EXTERN

Chapter 5

 

I’m stressed. Right now, I’m at fucking crisis-level stress!

 

“Tell me again. Where the hell did Mai go?”

 

Breathe in…

Breathe ouuuut…

Like a flower blooooming…

 

“He ran off to the seaside.”

 

…I CAN’T FUCKING TAKE THIS ANYMORE!!!

 

“How the hell did he manage that?! And he’s not coming to rehearsal?! Does he think just because he’s Juliet I have to put up with this shit?! HUH?!”

 

Right now, it genuinely felt as though flames could burst out of my head.

 

My beloved little Juliet had fucking disappeared. All the other actors were sitting there staring blankly at me. At the same time, Romeo himself was slumped miserably in a corner of the room with the engineering gang, looking like an abandoned puppy.

 

Yeah! Brilliant! Every single fucking one of you! Is my whole production going to collapse?!

 

“P’Kan, calm down first. He went with Hia Pheem. He’ll be back soon,” Tonkla, Mai’s best friend, hurriedly explained, trying to improve the situation.

 

“Hia Pheem?… You mean P’Pheem, the surgeon? Didn’t he move to England?”

 

“He’s back in Thailand for a holiday.”

 

I let out a heavy sigh before calling the senior doctor I was close to. He was part of my university senior-junior lineage. When he got married, everyone in our line even video-called to congratulate him.

 

[What?]

 

“P’Pheem… give Mai back.”

 

[…Were you the one who made him cry and run away from home? Remind me where you live so I know which house to blow up.]

 

“Huh?! No, P’! I’m trying to get him back for theatre rehearsal!”

 

P’Pheem’s husband was the world's largest arms dealer. Who the fuck would dare argue with him?

 

Dr Pheem himself was already fiercer and more vicious than a Bangkaew crossed with a pit bull, and on top of that, he had one hell of a powerful husband backing him up!

 

[Theatre?]

 

“Yeah. The hospital charity play, remember?”

 

[Oh! Right, right. He’ll come back tomorrow. He probably can’t go back today. Let him stick his head underwater and rinse his brain out first.]

 

And who the hell was going to negotiate with that?

 

Guess we were doing it his way.

 

“Okay, P’.”

 

I ended the call and rolled my eyes in exhaustion.

 

Being an extern, a sixth-year medical student, was exhausting enough already. Now I had to exhaust myself doing extracurricular shit too.

I’m never fucking becoming student-union president again!!!

 

FOR FUCK’S SAKE!!!

“Urghhh.”

 

The more I thought about it, the more stressed I became, until I found myself aggressively ruffling my long fringe to vent my frustration.

 

“How’d it go, P’?”

 

Tum, one of Mai’s friends, poked his nose in nosily.

 

“REHEARSAL’S CANCELLED! CANCELLED!!! 

 

We’ll wait for our fucking leading lady to come back tomorrow!”

 

I shook my already-messy hair again and stormed out of the auditorium in a foul mood.

My life had been a complete fucking mess lately.

 

My wife dumped me. Somehow, I’d acquired a husband. And work was piling up like I was some superstar celebrity. Fuuuuuck! I want to shave my head and become a monk!

 

“Kan.”

 

I turned towards the voice I’d been familiar with for the past five years.

 

“I thought we’d already made everything clear.”

 

I sighed for what had to be the millionth time today. What the hell did Namfah want from me now? At this point, I was genuinely ready to breathe fire.

 

“You think you can just throw Fah away that easily?”

 

She folded her arms and raised her chin arrogantly.

 

Fuck. What the hell do you still have to be proud of? Your dignity? Because I sure as hell can’t see any.

 

“Listen—”

 

“I’m not throwing you away. I don’t want you anymore. Please understand that. Having to repeat myself is exhausting and a waste of time.”

 

With that, I immediately headed towards my car. But she ran after me and shoved me against my own BMW.

 

THUD!

“Ow!”

 

I grimaced and rubbed the side of my hip. Did she fucking kick me or shove me just then? That hurt like hell.

 

“Good! It should hurt! Then maybe you’ll understand that Fah’s hurting too!”

 

“What do you want?! Money or something?”

 

SLAP!

Once again, this woman’s hand sent my face snapping sideways. I’ll admit I was partly at fault. I had a vicious fucking mouth. But what was I supposed to do when I was almost at breaking point myself?!

 

“Fuck you! You think you can dump me that easily?!”

 

“Then what the hell do you want?!”

 

Now I was starting to lose my temper too.

 

“I’m not breaking up with you!”

 

“Have you tried using your brain? Do you seriously think we could ever get back together after this?”

 

I sighed and pushed my tongue against the inside of my cheek in irritation.

 

“Why? Or have you already got someone else?”

 

I rolled my eyes. How the hell was I supposed to get this woman out of my life?

 

Then, out of the corner of my eye, I spotted a familiar stubbly face happily strolling alongside a petite young woman. The two of them were heading towards a car. If I remembered correctly, that bastard Per was trying his luck with Nong Fon, the communications student who’d come to help me with the event.

 

…Oh.

Excellent.

Two birds with one stone.

 

“Yeah! Kan’s already got a husband.”

 

“Huh?!”

 

I strode straight over, stopped beside Mr Scruffy Hair, hooked an arm around his neck and dragged him over so my ex-girlfriend could see his face.

 

“This is Kan’s new boyfriend… No! Actually, this is Kan’s husband.”

 

“Huh?!”

 

The moustached idiot looked as though someone had just dropped a mountain onto his head.

 

“!!!!”

 

Namfah froze before shaking her head in disbelief.

 

“P’Kan? P’Per? What’s going on?”

 

Fon stared at me as I stood there with my arm around the poisonous snake’s neck while he still looked completely lost. She was probably confused as hell.

 

Sorry, Nong.

Sorry, Moustache.

 

But I refuse to be the only one getting fucked over here. Suffer with me.

 

“You think Fah’s stupid?! If you’re going to lie, couldn’t you at least make it believable?”

 

Oh, brilliant! Now she decides to be clever.

 

“Aww~ That’s unfortunate, babe. Looks like I’m going to have to show the lady it’s real…”

 

I smiled sweetly and tilted my head towards the taller man.

 

“!!!”

 

Then I grabbed the cool, handsome bastard by the neck, pulled him down and crushed my lips against his.

 

“!!!”

 

“AAAAH! Disgusting!”

 

“P’PER!! Why did you lie to Fon?! If you already have a wife, you should’ve told me!!!”

 

I could hear both women yelling nearby, but I barely registered them. All I could focus on was the kiss, which was becoming deeper by the second.

 

His large hand slid around my waist before immediately wandering down towards my hip.

 

Tug!

The hot, muscular bastard pushed me back against my own car and pressed himself closer, giving me a kiss that grew hotter and hotter until it felt as though my soul might leave my body.

 

It was like standing in the middle of a blazing fire. As though every part of me touched by him was burning away.

 

SHOVE!

“That’s enough, you bastard!”

 

I shoved the poisonous snake away and hastily wiped the saliva from my lips, suddenly finding the ground and sky extremely interesting.

 

My heart was beating strangely…

Must be getting ill from overworking myself.

 

“Can’t I have just a little more, babyyy~?”

 

Moustache whined, edging closer until I raised my knee threateningly.

 

“If you want your balls smashed, keep trying, Nong Per.”

 

“Come oooon! What the hell~? You used me to get rid of your girl, and now I’ve lost the girl I was chatting up to! You owe me compensation!”

 

God, I fucking hated that whiny voice and melodramatic behaviour of his.

 

“Why?! If you want her, go after her and apologise yourself. I’m going home. I’m sleepy!”

 

I snapped at him, strangely irritated without even understanding why.

 

I turned and walked around to the driver’s side, intending to head back to my condo finally. I really was starting to feel sleepy now.

 

“I don’t want her anymore… I want you. Let me come with you!”

 

Smack!

I planted my palm against his handsome face when I noticed him practically wagging an imaginary tail as he lunged towards me. Planning to steal another kiss, weren’t you?

 

“I’m not playing anymore! I’m exhausted. Go wherever the hell you want!”

 

I chased him away and shoved him back from the door.

 

“Then I won’t play anymore…”

 

“Good.”

 

Thinking my troublesome junior had finally decided to leave me alone, I opened the car door and climbed inside, putting the key into the ignition.

 

Snatch!

Grab!

Whoosh!

THUD!

CLICK!

 

“HEY!!!”

Everything happened ridiculously fast. A large hand stole my car key, and then the tall bastard bent down, grabbed me and slung me over his shoulder. He kicked my car door shut and locked it.

 

“…I’m done playing.”

 

His voice changed.

 

“I’m going to be serious now.”

 

“PUT ME DOOOOWN!!!”

 

And so, once again, I found myself sitting in his condo. Except now I was sitting there with my stomach growling while I waited for him to cook for me.

 

“Look at you, all domesticated!”

 

Yes. The bastard kidnapped me. We’d had a minor wrestling match after he tried getting handsy with me, but I complained that I was hungry first. Mr Owner-of-the-Room then refused to order food and insisted on showing off his cooking skills himself.

 

“I’d make a good husband too, you know.”

 

“I’m very happy for your future wife.”

 

I gave him a wicked smile. Watching that tall, muscular body wearing a Little Pony apron made my eyebrow twitch.

 

God, I fucking hated that little horse. And combined with this poisonous snake wearing it, I wanted to drag the bastard over and stomp on him until I felt better.

 

Ohhhh, little ponyyy~ Tiny little ponyyy~ Such a kind-hearted little ponyyyy~

 

“Then agree to be my wife. You can be proud of your husband.”

 

“Heh. Dream on, Nong Per.”

 

Mr Cool merely chuckled and went back to chopping vegetables.

 

I wandered around the kitchen, picking things up here and there. Anything edible went straight into my mouth, and because I was such a generous person, I occasionally shoved something into the tall guy’s mouth too.

 

“Is this actually going to be edible?”

 

I peered over his shoulder and realised he was making Massaman curry.

 

Whoa.

He’d picked something fucking difficult!

 

“One taste and you’ll be hooked.”

 

I smiled and lightly shook my head at the tall bastard’s arrogance before glancing at him again.

 

At the same moment, he looked down at me. Our faces were only a few centimetres apart. I wasn’t that much shorter than him, after all.

 

“…”

Looking at my junior from another faculty this closely made me realise just how ridiculously handsome the bastard actually was. Enough to make my heart unexpectedly flutter.

 

Those coffee-coloured eyes I apparently needed my daily dose of only made me want to stare longer. His nose was high and sharply defined. His full lips were beautifully shaped, and the faint stubble along his jaw was just rough enough to send a shiver through me whenever it touched my skin, making the man in front of me look even more ruggedly handsome.

 

“Doc…”

 

“Don’t say anything yet.”

 

I didn’t move away. I just kept staring at the tall man in front of me. I didn’t want to think about what I was about to do next.

 

“…”

 

“…Don’t say anything.”

 

I lifted myself slightly and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. He immediately turned towards me and returned it. Per wrapped his arms around my waist as though supporting me when I began to sway. I had to loop both arms around his neck to steady myself as the intimate touch between us gradually grew hotter.

 

Whoosh!

Per turned me around, backed me against the kitchen counter and lifted me onto it. His lips captured mine again, the kiss becoming deeper, sweeter and more consuming. So much that I didn’t want it to stop.

 

“Mmph!”