Chem Chey: English Translation.
"Let's fuck, Eung-eung :)"
"Uh, just hand me my phone! It's ringin' right there~" Akara pushed Intha's shoulder to create some distance, pulling his neck back to avoid the incoming kiss from those full lips.
Should I just resign to this now? That I've got a batshit boyfriend? And could that damn phone quiet down a bit? I'm gettin' up to answer it here!
"If you don't get up, Eung will go grab it himself," Akara said, exasperated.
"What did you just call yourself just now?"
"Eung... At home, I call myself by my name sometimes. It just slips out when I'm talkin' to others."
"That's so touching. The way you refer to yourself by your name is so cute." Intha sat up straighter as Akara headed back into the room to grab the phone. He clutched his chest dramatically and downed another beer can in one go. This absolutely made my day-it's so heartwarming.
Realising he'd been away from his wife for more than three seconds, Intha got up and followed Akara, who still had a stuffed toy tied to his waist, into the room. The bright lights revealed that the incoming call was a video call.
"Nok! You snake!" Akara exclaimed, his voice high-pitched as he jumped onto the bed, leaning his back against it. He stared at the bright red lips of Narisa, his best friend, who appeared to be in a long hallway, probably just off work.
"You've disappeared! Got a new hubby and forgot all about your friends, huh?"
"New hubby? How'd you know? I haven't told
anyone yet." Akara bit his finger nervously.
He'd been so busy with the bar that he hadn't had a chance to tell anyone about Intha. Besides, they'd only been dating for a few days.
[What? You posted a picture on the bar's page. That new sign-Chermchey-with that font that looks like it's from the Middle Ages. What were you thinking using that font?]
"My hubby thought of it."
[Bomb was right-your hubby has terrible taste.] Narisa rolled her heavily made-up eyes. Her long lashes fluttered dramatically as she looked at herself in the camera instead of at her friend, using the video call as an excuse to check her makeup. Is my lipstick smudged? Are my cheeks too pale? Ah, golly, the mascara on my eyebrows from this morning is still intact.
"And what does that motherfucker have to do with this?" Akara glanced at Intha, whose sunny demeanour had dimmed slightly after being criticised for his taste. He'd been so proud of that bar sign, and it was obvious who'd posted the picture on the page.
Intha sat at the edge of the bed, legs crossed, looking dejected as he fiddled with his bangs.
[Bomb shared it and captioned it, 'Picked a new hubby with the worst taste ever.']
"As if that asshole was so high and mighty. Someone like him? I'd love to smack him with a chair," Akara snapped.
No one insults my In-in!
My hubby. Only I get to cuss him out.
"Is the sign really that bad? Thon said it was cool this morning, and Thon never lies." It was as if a torrential downpour had just hit Intha's confidence. He pursed his lips, his pride in the sign taking a hit. He'd been so proud of it, loved it, loved it so much.
[Wait, whose voice is that? Who are you with, Eung?] Narisa's eyes widened in surprise when she realised her best friend wasn't alone.
"Don't tell me you're with your boyfriend."
"Yup, he's sulkin' now after bein' called tasteless. Gotta go comfort my man."
Stop! Wait! Show me his face! Put him on camera right now. I'll decide if he's good enough for you.]
"Nope. He's not goin' public. Mind your own business."
Welp, it's actually not about not goin' public, it's about me bein' possessive.
[Are you eating my mom's spicy salad tomorrow or not?]
"Oh, Nok, my dear friend, you know how inseparable gays and spicy salad are."
[Fine. If you want to eat, bring your boyfriend here so you can scan him. If he's as tasteless as Bomb says, I'll tell you to dump him and find someone better. Honestly, all the guys you'd picked... you're so hopeless. Every single one of them is a piece of shit.]
"This one came to me. I didn't go chasin' after him, just so y'know." Akara paused before turning to Intha.
"Hia, my friend wanna see you. Can you come on camera?" He nudged Intha's thigh with his foot.
The temple boy, his face and ears red from the alcohol, nodded. "Sure, but even if your friend doesn't like me, I'm not breaking up with you, Eung-eung."
"Oh, please. Eung-eung isn't breakin' up with you. C'mon."
[Oh my, Eung-eung. Someone as big as a giant as you calling themselves that. What's your man's name?]
Narisa asked, noticing the camera shaking as Akara adjusted it to fit Intha into the frame.
"His name's In. Graduated from university A. Used to be a pilot... for which airline again, Hia?"
Just hearing his educational background widened Narisa's eyes. When she heard the name of the airline Intha had worked for, she nearly fainted… Where did Eung even find someone like this? An elite... a total elite.
"Worked there for two years, then moved to another airline for two more years. The pay was good, but the work was gruelling," Intha answered casually, climbing onto the bed to sit close to Akara. The camera panned to his face, and the previously sulky Intha transformed into a composed and polite version of himself. Intha gave Narisa a soft smile, locking into his good-sir mode as he radiated a calm confidence.
"Your friend's cute. You're Nok-nok, right?" the good sir said in a low, gentle voice.. complete with an air of sophistication.
[Hi, Hia In. I'm Nok. Nok-nok. Interested in taking on a second wifey? I'm very close to Eung. We can share.]
Narisa's voice trembled slightly as she thought to herself. Bomb... Go fuck off to hell!!!
"Share what? I'm cuttin' ties with you today, bitch. That's it. No more talkin'. I don't share," Akara declared, leaning his head on Inha's shoulder to assert his claim.
[Wow, so possessive... soooo possessive.]
"Of course. So, is he as tasteless as Bomb says? The guy I'm leanin' on right now?"
[Don't you have eyes to see for yourself?]
"Big talk. When I see you, I'm slappin' you with a Christian Louboutin."
[I've got mine, too~ Not talking to you anymore. My boyfriend's waiting in the parking lot... Bye, Hia In. See you tomorrow morning at the bar when Eung isn't looking. I'll bring you some spicy salad. You're not allergic to seafood, right?]
"No.." Intha trailed off.
[BTW, I love the bar sign. Je l'adore~] Narisa made a heart gesture with her hands toward Intha, flirting openly in front of Akara. Before she could say more, Akara's tattooed hand reached out and ended the call coldly. But not before shouting to his friend:
"Nok, bring kids' spicy salad for Hia In. No veggies, for environmental protection."
"Kid's spicy salad..?" Intha repeated, raising an eyebrow after the call ended.
"It's just a non-spicy spicy salad with no veggies."
"And what about the adult spicy salad?" Intha's eyes gleamed impishly as he shifted to sit on Akara's lap.
"That one's spicy."
"Then tonight, I'm eating the adult. Extra spicy."
"Why does everythin' always lead back to somethin' sexual with you?"
"Because today, we haven't smashed yet. Not even once." Akara burst out laughing as Intha leaned in, pinning him down. It seemed Intha had finally figured out what 'smash' meant after hearing it at the market. Now, he fully understood But they didn't do it as his words had implied. Intha simply embraced him tightly, muttering through gritted teeth as he pinched Akara's waist hard enough to make him yelp.
"Fine, no smashing today. But that bar sign I ordered? Remember this-it's the coolest thing ever. Anyone who says it's tasteless... Must. Fucking. Die."
"Ow!!! But I didn't say it!" Akara protested. In the end, nothing happened that night. After Intha pinched Akara's waist with all the force of his love, the younger man retaliated by biting his shoulder hard enough to leave a mark. And not a playful bite! It's gonna be bruised for days.
With a lovesick glance, Akara looked over at Intha, who was sitting sulking in the corner of the room. When Akara noticed him looking, he glanced back briefly before turning away, tossing the towel he'd been using to dry his hair into the laundry basket. Then he climbed onto the bed, turning his back to Akara. He smelled fresh and clean after his shower, but his wifey still smelled bad to him.
"You started it," Akara muttered, staring at Intha's broad, shirtless back. Intha wasn't really sulking. He just wanted to be pampered. When he pouted, his lips stuck out adorably, making Akara want to smack him.
Intha didn't answer. He reached out to turn off the lights, even though the folk music from outside still played loudly. Akara let out a small protest at the sudden darkness, but when the other remained silent, he decided to head to the bathroom to clean up instead.
Left alone, Intha sat up and checked his phone, glancing at the time. He thought about meditating to get over his gloom about Akara not pampering him. He was a big dude with a gentle heart, deeply in love with his wifey, and loved being doted on. But then, the voice of the lovely Akara called out from the bathroom, and Intha immediately abandoned his sulk. He got up and leaned against the bathroom door, listening to what Akara had to say.
"Hia In. Come here. In... Hia In."
"I'm at the bathroom door. What is it?" Intha replied in a low voice, still pretending to be upset. But Akara's merry tone made it clear he was about to ask for something.
The usual something. "I'm hungry." Why can't I ever win the lottery like this? Intha thought, rolling his eyes. So demanding. Maybe I should give him ten rounds tonight to make him forget about being hungry. Let's see who wears the pants in this house!
"Hia... stop bein' mad at me. I'll make up with you. Let's eat instant noodles."
"What flavour? Regular tom yum or creamy tom yum?"
Now that's more like it. That's how you handle Intha. Whenever I say 'I'll make up with you,' he'll fold instantly.
"Regular."
"Alright, I'll go make it for you. Once you're done showering, come out and join me. I'll make it the best I can," Intha said, heading toward the kitchen.
"Hia..."
"You don't need to thank me or get emotional over something this trivial."
"No, no, I just wanted to say... add an egg to mine, pretty please?"
Intha threw a mock punch into the air, thinking Akara might be touched by his effort to make instant noodles. Nope. It's not that. He just wants it with an egg. Intha, don't complain. Just go make the instant noodles, this instant!
"Hia..."
"Even if you call me sweetly, I'm still not adding veggies for you. We're sharing one bowl!!"
"You even knew I wanted veggies."
"Of course, because I love you. I know everything about my Eung."
"In-in, you're so sweet."
"Don't just call me sweet. Just love me a lot, and that's enough."
Intha set the water to boil in the small kitchen area near the bedroom. He grabbed one of Akara's black tank tops to wear, since he didn't like cooking shirtless, even for instant noodles. Akara followed him out just as everything was ready. He sniffed the air dramatically, making loud noises until Intha turned to look at him.
"Your nose is like the 'OO' in Google."
"Oh my, callin' me out with no shame, aren't you? It smells amazin'. Whose boyfriend is this, makin' instant noodles so well? Can I take a picture?"
"Sure, go ahead." Intha assumed Akara would take a picture of the pot of noodles he'd just taken off the stove. But no, Akara pointed the camera at him instead.
"I need to promote the bar a bit. Let's post a handsome picture of the new owner to overshadow the bar sign backlash."
"The sign isn't that bad. If you keep this up, I'll pinch you again."
Akara ignored him, snapping a photo of Intha that turned out so good it didn't even need much editing. He posted it online right away. He even added a caption: Come meet the genius behind the bar sign
'Chermchey' this Friday at 8 PM onward. We're reopening with a fresh, better-than-ever vibe.
See you there:)
#ThislsMrEungsHubby
"I thought you were going to post the noodles on your IG, saying your hubby made them for you."
"Nah. Braggin' about my hubby can wait. Right now, it's all about business." Akara carried the pot of noodles to the dining table along with two pairs of chopsticks. No need to transfer it to bowls-they were famished.
"You already posted it on the bar's page?"
"Yup. My hands are quick, and so is my heart."
"Let me see. I'll just check on your phone."
"Nope~. Go get your own phone. I'm monitorin' the engagement on this one," Akara refused. Intha sighed and went back to the bedroom, returning with his phone.
Scroll, scroll, scroll... He stared at his own flabbergasted face in the photo.
"Wow, even when I'm not at my best, people are liking it like crazy. But wait, why are you reopening the bar on Friday?"
'Cause the renovations are almost done. Just need to set up the new furniture." The work had been quick since it was just a paint job and some furniture changes. The contractor had said it'd be done by tomorrow.
"But we haven't done an opening ceremony for the new bar yet."
"Do we... really need to do that?" Akara's cheeks were puffed as he chewed on noodles. He put down his chopsticks when he saw Intha's serious expression. He wasn't familiar with religious ceremonies; the opening ceremony was a foreign concept to him.
"Technically, we should."
"I didn't know. Can we do it the day after tomorrow? The bar will still be closed then."
"We won't have enough time to prepare."
"Then when should we do it?"
"We need to consult Luang Por for an auspicious date first."
"If we wait for an auspicious date, we're gonna go bankrupt."
"..." Intha just stared incredulously at Akara and his wide, innocent eyes. Eung-eung really doesn't know about these things. Oh well.
"We usually close on Mondays, right? We can pick a convenient Monday to invite the monks," Intha suggested.
"Are you sure that's okay?" Akara quirked an eyebrow as he sat cross-legged on the chair. Intha didn't answer immediately. Instead, he sat down next to Akara, tying his bangs into a small bun with a rubber band he found on the table.
"Yeah, it'll be fine. Just eat your noodles. Don't worry your pretty head about it."
"..."
"I said, don't worry," Intha stirred the pot to bring the egg to the surface, not looking at Akara but aware that he was probably feeling guilty for deciding the reopening date without consulting Intha first.
"But what if it's not auspicious, Hia?"
"As long as I'm here, the bar is already blessed. Go ahead and make a queue sign."
"So narcissistic."
"I'm serious. Don't believe me? Go check the bar's page."
Akara unlocked his phone and opened the page again. His jaw dropped at the number of likes and shares, which had skyrocketed in such a short time. Just a moment ago, it'd been so quiet.
"How are there so many likes and shares?"
"I shared it and made all my friends and family share it too."
"Are you famous or somethin'?"
"I've got a bit of a following. It's all part of the plan. This is how you run a business," Intha said, pushing the now-empty pot of noodles toward Akara. He wiped his mouth and nose, which were running from the spiciness.
Meanwhile, Akara scrolled through the comments. The more he read, the more his thick eyebrows furrowed. I wanna eat the bar owner. Bitches... This place looks spicy, judging by P'In's body.
I knew it! In looks innocent, but fuck it, he's opening a goddamn bar! The bar sign suits N'In perfectly. I want to see Mr Eung's face... Mr Eung stole my hubby.
"Is this P'Nhai?"
"Where?" Intha leaned in, squinting at the spot Akara was pointing to. Yeah, that's definitely Nhai's Facebook account.
"Yeah. What did he comment?" Have no word for the bar name."
"And this one's P'Thon... 'I can't stand your love anymore.' Should I block him?"
"Eung, that's Naay's boyfriend. What did P'Lit post? 'See you soon.' Short, concise, and as cool as ever."
"What's so cool about 'See you soon'?" Akara asked, genuinely puzzled. He couldn't understand why a comment from someone with a tree as their profile picture had so many likes.
"It's cool because P’Lit said it. You'll understand when you meet him-the guy's hotter than Thailand's summer."
"But probably not as hot as the hell you drag me into every day, Hia."
"I take you to heaven, thank you very much! Not talking to you anymore. I'm going to bed. I'll wash the dishes tomorrow." Intha got up to escape Akara. But he heard the chair move as the younger man followed him. Intha felt an arm wrap around his waist, and Akara's face pressed against his back like a clingy kitten. It was endearing.
"I'll sleep with yoooou."
"Fine. Let's go to bed early for once. We'll need energy tomorrow to check on the renovations. Nok-nok's coming to visit, too." Intha pulled his partner into the bedroom. He pushed Akara onto the bed and climbed under the blanket to cuddle him.
There was still a faint smell of tom yum noodles lingering, so Intha sealed it with a kiss, confirming that Akara was the most delicious of all!
BANGARANG
YOU FEEL THE
BANGARANG
YOU FEEL THE (BASS)
BANGARANG
YOU FEEL THE
BANGARANG
YOU FEEL THE (BASS)
(Bangarang by Skrillex)
"Fuck you!!!"
"Hahaha!"
"Did I let you sleep too much last night, Eung? Is that why you're waking me up with this damn song?" Intha grumbled, gripping the bedsheet tightly as he buried his head under the pillow. He wasn't fully awake yet, even though Akara had been trying to wake him for a while.
"You're so hard to wake up. It's already nine. Time to get up." Akara finally turned off the song when he saw Intha sit up groggily. He pinched Intha's cheek and smiled at his sleepy, half-awake face. "I bought congee for you. Don't forget to eat after you shower. I'm headin' out to check on the renovations."
"What about the morning kiss?"
"With breath like this and you're still askin'..?"
"It's not that bad! Why are you up so early today, anyway?" Intha stretched to shake off the sleepiness. His half-closed eyes tried to focus on Akara's face.
'Cause I had a dream."
"A nightmare?"
"No, it was a good dream. I dreamed you took me on a trip."
"Tell me. Where did I take you in the dream? I'll write it down and take you there."
"To hell."
Damn it, Eung.
"I already take you there every day, don't I?" He pulled Akara in a playful headlock and messed up his already messy hair even more.
"Ow! I was jokin'! I'll tell you now. In my dream, you took me to the beach. The water was so clear, the sand was so pristine, and you even bought me a mermaid tail. I was lyin' in the shallow water, wavin' my tail, and you said I looked smokin' hot."
"And then I fucked you, right?"
"That's it. Dream over. My sweet dream just turned into gay porn," Akara murmured, pouting as he pushed Intha's arm off his neck. But honestly, the dream had been amazing... truly amazing.
"Do you want to go to the beach?"
"Yup. Who wouldn't wanna go to the beach with their boyfriend?"
"How about Samed Island? Everyone always 'comes' there."
"Beautiful beaches, clear water, but can you not drag me into sex jokes for once?" Akara rolled his eyes. He didn't want to banter with Intha, but his boyfriend always managed to steer the conversation into something dirty.
"We'll figure out where to go later. Have you had breakfast yet?"
"Yup, I'm good. Nok's already here downstairs. She's arguin' with the workers about a crooked picture frame. I came up to wake you, and now I'm headin' back down to keep her company."
"Okay, I'll shower, eat, and then come down," Intha nodded in acknowledgement. Initially, he thought about asking Akara to wait for him so they could head down together after he got ready. But since Nok-nok is already downstairs, let the friends hang out together. It's not that they're going to commit adultery, maybe.
"Make sure you dress modestly today. Button up all the way here, or Nok might harass you," Akara commanded, gesturing exaggeratedly as he pinched the collar of Intha's shirt with his tattooed fingers.
His expression was so serious that the temple boy couldn't help but laugh. He gave Akara a light shove on the head, prompting the other to leave the room. Intha got ready quickly. He put on a short-sleeved cream-colored shirt, buttoning it all the way up as instructed. He paired it with dark navy three-quarter-length pants, tucking the shirt neatly into the waistband. He carefully combed his bowl-cut hair into place, added a pair of trendy glasses, and finished the look with an SSR sacred amulet.
I'm so ready to face the world. But just as he was about to head out...Buzz, buzz. The phone on the bed vibrated. It wasn't his, it was Akara's. He entered the passcode his boyfriend had willingly shared with him and saw that the message was from Bomb on LINE.
Bomb: Eung, want to meet up?
Chermchey: Where?
Bomb: The usual place.
Chermchey: What the *censors* is "the usual place" supposed to mean?!
Bomb: *sends location*
Chermchey: Fine. Half an hour. You'll see me then.
After finalising the plans, Intha deleted the chat history. His stern expression softened into a bright smile as he walked down the stairs. He greeted the workers briefly, let Narisa tease him a little, and then informed Akara that he'd be stepping out for about an hour and would be back soon.
"I need to pick up an amulet I bought. I forgot I was supposed to get it today."
"Oh, pickin' up an amulet? No wonder you're dressed like this today."