beating now."

 

"It hurts..." The youth lifted his face, slender eyes glistening with tears. The taller man's eyes flung wide as Kaewta withdrew his hand that had rested upon that solid chest to lay against the left side of his own.

 

"Kaewta?"

 

"It hurts here as well, sir. It hurts terribly. I know it's a forbidden feeling, yet my heart is too stubborn despite trying."

 

"Kaew..."

"It hurts still."

 

"My dear Kaewta, forgive me, but I do love you." Khun Phra Nai lifted his hand and gently wiped off those tears. The youthful face closed his eyes, soaking up the warmth, full of strain. He nodded before resuming to meet those eyes as Khun Phra Nai whispered his plea again. "Will you allow me to love you, Kaewta?"

 

"Um." The youth nodded in reply, and at the very second, Kaewta beheld the loveliest smile he had ever seen.

Queen of my heart, don't stray,

Keep crowning your throne, don't sway,

You're my heart and soul, don't fight,

Be my blood and air, I breathe life.

A panicked cry drifted to his ear. He fought to pry open leaden lids to peer at the owner of that voice, yet darkness shrouded his consciousness, and all his senses slipped away.

 

"Why hasn't he woken up?" croaked an anxious, age-worn tone.

 

"The doctor said he's not in any danger. Please stay calm for now, Auntie," replied a younger voice, followed by a soft sigh. Slowly, he forced his eyes open.

 

"Kaew!" came the girl's voice, then another person's. The boy did not answer. His gaze wandered about the room until his memory resumed, telling him where he was.

 

"How do you feel, my dear? Are you hurting anywhere?" Chan Pen asked anxiously upon seeing her son's move.

 

"Mom... Ruedee," Kaewta rasped a reply. Glancing out the window, he realised it was in the hospital during the daytime. The boy tried to sit up his frail body against the headboard with Ruedee's help.

 

"Why did you do such a thing?!" As soon as her worry had subsided, it gave way to a rush of anger so fierce it nearly drove her to tears. Never had she dreamed her well-behaved son would commit something so outrageous.

 

"What did I do, Mother?"

 

"Don't play the fool! What did you give Chai to drink? He slept like the dead, letting the incense burn to its very end, and left you asleep until late at night! If Ruedee hadn't sensed something was wrong and gone to the White Manor, would you have just slept yourself into the grave?"

 

"It was just a candle-bush tea, Mother." The son replied meekly, unable to meet his mother's eyes.

 

"Candle-bush tea! You, did you?!"

 

"Oh, Mother, I never thought that it would make Phi Chai fall into such a deep slumber. I did it for a good cause; seeing him watch over me all alone, I made him some tea to drink while reading and waiting for the incense to burn out..."

 

The boy's excuse only mounted Chan Pen's anger. She stared at her son in disbelief. That mischievous glint in those eyes and playful demeanour was something that had been restrained after the age of ten. It brought her a whirl of joy, exasperation, and worry warring within her.

 

"What's wrong with the candle-bush tea, Auntie?" Ruedee asked, not understanding how it could be linked to her brother's slumber.

 

"It is what made your brother sleep so deeply, just as we found him." At that, Ruedee joined Chan Pen in casting a furious glare at Kaewta.

 

"Oh, I am truly sorry! I won't do such a thing again, I promise, Mom... Ruedee..." At the end of the sentence, he turned to make an apology to his friend with a pitiful expression.

 

"You have to apologise to Chai as well. He's now blaming himself for having let you sleep so long that you might be in danger."

 

"Roger, ma'am!" The boy answered at once and hopped off the bed, but his knees failed him and sent him crumpled to the floor.

 

"Please wait a little longer; you slept the whole day away, so you may not regain your full health yet. Have a proper meal first, then you may go." Chan Pen spoke with a weary heart. Kaewta glanced up at her, smiling sheepishly, obediently climbed back onto the bed, and gobbled down his meal. When his strength returned, he set off to find the one to whom he owed an apology.

 

"Phi Chai..." The man startled and took a fleeting glance at the boy for a moment, then quickly averted his gaze. Seeing that, the one at fault became downcast. "I'm sorry," Kaewta folded his hands into an apologetic wai.

 

"Don't do such a thing again. You know well how deeply we all worry about you."

 

"Yes."

"There will be no visiting the White Manor next week."

 

"Excuse Me?"

 

"Aunt Chan Pen and I had a discussion and agreed to punish you for your mischief, Kaew."

 

"No, please!" Kaewta cried out in protest and tried to scramble to dissuade the other person, but Chai's stern look showed how strong-willed he was and that he would no longer be lenient with the boy.

 

"Perish the thoughts of sneaking off to the White Manor alone. And don't even think of seeking any sedative to slip into my drink because I won't take any foods or drinks from you ever again!" Chai left right after his sentence ended, leaving the boy's mouth hanging agape with eyes that followed 

 

Chai's broad back, and at a loss for how to retaliate. After finally gathering his wits, Kaewta was even more resolute that he would find another potion to put the man into slumber longer than ever!

 

Chai plunged himself onto the seat, weary. The moment he saw Kaewta approach to offer his apology, he was both relieved and frustrated that the boy seemed to sweep aside the loving care he had given. If it wasn't for Ruedee, who sensed something was wrong, he might still be trapped in a deep sleep and put the boy in danger. It was also his own fault for failing to notice that Kaewta grew more keen to uncover the past each day, to the point of drugging him into sleep to satisfy his curiosity more profoundly. 

 

Once he opened his eyes and saw Kaewta's deathly pale body cradled in Chan Pen's arms, his heart almost leapt into his throat. His rage flared up, and he accused that nobleman of wishing to follow Kaewta into the grave and be together for all eternity. 

 

Until the moment he regained consciousness after Kaewta was under the doctor's care, Chai ultimately realised he shouldn't blame it on Khun Phra Nai, the man with those doleful eyes, yet full of love and longing. What Khun Phra Nai appeared to him was someone who would never lay his finger on Kaewta.

 

════[changbins_delulu_wife]════

 

Kaewta fidgeted in his seat before the venerable monk when he was given a reproachful look. Meanwhile, a variety of excuses to argue were prepared silently in his head if he was forbidden from visiting White Manor.

 

"You become more like him each day."

"Sorry?"

 

"Nothing." The monk sighed, lifting his cup of tea for a sip. How could he possibly tell that this Kaewta grew more and more like that other Kaewta with each passing day?

 

"Uh... Won't you stop me from going to the White Manor, Venerable Father?" the young man questioned.

 

"And if I did, would you heed it? Because I know for sure I would waste my breath. Your stubborn nature; even if you were to be born in a new life, this would not be rid of you so easily." The monk sighed once more as he spoke. The boy offered a sheepish smile in return.

 

"Uh..."

"What is it now?"

 

"Since that day, I haven't seen either Khun Phra Nai or Saen. They..." Are they still in this realm?"

 

"When will you come to practice meditation?"

 

"Uh..." Kaewta looked up at him, puzzled. Was he not the one posing the questions? And yet it seemed he was the one now called to answer instead. 

 

It had been nearly ten days since his last visit to White Manor. Chai stood firm to his word that he wouldn't let Kaewta visit there. Besides, he had been watched closely at every step by his mother and Ruedee, so he had not met Khun Phra Nai and Saen since. How long had it been since he last saw them so far? Five days? Ten? Or perhaps even longer than that ...

 

"Well?" The reverend monk repeated his question.

 

"Tomorrow, then, Venerable Father." At the very least, he could dedicate merit to Khun Phra Nai, Saen, and Nanny Yam.

 

"Good! Then they will come seeking you themselves in no time." The honourable monk, or Laung Sanor, revealed a smile of pleasure.

But the love disease is severe,

More dire than any grief you fear,

Fiercer than fevers drawn too near.

If you cannot hold it as you seek,

It flames like wrath no breath can weak.

Just one day kept at bay.

Your thoughts are tossed in burning slay 

 

════[changbins_delulu_wife]════

 

That place…Is that the place he was? The woman sat, pondering, as she stared at the painting before her, as though the portrait within might answer her question. Her bewitching eyes gleamed, followed by a smile that unfurled on her lips; she must go there.

 

Sophee could hardly contain her eagerness for tomorrow to come. She took leave from work and headed straight to the White Manor after seeing the boy, and Chai visits the place every Saturday, convincing her that her man must have been there. Slowly, her elegant hand pushed the gate open, but her slender brows furrowed when she found the building was dilapidated as if abandoned. All the trees were dense and gloomy, as if forsaken. The ambience fell under eerie quietude as if no other living soul remained there but Sophee herself.

 

"Phi, Phi?" The lady called out. She believed that he must be hiding somewhere in this place. Yet, came no reply other than the howling wind. Sophee explored the area. Though the tightly clamped door was harshly battered and rocked, she couldn't enter the premises. Despite its ramshackle condition, teetering on the edge of ruin, why was it so hard to open? Sophee took a few steps back and gazed upward. On a balcony, where one window was left open ajar, a white curtain fluttered in the breeze as if beckoning her to come up.

 

"Or that kid has the key?" Sophee pondered. That must be it, because he came here every Saturday and was let in straightaway. If that were the case, she would only need to wait until the next Saturday and try to slip in again! No, not just Saturdays, too, but she needed to shadow that kid every step!

 

Sophee left with a sneer once her already-brewing scheme hatched. Behind her, the White Manor resumed its resplendent state as if the vision that Sophee had just seen was no more than an illusion. Yet, upon the second-floor balcony, the tall, well-proportioned figure of the manor's master watched her departure.

It seems Khun Sophee has found us at last, Master.'

 

I want to see Kaewta.'

'Yes?'

 

I fear Sophee may harm him once more, as she did.'

 

'You will see him tonight, I suppose.'

'Mm.'

 

Ever since Sophee had set foot upon the White Manor's grounds, the man and Saen had strained the remnants of their power to cast illusions and bar her from this residence. Yet, in the coming days, his power would prove insufficient to shield Kaewta from peril. Khun Phra Nai gazed heavenward to the sun-bright afternoon with apprehension. He wished no recurrence of the tragedy when he failed to defend the one whom he cherished most. Thus, he must amass more power.

 

"Will you be staying over at the temple again tonight?"

 

"Yes. I want to make merit for Khun Phra Nai, Saen, and Nanny Yam, too," Kaewta replied with a broad smile as he recalled the dream last night. Though there was no vision of their past, at least he had a chance to speak with Khun Phra Nai.

 

"Are you no longer afraid of them?"

"No. Not anymore. Because they will never do me wrong."

 

"But they are not truly living, Kaewta."

"What does it matter, Ruedee?"

 

"Nothing..." Ruedee murmured a half-hearted denial, fearing to reveal her unease to her friend, for Kaewta would be offended by her meddling. Catching the odd expression on his friend's face, Kaewta broke into a wide smile.

 

"What is that smile supposed to mean?" Ruedee lifted a brow in wonder; never had she seen her friend grin so broadly with both mouth and eyes.

 

"Last night, I dreamed of Khun Phra Nai."

"And then?"

 

"He said he was glad that I had at last begun to piece together the story he so longs to tell, and he presented himself in person to offer his thanks."

 

"Thanks for what?" Though Kaewta lit with delight, Ruedee did not share the same feeling. He was a ghost after all. No matter how striking he might be, he was no human!

 

"For the merit we transferred to him, of course."

 

‘I want to see Kaewta.'

'Yes?'

 

I fear Sophee may harm him once more, as she did.'

 

'You will see him tonight, I suppose.'

'Mm.'

"Enough of that. Let's hurry to class. Oh, have you heard? Now, a new professor is taking over for Arjan Kitti."

 

"Really?" Kaewta no longer wished to brood over Kitti anymore. Back then, he had been so enraged when his sketch was stolen. But last night, Khun Phra Nai told Kaewta that if he wanted to draw his portrait again, he should just let Kitti go. The picture would find its way back in due time. Besides, he could now draw Khun Phra Nai without a hitch. His hand danced freely as though long accustomed to capturing that countenance.

 

A bustling sound along the corridor caught their attention. They followed the crowd. Ruedee grabbed a classmate by the shoulder who was craning her neck and asked.

"What is all the commotion about?"

"The new professor has arrived."

 

"And why must everyone make such noises?"

 

"Because he's ridiculously handsome!" The friend exclaimed before hastily brushing off Ruedee's hand and turning her eager gaze back to the source of the excitement. Kaewta shook his head at those girly, giddy squeals.

 

"How handsome can he possibly be?" The boy muttered as he made his way toward the classroom.

 

"Who knows, he might be ridiculously handsome indeed, or even more handsome than your Khun Phra Nai, Kaew," Ruedee replied.

 

"What do you mean by my Khun Phra Nai..." Kaewta murmured, a faint blush rising to his cheeks.

 

"Kaew, may I ask you a question?"

"Speak."

 

"Do you really love that Khun Phra Nai-something, Kaew?"

 

"Why do you ask?" Kaewta's soft, husky voice grew curt, for Ruedee's tone screamed loud resentment as though she disapproved of his feelings toward Khun Phra Nai.

 

"I just don't want you to tangle your feelings." This was one thought that had long troubled her: what if her friend failed to tell dreams from reality?

 

"Tangle my feelings?"

"The person you are now is not the same as the one in your dreams."

 

"I am sorry, Ruedee, but I don't want to discuss it with you right now."

 

"Kaew!" Kaewta's flickering gaze startled her. Just as Kaewta pivoted away from his friend, the new professor walked up to the spot where they were standing. Ruedee's eyes flew wide; she stared at the newcomer, scarcely trusting what she saw. Her pale hand shot out and clamped Kaewta's arm in a tight grip.

 

"Ruedee?"

"It's him!" Ruedee pointed behind her friend with a trembling finger. Kaewta's gaze followed her gesture, and he, too, widened his eyes in shock.

 

"Khun Phra Nai!"